opalsong + extra:pretend!relationship   81

turkey pie kiss firework
Your conversation with your mom is less informative than your conversation with your sister. You text:
> Hey so are you kicking me out of the house for Thanksgiving or what
She responds:
> Dont put it like that
> But yes
> Hv fun w/the gberts!
Followed by a series of emoji: a turkey, a pie, a kiss, and a firework.
fanwork  fandom:Polygon  pairing:Brian/Pat  rating:r  Length:LongShot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:strongandlovestofic  quality:sunfish  extra:slowbuild  extra:holiday  extra:roadtrip  extra:family  extra:firsttime  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:podficced! 
june 2019 by opalsong
Partners, Parents, or None of the Above
Kenny's mom assuming that Diego and Klaus were A) a couple and B) Number 5's parents was both bemusing and amusing at the time. But that was because it was the only time it had ever happened. Now though? Now they just can't understand why these misunderstandings keep happening.
fanwork  fandom:UmbrellaAcademy  pairing:gen  rating:pg-13  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:DarkFairytale  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:humour 
april 2019 by opalsong
we’ll make a brand new start of it (in old new york)
“Just to be clear,” Andrew says. “You want me to pretend to be your boyfriend at a party to spite your high school bully and your high school girlfriend and possibly the entire state of Ohio?”

Steven giggles. “Spite’s such a harsh word. Shock and impress, maybe.”

“For a man of faith you’re being awfully morally flexible about this,” Andrew says.
fanwork  fandom:WorthIt  pairing:Steven/Andrew  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:misantlery  quality:sunfish  extra:holiday  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:firsttime 
april 2019 by opalsong
Two Truths And A Lie
Mikoto does not want her elderly relatives trying to pick out her future husband.

Kushina has a brilliant idea.

(Oh no... she's hot.)
fanwork  Fandom:Naruto  pairing:Kushina/Mikoto  rating:G  time:0:00-5:00  Type:PodFic  site:AO3  author:Sanjuno  performer:Arioch  quality:salamander  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:au  extra:ForMe!  extra:ITPE2018 
january 2019 by opalsong
Two Truths And A Lie
Mikoto does not want her elderly relatives trying to pick out her future husband.

Kushina has a brilliant idea.

(Oh no... she's hot.)
fanwork  Fandom:Naruto  pairing:Kushina/Mikoto  rating:G  length:oneshot  Length:Short  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Sanjuno  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:au  extra:modern  extra:friendship 
december 2018 by opalsong
from the moon's brink
“Thank you,” he says, and the words feel like they don’t fit right in his mouth. What are you supposed to say, really, when someone gives you a piece of their spirit-form? Especially under these circumstances. Shisui wishes treason came with some kind of manual. Maybe a book full of helpful hints. When plotting to overturn decades of hatred and stop a war by lying to the whole world, be careful not to offend the man giving you his teeth to wear as earrings.
fanwork  Fandom:Naruto  pairing:Kakashi/Shisui  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:blackkat  quality:sunfish  Extra:MagicalCreature  extra:politics  extra:marriageofconvenience  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:au  extra:toPodfic  extra:wishList 
december 2018 by opalsong
we're either a romance novel or a cheap teen drama
Kurenai looks thoughtful. “So you want help picking someone who will annoy him?”

“I want help picking someone who will give him an aneurism,” Asuma corrects, because he’s always been a fan of go big or go home.

“Pissing off the mayor seems like a bad idea,” Raidō ventures after a moment, but he’s already looking around the lunchroom, scanning for targets.

Asuma snorts. “I'm not pissing off the mayor, I'm pissing off my father,” he says. “Despite what he wants to think, there is a difference.”
fanwork  Fandom:Naruto  pairing:Asuma/Hidan  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:blackkat  quality:sunfish  extra:au  Extra:HighSchool  extra:modern  extra:humour  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:toPodfic  extra:wishList 
december 2018 by opalsong
I’m Gonna Keep You in Love with Me (for a While)
Shane is pacing around the hotel room. It’s not a huge room and Shane’s legs are long enough that he doesn’t have much real estate to pace before he has to swing back around for another loop.

“Can you stop?” Ryan asks. “You’re making me dizzy.”

“Okay,” Shane says finally. “Okay. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’re just going to—we’re going to be married. The only way out is through.”

“Um,” Ryan says, because this plan strikes him as counterproductive to their shared goal of not being married.
fanwork  fandom:Unsolved  pairing:Shane/Ryan  rating:nc-17  Length:LongShot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:beethechange  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:drinking  extra:accidentalmarriage  extra:friendship  Extra:Failboats!inLove 
june 2018 by opalsong
“Since being the scene of those two, grisly double homicides in the early 1950’s, the Bringle House Bed and Breakfast has sat empty, waiting for the next couple stupid enough to try to stay all four nights.”

