Twitter
Yes you do.

It will be your legacy.

Period.
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7 hours ago
Twitter
Dear God,
Please use Lin-Manuel as your vessel to get 15-year-old drama club girls listening to Mobb Deep.
In concl…
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15 hours ago
Twitter
*Elon Musk exists*

ME: he seems like an asshole but what can you do

*Elon Musk says ANYTHING about Iain M. Banks*…
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16 hours ago
Milton Friedman – Letter to President Augusto Pinochet | Genius
Here's what Milton Friedman told Augusto Pinochet. The rest, as they say, is history.
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21 hours ago
Twitter
ME AT EPCOT IN 1992: “oh my god a video telephone call? that would be the greatest thing ever!”

ME NOW: “someone t…
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yesterday
Twitter
Folks protested for a week straight after Trump was elected, but suddenly the streets are clear now that the Trump…
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yesterday
Twitter
... Except for you asylum-seeking Dads whose kids have been placed in detention. Not you guys.
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yesterday
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At a Mexican restaurant, a guy left and got into a big truck with two huge flags: The US and the final confederate…
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yesterday
Twitter
also Solange agrees with me on this therefore I’m right
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yesterday
Twitter
I’ve said this before, but it bears saying again - if you’re a writer or artist of any kind one of the best things…
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yesterday
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2 people I know who broke up years ago are on separate romantic vacations w their partners IN THE SAME GREEK TOWN &…
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yesterday
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Why go to great lengths to justify JavaScript when people like this are driving everyone towards us by being dickhe…
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yesterday
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The most pernicious, outdated pop culture trope that needs to die is that male nerds are cultural underdogs who are…
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yesterday
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Giant black bear just ran across NY RT390, half a mile north of exit 37. 3 seconds later and it would’ve been insid…
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yesterday
Twitter
They’re very close to making pride flags for fascism
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yesterday
Twitter
I am not an “atheism is a religion too!” kinda Christian, but THESE fuckos are totally a religion, and they think t…
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yesterday
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RT : I want to ask all the people saying conditions aren’t “that bad” in these child prisons what kind of prison conditi…
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yesterday
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I basically never mention this guy bc his people are everywhere and he’s such a weaksauce villain but these SAME DU…
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yesterday
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Shocking that the spiritual vacuum in modern human lives is getting filled so neatly by...an essentially spiritual…
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yesterday
Twitter
They’re listening to a garden variety sermon about complementarianism which they could get at half the churches in…
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yesterday
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P*ters*n is making such a clearly religious argument about what men and women are *supposed* to do in relation with…
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yesterday
Twitter
I love that Iceland's goalkeeper is also a filmmaker

this is the best team to root for
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yesterday
Twitter
They coulda saved a ton of research grant money by just listening to Tupac, Kendrick, and Trick Daddy.
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yesterday
Twitter
1. Families are being ripped apart because of new Trump administration policy

2. Virtually every Senate Dem has s…
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yesterday
Twitter
Democrats have introduced a Senate bill to stop family separation. Zero Republicans have signed on.…
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yesterday
Twitter
The most successful people I've met:

1. Were born between 1945-1960
2. Are white
3. Received debt-free higher educ…
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yesterday
Twitter
And then, when walking to the train, a mom was explaining Pride to her daughter, starting with "remember when we we…
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yesterday
Twitter
watching this game at an airport and a dude next to me who definitely doesnt know a lot about soccer is trying to e…
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yesterday
Twitter
Scene: bus, Edinburgh
Scottish Woman Behind Me, to her friend: "It's a shame! It's Gay pride,"
(I stiffen)
SWBM, co…
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yesterday
Twitter
We've asked ourselves for nearly a century how Germans could have just gone along with Hitler's orders, yet we're s…
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yesterday
Twitter
Can’t hear you, your common-law wife is masturbating too loudly as I take your guns.
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yesterday
Twitter
Real talk, when I did my will, my lawyer could only convince me to leave $ to my kids to help pay for college IF a)…
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yesterday
Twitter
There should be a 110% death tax on the estates of people who die with over $25,000 worth of assets. Fuck your “leg…
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yesterday
Twitter
It's about time that reporters started to confront the President on his chronic lies.
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yesterday
Twitter
The game of taking away disabled people’s health care or the game of putting kids in for-profit prison camps? ⚾️
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yesterday
Twitter
Did you actually just start this garbage fire of a tweet with “no one likes separating children from parents?”
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yesterday
Twitter
The most successful people I’ve met:

