hydratrashmeme + pair:bucky/natasha   1

Tainted Touch (a.k.a. Bucky's broken dick, Natasha strapon version.)
Hey, I hope this is allowed, but I was filling this prompt on Round 2, but I see Round 2 is already barely getting updated. I still have quite a lot to go, so I thought I'd move it here so it doesn't tumblr into oblivion. This is the original prompt, I have no idea if the OP of it is still around - but hey, I'm having fun with it: <i>Because decades of man-on-man Hydra rapes, Bucky basically can't get it up with a woman anymore, certainly not if he's expected to be the more active party. He can't get hard during a blowjob, he can't stay erect long enough to actually have intercourse. He wants to, he tries, but he just can't. The more he tries, the more he can't, of course. He suspects he might still get gratification from being fucked and humiliated during sex, and in a moment of desperation he ends up asking Nat for help. Basically he suspects he might need to be dominated, fucked hard with a strapon, maybe be slapped around some and be called names and humiliated. Nat is sort of cool with that, she's not squeamish about sex, but Bucky is still incredibly embarrassed and full of guilt about needing this (and also remembers penetration being brutal and painful, so he's scared), which causes it to fail at first, too, causing even more angst. Give me all the angst and tears and emotional pain of trying to make this work. Give me all the embarassment, guilt and feelings of inadequacy on Bucky's end. Physically, it gets him off, emotionally it wrecks him. Bonus round 1: This starts out as somewhat of a business transaction where Nat sort of sees herself doing therapy for him, but they end up developing genuine, deep feelings for each other, causing it to be harder on both of them. Bonus round 2: Especially the humiliation part becomes hard on Nat, especially realizing this has actually been done to him. Progressively worse top drop on her end would be glorious. Extra bonus if she actually enjoys fucking him, but feels guilty. Bonus round 3: Falling in love with Bucky in earnest also brings up feelings of hurt in relation to her infertility. I do not like how it was done in AoU, but maybe someone here can do it better. It's not like she feels like a monster because of it, but she is surprised she actually might *consider* it, but the reality of her own body and the fucked up situation makes it crazy to think it, but she things it anyway. Bonus round 4: Bucky even-ntually desperately trying to reciprocate and trying to please Nat sexually, but failing. Nat being sad but patient. Bonus round 5: throughout all this Bucky repeatedly relives his trauma, but he's afraid to tell her in fear she might stop, until he too finally breaks down and Nat is angry but also deeply sad. Bonus round 6: All the weepy loving and kissing despite broken dicks. Yeah, I thought about this way too much. </i>
post.3  -filled  -wip  char:bucky  char:natasha  pair:bucky/natasha  kink:broken.dick  kink:rape.aftermath  kink:bdsm  kink:humiliation 
september 2015 by hydratrashmeme

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