Friendship   17827

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See Like Me - kashmir - Stargate Atlantis [Archive of Our Own]
In which Rodney's world view is skewed, Ronon reads Greek tragedies, Teyla starts hanging out in the labs and John pouts (a little).
f:sga  team!fic  p:rodney/john  friendship  competence!kink 
yesterday by miss_speller
Magic In the Stars - NephilimEQ - Stargate Atlantis [Archive of Our Own]
John Sheppard and Rodney McKay are seventh years at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. As a pair of unlikely best friends, John soon figures out that his friend is hiding something from him. But what could it be?
au  hogwarts  f:sga  f:hp  crossover  friendship  fluff  pre.ship  p:rodney/john 
2 days ago by miss_speller
Where to Start Over and How to Begin - lilyfarfalla - Stargate Atlantis [Archive of Our Own]
Post-Season 5, Atlantis is stuck on Earth. Teyla realizes she has to create the path to take Atlantis home. With the help of Woolsey, Ronon, John and Rodney, she’s wildly successful, but somewhere along the way, Rodney and John get a little lost.  flangst  l:atlantis  oblivious  f:sga  p:rodney/john  pre.ship  friendship  team!fic  l:offworld  independent.atlantis 
4 days ago by miss_speller
How to Make Friends, According to Science - The Atlantic
How to Make Friends, According to Science
To begin, don’t dismiss the humble acquaintance.


“What are friends for?” This isn’t a rhetorical question. Friendship is one of life’s most important features, and one too often taken for granted.

The human desire for companionship may feel boundless, but research suggests that our social capital is finite—we can handle only so many relationships at one time. Social scientists have used a number of ingenious approaches to gauge the size of people’s social networks; these have returned estimates ranging from about 250 to about 5,500 people. [1] (An undergraduate thesis from MIT focusing exclusively on Franklin D. Roosevelt, a friendly guy with an especially social job, suggested that he might have had as many as 22,500 acquaintances. [2]) Looking more specifically at friendship, a study using the exchange of Christmas cards as a proxy for closeness put the average person’s friend group at about 121 people. [3]

However vast our networks may be, our inner circle tends to be much smaller. The average American trusts only 10 to 20 people. [4] Moreover, that number may be shrinking: From 1985 to 2004, the average number of confidants that people reported having decreased from three to two. [5] This is both sad and consequential, because people who have strong social relationships tend to live longer than those who don’t. [6]

Two women hugging and laughing at the camera
How Friends Become Closer

What Makes Us Happy, Revisited

How Friendships Change in Adulthood

Puppy Cuteness Is Perfectly Timed to Manipulate Humans
So what should you do if your social life is lacking? Here, too, the research is instructive. To begin with, don’t dismiss the humble acquaintance. Even interacting with people with whom one has weak social ties has a meaningful influence on well-being. [7] Beyond that, building deeper friendships may be largely a matter of putting in time. A recent study out of the University of Kansas found that it takes about 50 hours of socializing to go from acquaintance to casual friend, an additional 40 hours to become a “real” friend, and a total of 200 hours to become a close friend. [8]

If that sounds like too much effort, reviving dormant social ties can be especially rewarding. Reconnected friends can quickly recapture much of the trust they previously built, while offering each other a dash of novelty drawn from whatever they’ve been up to in the meantime. [9] And if all else fails, you could start randomly confiding in people you don’t know that well in hopes of letting the tail wag the relational dog. Self-disclosure makes us more likable, and as a bonus, we are more inclined to like those to whom we have bared our soul. [10]

The academic literature is clear: Longing for closeness and connection is pervasive. Which suggests that most of us are stumbling through the world pining for companionship that could be easily provided by the lonesome stumblers all around us. So set aside this article (after you’ve renewed your subscription and clicked every ad on the website, of course), turn to someone nearby, and try to make a friend. You both could probably use one.