1. Like Pina Coladas
2. And getting caught in the rain
3. Aren’t into yoga
4.…
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yesterday
Twitter
every so often i have myself a nice week and i celebrate friday nite. treat myself well. get extremely faded off th…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Are we really placing the law above the fact we fundamentally believe families are meant to be together? Jesus flip…
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2 days ago
Twitter
What could the purpose of dividing families—even law breaking ones—be other than to inflict cruel and unusual punis…
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2 days ago
Twitter
this little girl is the same age as my daughter. luna is the happiest thing. the funniest girl. and she is absolute…
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2 days ago
Twitter
I totally get why electronic gizmos need to be replaced every few years. They wear out!

*switches on 1954 Fender t…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Seconded. All who treated his bigotry as a joke or a ratings boost, who dismissed those who warned of autocracy as…
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2 days ago
Twitter
“slaves got free food and housing, you know”
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2 days ago
Twitter
It brings me joy and comfort to know that, despite the propaganda and fearmongering by transphobes, this site is st…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Massive thank you to , , and for making this RT hat trick a reality.
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2 days ago
Twitter
Herman Melville was a whale.
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2 days ago
Twitter
Dear California, I love your coastline. I love your wildflowers. I love your ocean. I love your wine country. I lov…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Maybe you should quit. Doesn’t sound worth it.
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2 days ago
Twitter
This is one way to decline an invite.
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2 days ago
Twitter
I’m laughing socialistically.
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2 days ago
Twitter
(accumulating obscene personal wealth while millions die in poverty) hey....everyone else is the asshole
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2 days ago
Twitter
Awesome. Those look like really great resources. Godspeed, functional adventurer!
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2 days ago
Twitter
sometimes i wonder if i'm too hard on The Media, just sitting here taking cheap shots like some Monday morning QB,…
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2 days ago
Twitter
jesus christ it's the same fucking party. they've all lined up behind Trump. fucking Mitt Romney is on his team. it…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Trying to teach myself proper “functional programming” and “modern JS.” Not easy for someone whose first programmin…
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2 days ago
Twitter
I am so confident that the Good People who are dismissing the pain of these immigrant families have often said “the…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Gmorning.
7.6 Billion people at this 🌍 right now.
I’m SO glad you made it.
Walk around,
Mingle,
I’m gonna talk to…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Trump just said he wishes American people would "sit up and listen" to him the way Kim Jong-un’s people do. Kim Jon…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Happy anniversary to my beautiful parents. Here’s a quick pic of them from last weekend!
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2 days ago
Twitter
There’s a big line of storms just to our east giving us a creepy swirly wind so obvs I’m having coffee on the deck…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Dear people citing The Bible:
It’s a cool book with some wonderful passages but it also has ghost sex & giants & s…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Remember when Kim Davis refused to issue gay marriage licenses and Republicans were all like “You can’t do that! Th…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Kate Middleton may be a queen someday. Amy Poehler already is.
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3 days ago
Twitter
Just to be clear: It's definitely ok if some folks only like my old work & not my new work. I'm honored yall give m…
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3 days ago
Twitter
Today, the New York Attorney General said that the President of the United States is someone who should be banned f…
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3 days ago
Twitter
I keep thinking about those two parents, in a foreign country, video-chatting with their eight month old baby once…
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3 days ago
Twitter
State of morality in America:

1. The federal gov’t is forcibly separating immigrant children from their parents

2…
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3 days ago
Twitter
It’s almost incomprehensible a person can work for ICE & go to work every day, do morally reprehensible shit enforc…
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3 days ago
Twitter
Just found out that the reason WWDC has a Code of Conduct is because someone from Apple read ours, and asked manage…
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3 days ago
Twitter
this is identical to Stalin's argument after he forcefully deported and murdered thousands of Crimean Tatars, and P…
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3 days ago
Twitter
So today's public trial balloon is that the Bible requires submission to the government and to question the governm…
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3 days ago
Twitter
As if they haven't sunk low enoug, the GOP is now going to try to use a bunch of functionally kidnapped children as…
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3 days ago
Twitter
the only appropriate response to conference dudes asking women if they're REALLY engineers
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3 days ago
Twitter
The idea that marginalized writers ought to avoid certain "predictable" subjects in writing is part of the same sys…
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3 days ago
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