yolandaenoch + children   7

A Modest Proposal for Equalizing the Mental Load - The New York Times
While you can work to more equitably distribute the actual tasks, that low-key anxiety is going to be tougher to share because of societal expectations of mothers, said Susan Walzer, a professor of sociology at Skidmore College who discussed the term “worry work” in a 1996 paper called “Thinking About the Baby.” The mothers Dr. Walzer interviewed in her research spent more time worrying about being good mothers than the fathers worried about being good fathers.
jessica-grose  nytimes.com  parenting  parental-leave  mental-load  emotional-labor  susan-walzer  parenthood  children 
9 weeks ago by yolandaenoch
The Mother of All Questions
As it happens, there are many reasons why I don’t have children: I am very good at birth control; though I love children and adore aunthood, I also love solitude; I was raised by unhappy, unkind people, and I wanted neither to replicate their form of parenting nor to create human beings who might feel about me the way that I felt about my begetters; I really wanted to write books, which as I’ve done it is a fairly consuming vocation. I’m not dogmatic about not having kids. I might have had them under other circumstances and been fine — as I am now. // But just because the question can be answered doesn’t mean that I ought to answer it, or that it ought to be asked. // we are given a single story line about what makes a good life, even though not a few who follow that story line have bad lives. //
rebecca-solnit  women-issues  family  children  edward-snowden 
january 2016 by yolandaenoch
Children don't ruin women's careers — husbands do, Harvard study finds
If you are devoted to your career goals and would like a man who will support that, you’re just doing what men throughout the ages have done: placing a safe bet. // It’s not because they’re “opting out” of the workforce when they have kids, but because they’re allowing their partners’ careers to take precedence over their own. // Of course, marital arrangements aren’t the only force holding women back. Part of the reason these women aren’t advancing at the same rate as their male counterparts is that after they have kids, they get “mommy-tracked.” // Take a look at the current crop of female CEOs: A lot of them have husbands who don’t work. Xerox CEO Ursula Burns took a page out of Hirshman’s book and joked at a 2013 conference, “The secret [to success] is to marry someone 20 years older.” Her husband retired as she was hitting her career stride, allowing him to take primary responsibility for their kids.
relationships  marriage  harvard-business-review  career-advice  children  parenting 
january 2016 by yolandaenoch

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