“That’s us then? The couple stupid enough?”

“Apparently,” Ryan said to the camera. TJ, one hand on the side of the lens, smirked, and Ryan quickly continued with, “now, we may not have any actual couples on Unsolved, but we figured the ghosts won’t be able to tell the difference if there are two people sleeping here.”

“Yeah, if ghosts want to kill someone, they’re probably not looking at the fine print to decide what kind of couple their victims are,” Shane said. “Because we are, obviously, a couple.”


“A couple of ghosthunters.”

He winked dramatically at the left-most camera, and Ryan shook his head.

“You realize you just admitted to being a ghosthunter, right?”

(Or; Ryan and Shane spend four nights in one haunted house—four nights twisting closer to either each other, or insanity)
fanwork  fandom:Unsolved  pairing:Shane/Ryan  rating:r  Length:LongShot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:suggcest  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
june 2018 by opalsong
A Missed Adventure
Nami would like to say that no one ever spoke of the incident again. This might be the case, if it wasn't for the part where Zoro's new nickname was 'First Wife.'
fanwork  fandom:OnePiece  pairing:gen  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  Length:Short  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Methoxyethane  quality:salamander  extra:humour  extra:crack  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
december 2017 by opalsong
a thousand miles up and we're about to get higher
There's a man hiding in the eaves of his porch.

Sakumo blinks, tips his head, but the image doesn’t change. A shinobi in a Konoha uniform has somehow managed to stuff himself into the corner of the roof, entirely out of sight from practically everywhere except the spot Sakumo is currently standing.

"Can I help you?" he asks bemusedly.
fanwork  Fandom:Naruto  pairing:Orochimaru/Sakumo  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:blackkat  quality:sunfish  extra:humour  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
november 2017 by opalsong
Whatever It Takes
Bakugou Katsuki, in typical fashion, makes a brash decision that changes his life irrevocably. Anger has always had a way of bringing Bakugou what he wants, though. He just hadn't realized dating someone would be so fucking difficult.

(Or, that one where Bakugou agrees to pretend to date Todoroki just to piss off Endeavor, and ends up falling in love instead.)
fanwork  fandom:MyHeroAcademia  pairing:Todoroki/Bakugo  rating:nc-17  Length:LongShot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:XenophonSpeaks  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Failboats!inLove  extra:teenboyskissing 
november 2017 by opalsong
crust and sugar over
Katsuki sits cross-legged, clearly in no hurry to go anywhere. “What’s your name? I’m –”

“I know who you are,” he cuts him off, then blushes, then hates himself for both those things. Katsuki looks surprised, and Yuri can’t think as to why. He’s a nationally ranked figure skater. He’s Yuri’s favorite figure skater.


Yuuri and Yuri become friends and Viktor develops a crush.
fanwork  fandom:YuriOnIce  pairing:Yuuri/Victor  rating:pg-13  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:ShanaStoryteller  quality:crocodile  extra:friendship  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Failboats!inLove  extra:podficced! 
august 2017 by opalsong
Daily Dose: Sasagawa Chronicles
A collection of my short writing warm up pieces that I try to write every day on my tumblr. These ones are specifically about Ryouhei and Kyoko- the Sasagawas! Lots of different ships and whatever. It's mostly cute, probably v little angst. And I'll update it abt once a week with what's been posted to tumblr the week previous.
fanwork  pairing:Mukuro/Chrome/Ryouhei  pairing:gen  pairing:Kyouya/Ryouhei  rating:pg-13  length:series  type:prose  site:AO3  author:RyMagnatar  quality:sunfish  extra:friendship  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:fluff  extra:humour  fandom:KHR 
july 2017 by opalsong
With or Without You
Derek thinks that the mating rituals are overly romanticized bullshit, but claiming a mate and defending them from challengers is something werewolves do, and his pack can't afford to appear weak after the fire. Especially not when Deucalion and his friends are in town for the rituals. Enter Stiles Stilinski, who offers to let Derek claim him so he won't be overrun at the ceremonies. Nothing goes as expected.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  pairing:Boyd/Erica  pairing:Isaac/Cora  pairing:Laura/OC  rating:pg-13  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:KouriArashi  quality:sunfish  extra:au  extra:mate  extra:matchmaking  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:politics  extra:family  extra:slowbuild 
july 2017 by opalsong
Business Dealing Special Methods
A tricky business meeting requires less than ordinary ways of dressing and acting. Afterwards, Gokudera is shocked, and Hibari takes his revenge in the most pleasurable way.
fanwork  rating:nc-17  pairing:Kyouya/Dino  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Lumelle  quality:salamander  Extra:BDSM  Extra:Toys  extra:begging  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  fandom:KHR 
may 2017 by opalsong
Follow Every Highway
Jupiter Jones needs a green card. Caine Wise needs a place to live. What's a little marriage of convenience, between strangers?