The Studies:

[1] Freeman and Thompson, “Estimating Acquaintanceship Volume,” in The Small World (Ablex, 1989)

[2] Rosenthal, “Acquaintances and Contacts of Franklin Roosevelt” (MIT, 1960)

[3] Hill and Dunbar, “Social Network Size in Humans” (Human Nature, March 2003)

[4] DiPrete et al., “Segregation in Social Networks Based on Acquaintanceship and Trust” (American Journal of Sociology, Jan. 2011)

[5] McPherson et al., “Social Isolation in America” (American Sociological Review, June 2006)

[6] Holt-Lunstad et al., “Social Relationships and Mortality Risk” (PLoS Medicine, July 2010)

[7] Sandstrom and Dunn, “Social Interactions and Well-Being” (Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, July 2014)

[8] Hall, “How Many Hours Does It Take to Make a Friend?” (Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, March 2018)

[9] Levin et al., “Dormant Ties” (Organization Science, July–Aug. 2011)

[10] Collins and Miller, “Self-Disclosure and Liking” (Psychological Bulletin, Nov. 1994)

This article appears in the September 2018 print edition with the headline “Make Old Friends.”
friendship  friends  psychology 
4 days ago by enochko
Under the Covers
"Steve is (maybe) a little bit still in love with Nancy Wheeler and (maybe) trying to figure himself out-- between the night terrors and the babysitting and the general weirdness that is Hawkins, Indiana-- before he graduates. Billy Hargrove fits in there somewhere (probably)." (87,788 words)
steve_harrington  billy_hargrove  steve/billy  ptsd!steveharrington  hurt!steveharrington  pining!steveharrington  hurt!billy  abused!billy  pov:steveharrington  hurt/comfort  friendship  angst  ptsd  recovery  abuse:child  pining  slowburn  preslash  fandom:strangerthings  author:toastranger 
4 days ago by elwarre
Commentary: Women's Friendships Hold Them Back in Careers | Fortune
I realized that despite the cultural moment female friendship is currently enjoying, the same strength, intensity, and deep connections being celebrated was also setting up a false dichotomy between personal relationships and the transactionality of business.

Women told me that when they asked a friend for business, they feared it would damage their personal relationships, took rejection personally, and became gun-shy about making another pitch. Even well-qualified women who had no qualms about asking (and were quite adept at it) were often met with avoidance, a brush-off, or no reply at all.

Women - who are able to successfully transact business with personal friends - do these things:

1. Ask how you can help (get specific, actionable responses) every time you meet with a woman—socially or professionally.
2. Recommend friends to friends (intentionally promoting each other as experts, leaders, and business resources).
3. Seek women out—don’t wait to be approached.
4. Take the meeting and play matchmaker. Even if you don’t have a pressing need, introduce her to a relevant contact in your network who does.
mallun-yen  friendship  career-advice  women-and-work 
8 days ago by yolandaenoch
The Pegasus Galaxy School of Massage - Sholio - Stargate Atlantis [Archive of Our Own]
"You think you've seen everything in Pegasus," John said musingly. "And then you realize there are untold depths of weirdness still to be explored." An episode tag for 5x03, "Broken Ties", that ... grew.
team!fic  episode.tag  friendship  massage  f:sga  l:atlantis  c:ronon.dex 
9 days ago by miss_speller
Stargate Atlantis Fanfic: Plumber's Helper
The location of the local bathroom facilities had not been the first thing that Elizabeth Weir had considered when she first walked through the Stargate. It hadn't been the second, third or twenty-fifth thing, either. There had been, to say the least, no shortage of other things to worry about. It wasn't until Sumner, Sheppard and the rest of the exploratory team had departed through the gate, leaving the rest of them in a city in eminent danger of flooding, that someone had first raised the issue.
gen  s1  friendship  f:sga  c:rodney.mckay  c:john.sheppard 
9 days ago by miss_speller
Time Isn't Real
"Adam wakes up in the future, learns a few things about himself, about time, and about his priorities. But mostly he just wishes that Time was doing it's job better." (87,737 words)
adam_parrish  ronan_lynch  blue_sargent  richard_gansey  adam/ronan  blue/gansey  clueless!adam  bamf!adam  timetraveler!adam  pining!ronan  drama  action  friendship  timetravel  magic  first_time  established!relationship  fandom:ravencycle  author:spiritsflame 
10 days ago by elwarre

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