asterisk2a + love   20

Pando: The more we Tinder, the more things stay the same
- there is no perfect out there. - The Darkest Truth About Love - youtu.be/fNy5umFAnDo // its the easiest non-scariest thing to do, to swipe. to judge. without anybody know who and why you judged, in your own privacy. vs. in public, picking a person, facing possible rejection and embarrassment. // << “I’m on Tinder, Happn, Hinge, OkCupid,” Nick says. “It’s just a numbers game. Before, I could go out to a bar and talk to one girl, but now I can sit home on Tinder and talk to 15 girls—” - vnty.fr/1KTucX7
sociology  Online  Dating  Dating  Psychology  Tinder  OkCupid  Match.com  humanity  Love  Alain  de  Botton  philosophy  Millennials  mobile  phone  mobile  homescreen  user  behaviour  friction  frictionless 
august 2015 by asterisk2a
The South Korean Love Industry - YouTube
avg marriage age in SK is 31yrs. // prostitution illegal, but still thriving ... 1/5th of women worked in some form in the sex trade ...
demographic  bubble  demographics  demography  ageing  population  South  Korea  sex  work  sex  worker  sex  trade  culture  social  safety  net  poverty  in  old  age  sex  ed  sex  education  conservative  history  Asia  Love  Motel  sexual  health 
february 2015 by asterisk2a
Dating while mentally ill: When to tell the guy about my condition?
On one hand, I am the most self-confident I have ever been. On the other hand, the tangle of depression, anxiety, OCD, and borderline personality disorder in my head came fairly close to talking me into a swan dive off of a fifth-floor Paris balcony last week. (If you’ve never suffered from depression, it might sound nonsensical that I would do this at my most self-confident. If there’s one thing I know about depression, though, it’s that it’s devoid of logic, and you can feel your lowest and your highest all at once.)
mental  illness  mental  health  stigma  relationship  relationships  Intimate  relationship  partnerships  partners  partner  love  public  awareness  public  perception  public  opinion  public  discourse 
february 2015 by asterisk2a
Planet Wissen │Die Liebe - YouTube
erwartungen, und sozialer stellenwert von liebe, und heirat, steigende Scheidungsrate, ... und secularism hat Religion mit Liebe ersetzt. --- & youtube.com/watch?v=McARZVdODmY & youtube.com/watch?v=hCoyhEqyTrE
Intimate  relationship  relationship  relationships  Beziehung  book  Richard  David  Precht  love  secularism 
november 2014 by asterisk2a
Mit Sexualität umgehen lernen | SWR1 Leute - YouTube
from min 13:30 - // Beziehungen koennen todgeschwiegen werden. // min 22 - asexuality - platonische beziehungen (polygamy?) // trust in partner & body image - affects intimate relationship quality // wertevermittlung von TopModel - values in people // << innerlich unfrei macht << closed in - superficial // wide accessibility of Porn - consequences unkown - muss man problematisieren - ie misinformation etc. //
sex  ed  sex  education  sexuality  sexual  health  sexualität  childhood  childhood  development  psychology  sociology  Intimate  relationship  intimacy  love  asexual  sex  work  sex  worker  Prostitution  body  image  beauty  sickness  beauty  standard  Values  personal  status  anxiety  social  status  socioeconomic  status  extrovert  introvert  Porn  Pornography  LGBT  LGBTQIA 
october 2014 by asterisk2a
How Relationships Refine Our Truths: Adrienne Rich on the Dignity of Love | Brain Pickings
"An honorable human relationship — that is, one in which two people have the right to use the word 'love' — is a process, delicate, violent, often terrifying to both persons involved, a process of refining the truths they can tell each other." How relationships refine our truths – Adrienne Rich on the dignity of love
love  relationship  partnerships  partners  relationships 
august 2013 by asterisk2a
Ein wunderbarer Liebesroman | Kulturjournal | NDR - YouTube
German

- being understood is something great. everyone strives for to be understood.
Martin  Walsers  life  relationships  love  lifelesson  book  novel 
october 2012 by asterisk2a
The myth of Psyche — Paulo Coelho's Blog
love is an act of faith in another person, and her face shall stay covered in mystery.

Each moment shall be lived and enjoyed, but whenever we try to understand it, the magic disappears.

[...]

trust in Love, even running the risk of erring.

[...]

who sought to find safety in knowledge, found insecurity.

Those who don’t accept it and always seek an explanation for the magic and mysterious, human relations will lose the best of what life has to offer.
PauloCoelho  marriage  love  relationship  relationships  lifelessons  life 
august 2012 by asterisk2a
The Downside of Cohabiting Before Marriage - NYTimes.com
Couples who cohabit before marriage (and especially before an engagement or an otherwise clear commitment) tend to be less satisfied with their marriages — and more likely to divorce — than couples who do not. These negative outcomes are called the cohabitation effect.

The majority of young adults in their 20s will live with a romantic partner at least once, and more than half of all marriages will be preceded by cohabitation. This shift has been attributed to the sexual revolution and the availability of birth control, and in our current economy, sharing the bills makes cohabiting appealing. But when you talk to people in their 20s, you also hear about something else: cohabitation as prophylaxis.

ie You would only marry someone if he or she agreed to live together with you first, so that you could find out whether you really get along.