AU based on the movie Green Card.
fanwork  fandom:JupiterAscending  pairing:Jupiter/Caine  rating:nc-17  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:gallifreyburning  quality:crocodile  extra:slowbuild  extra:au  extra:marriageofconvenience  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:BDSM  extra:praisekink  extra:femdom 
may 2017 by opalsong
Where Else Would We Want to Go
Three years is a long time to fake-date your friend as a favor. Flower, Véro, and Sid maybe need this pointed out for them.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  pairing:Flower/Vero/Sid  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:withershins  quality:sunfish  extra:poly  extra:au  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
march 2017 by opalsong
Best We (never actually) Had
Bull is on the worst blind date with Trevor Trevelyan, and Dorian swoops in, pretending to be his ex that wants to get back together.
fanwork  fandom:dragonage  pairing:IronBull/Dorian  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Heronfem  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:au 
december 2016 by opalsong
a sequence that you never learned
"'Spock,' Jim breathes out, completely overwhelmed by the gesture—not quite believing that Spock knows him so well, that's he's already started researching, that he trusts Jim with a member of his own endangered species."

When Jim gets it in his head to adopt an eight year old Vulcan, Spock presents a logical solution to the issue of Jim's humanity: marriage to a Vulcan citizen.
fanwork  Fandom:StarTrek  Pairing:Kirk/Spock  rating:nc-17  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:annataylor  quality:crocodile  Extra:Kid!Fic  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Marriage  extra:firsttime 
december 2016 by opalsong
American Pride
The press seems to think Tony and Steve are in a relationship, and so many people seem so happy about it that Steve just runs with it, dragging Tony along. To a Pride rally.

Whoever gave Steve that flag he's wrapped himself in deserves a medal.
fanwork  fandom:avengers  pairing:tony/steve  rating:pg-13  length:series  type:prose  site:AO3  author:imafriendlydalek  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:politics  extra:queer 
december 2016 by opalsong
The Gentlest Chains
Beyond that door is a boy Sid has skated with six times, and spoken to twice. He’s a year older than Sid is, and drugged out of his mind on Bonding agent.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  pairing:Sid/Geno  pairing:Mario/Jagr/Nathalie  pairing:Ovechink/Semin  rating:r  length:series  type:prose  site:AO3  author:LadyJanelly  quality:sunfish  extra:bond  extra:rape  extra:au  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:family  extra:poly  Extra:HighSchool  extra:firsttime 
december 2016 by opalsong
All's Fair in Orgasms and War
"We haven't seen much of our favorite rock hard stud from Hale House ever since that indie twink dethroned him as champion in Orgasm Wars, but it's just been confirmed that Diamond will no longer be working for the legendary studio famous for producing some of our favorite werewolf-on-human works. Don't fret, Diamond fans, it looks like he's been spotted cozying up to True Alpha Studios! Apparently he couldn't get enough of that one human and then followed him home. Could it be true love? Keep your eye on this studio-- us at AVN think we're about to get a lot more of Diamond in a very new way!"
The one in which (almost) everyone is a porn star, and Derek just wants to curl up with his fluffy blanket and watch the Hallmark channel, but work and falling in love gets in the way.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:nc-17  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:bleep0bleep  quality:sunfish  extra:au  extra:porn  extra:knotting  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Voyeurism  extra:exhibitionism  extra:bottom!Derek  extra:demisexual  Extra:Toys  extra:publicsex 
january 2016 by opalsong
Comfortable Territory
“Shit, man, you’ve got your eye on someone? Who is it? Do I know her? What’s the hold up?” Shitty asks.

Jack furrows his brow, confused. “Uh, what? Shitty, no, there’s no girl-”

“A guy?” Shitty interrupts, clearly having entirely missed the point. Jack opens his mouth to point his out, but Shitty beats him to it. “Oh, shit. Bitty?”
fanwork  fandom:CheckPlease!  pairing:Bitty/Jack  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:accidentallymelted  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
january 2016 by opalsong
Bells Are Ringing
"Oh bloody fucking DAMN!" Sherlock shouted, apropos of nothing. John nearly dropped his tea.

John turned and found Sherlock shaking his passport. "Mycroft made me French!"
fanwork  fandom:Sherlock  pairing:Sherlock/John  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Basingstoke  quality:sunfish  Extra:Marriage  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
january 2016 by opalsong
The Predatory Wasp
Five years without any contact was a long time. The distance had built new walls on top of old wounds. They were still best friends, maybe, but did they really know each other anymore? In an ideal situation, they'd spend some time alone, maybe go on a few small adventures. Take it slow. Rediscover what drew them to each other in the first place.