But that belief is contradicted by experience.
The "gradual slope" of relationships makes the couple bypass talking about why & what is happening
love  convenience  lifelessons  change  Behavior  behavioral  economics  culture  psychology  gender  asymmetry  single  gender  study  advice  relationship  marriage  relationships 
april 2012 by asterisk2a
"Abfallprodukt der Elternliebe" - Freie Presse
"Abfallprodukt der Elternliebe"
Magazin: Richard David Precht hält Liebe für "Unfall der Evolution"
Hamburg (dapd). Der Autor Richard David Precht sieht in geschlechtlicher Liebe einen "Unfall der Evolution". "Biologisch betrachtet ist Liebe Unsinn", sagte der Philosoph und Schriftsteller der Zeitschrift "Für Sie" laut einem Vorabbericht. Sie sei ein "Abfallprodukt der Elternliebe", fügte der 47-Jährige hinzu.
Genau das sei auch der Grund, warum Frauen sich so häufig in die falschen Männer verliebten. "Wir suchen in der Liebe zwei Zutaten, die eigentlich nicht miteinander vereinbar sind. Vertrauen und Geborgenheit auf der einen Seite, Aufregung auf der anderen Seite", sagte Precht. Dies sei aber nicht möglich. "Mit den Menschen, bei denen Sie sich am geborgensten fühlen, wollen Sie nicht ins Bett; und die, die Sie am meisten erregen, halten Sie auf Dauer nicht aus", sagte der Autor.
book  love  evolution 
february 2012 by asterisk2a
What Falling in Love Does to the Brain - Yahoo! News
"Intense passionate love uses the same system in the brain that gets activated when a person is addicted to drugs," said study co-author Arthur Aron, a psychologist at the State University of New York at Stony Brook.
In other words, you start to crave the person you're in love with like a drug.

The researchers found that in each of these long-term lovers, brain regions were also activated when they looked at photos of their partners. Long-term love showed activity in the regions linked with attachment and liking a reward.
"For most people, the standard pattern is a gradual decline of passionate love, but a growth in bonding," Aron said.
relationships  research  brain  love  addiction 
february 2012 by asterisk2a
Love You! Now, the Difficult Stuff - NYTimes.com
“Remember that ‘make believe’ and ‘happily ever after’ are Hollywood concepts, and there is absolutely nothing magical about a divorce.”

So, what issues should couples, both gay or straight, discuss before walking down the aisle?

“Companies have a mission statement so customers can see what the values of the company are, and so its purpose is clearly communicated,” said Nancy B. Irwin, a psychotherapist in Los Angeles. Those about to marry should, too, she said.

“A couple’s relationship values have to be aligned for it to go the distance.” She suggested, however, that couples avoid making an agreement too businesslike, and opt instead for the scented candle approach of writing what she called a “relationship vision statement.”

“Most people only think of the best moments — the fairy tale where every family member is totally healthy,”
advice  sociology  prenuptial  agreement  relationships  love  marriage 
february 2012 by asterisk2a
Sex and love: The modern matchmakers | The Economist
the data suggest people are not good at knowing what they want. One of Dr Finkel’s own studies, for example, showed that when they are engaged in internet dating’s cousin, speed dating, people’s stated preferences at the beginning of the process do not well match the characters of the individuals they actually like.

Not surprisingly, the difficulty of choosing from abundance seems to apply to choice of people, too.

But speed-dating once again provided an answer. Here, he found studies which showed that when faced with abundant choice, people pay less attention to characteristics that require thinking and conversation to evaluate (occupational status and level of education, for example) and more to matters physical. Choice, in other words, dulls the critical faculties.
internet  dating  dating  choice  psychology  love  sociology  marriage  relationships 
february 2012 by asterisk2a
Stay Or Leave? Book says you can work out whether he's Mr Right, or just Mr Right Now | Mail Online
Step 1: Start being yourself, not the person everyone else wants you to be
Step 2: Don’t worry what others think
Step 3: Resolve your split personality
Step 4: You’re not as trapped as you think you are
Step 5: Live by your own values
Step 6: Consider what you’d do if you knew you had only six months to live
lifelessons  lifehacker  lifehacks  life-style  life  love  advice  relationships  relationship 
january 2012 by asterisk2a
Liebeskummerexpertin Silvia Fauck | NDR.de - Fernsehen - Sendungen A - Z - NDR Talk Show - Videos
Was tun bei einem gebrochenen Herzen? Silvia Fauck ist psychologische Beraterin und hat sich auf Liebeskummer spezialisiert - mit großem Erfolg.
emancipation  brokenheartsyndrome  partner  partnerships  love  society  marriage  Liebeskummer  Emanzipation  psychology 
june 2011 by asterisk2a
Technology Provides an Alternative to Love. - NYTimes.com
Let me toss out the idea that, as our markets discover and respond to what consumers most want, our technology has become extremely adept at creating products that correspond to our fantasy ideal of an erotic relationship, in which the beloved object asks for nothing and gives everything, instantly, and makes us feel all powerful, and doesn’t throw terrible scenes when it’s replaced by an even sexier object and is consigned to a drawer.
To speak more generally, the ultimate goal of technology, the telos of techne, is to replace a natural world that’s indifferent to our wishes — a world of hurricanes and hardships and breakable hearts, a world of resistance — with a world so responsive to our wishes as to be, effectively, a mere extension of the self.

Let me suggest, finally, that the world of techno-consumerism is therefore troubled by real love, and that it has no choice but to trouble love in turn.
technology  culture  love  society  iphone  advertising  relationships 
may 2011 by asterisk2a

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