But Killua had officially decided that the situation was not ideal. In fact, it was so much the opposite that he was going to have an enormous hickey on the inside of his elbow.

Because instead of taking things slow, they were pretending to make out in a closet.
fanwork  fandom:HunterxHunter  pairing:Gon/Killua  rating:r  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:silvercistern  quality:salamander  extra:future  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
january 2016 by opalsong
Kakashi and Iruka's superiors find out that they're together, except they're actually not. Based on this prompt: Kakashi helps Iruka out of a tight spot in Konoha. (Unwanted advances? Bullying?)
fanwork  Fandom:Naruto  Pairing:Kakashi/Iruka  rating:r  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:megyal  quality:salamander  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
august 2015 by opalsong
A Delicate Arrangement
Dorian's parents come to Skyhold to take him away based on a deal Dorian and his father made a long time ago that if Dorian was not in a relationship by a certain age, Halward could marry him to Livia Herathinos. No questions asked.

Cullen only sees one way to ensure his chess partner stays in Skyhold. They only need to fake being in a relationship long enough to get Dorian's parents out of Skyhold anyway. How hard could it be to complete the Tevinter courtship rituals?
fanwork  fandom:dragonage  pairing:Dorian/Cullen  pairing:Warden/Zevran  rating:unrated  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:TheLadyMagician  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:slowbuild  extra:courtship  extra:fluff 
august 2015 by opalsong
The State of Marriage
The State of Marriage by iBear read aloud. 3hrs20mins.

Geno will always love his country.

Even if it doesn't always love him back.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  pairing:Sid/Geno  rating:pg-13  time:3:00:00-4:00:00  Type:PodFic  site:AO3  author:iBear  performer:lunchy_munchy  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:comingout  quality:whale 
september 2014 by opalsong
Play Nice
"It's a match made in high society heaven." Tim drawls. "Also, it's your turn to make dinner tonight, you should get on that."
fanwork  fandom:dccomics  pairing:Tim/Jason  rating:G  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:heartslogos  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
september 2014 by opalsong
Behind this Wall of Metaphors
In which KStew and Tazer meet in a bar, hookup, becoming bros who bone, talk about their gay crushes, and begin fake dating in an attempt to make said gay crushes jealous. Mostly in that order.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  Fandom:RPS  pairing:Tazer/KStew  pairing:Tazer/Kaner  pairing:KStew/ChalizeTheron  rating:nc-17  Length:LongShot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:cherryvanilla  author:impertinence  quality:sunfish  extra:friendship  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
april 2014 by opalsong
pretending to be married, Derek/Stiles :-D
Derek can handle this. He can.

“You can do this,” he says, to his pale and pinched-looking reflection, to the faint bags under his eyes and the tension creases at the corners of his mouth. If he says it enough times it’ll stick sooner or later.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:tumblr  author:queerly_it_is  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:au  extra:flatscan 
april 2014 by opalsong
the answer is always threesomes

Anyone can feel free to write me a story where everyone has to go to the Pacific Northwest Werewolf Symposium and Derek explains it would be BAD FORM for an Alpha to turn up without a mate, especially the ONLY TRUE ALPHA IN A HUNDRED YEARS, and its not like Scott can bring KIRA because duhhhh foxes and wolves don’t get along. Stiles sucks in a breath because he loves this shit, he’s gonna get his FAKE BOYFRIEND on when Derek says, quiet, “I can—you know, stand in.”
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek/Scott  rating:nc-17  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:drunktuesdays  author:Febricant  author:scoutshonor  quality:sunfish  extra:not!fic  Extra:Threesome/Moresome  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
april 2014 by opalsong
The Firm Hand of the Law
Shawn goes undercover at a BDSM club and runs into Lassiter. He assumes Lassiter is undercover as well. He's wrong.
fanwork  fandom:psych  pairing:Shawn/Lassi  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:plainapple  quality:sunfish  Extra:BDSM  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Toys  extra:dirtyTalk  extra:publicsex 
march 2014 by opalsong
Play Along
"I bet you a hundred bucks," Sharpy says, gesturing with his drink to punctuate how very serious he is about this suggestion, "that I can pick up the next person who walks in that door before you can."

Duncan Keith probably shouldn't have taken that bet.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  pairing:Duncs/Seabs  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:shihadchick  quality:sunfish  extra:bet  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Failboats!inLove 
march 2014 by opalsong
All My Loves
Stiles figured the mission would be difficult. There was only one person Deaton knew of who could save Derek's life, but that man - Druid Bruce Monroe - hated Deaton with a passion. Getting into Bruce's good graces would take more than a few lies and a well-placed grin. He, Scott, and Allison would have to go undercover as a married triad, just to get the druid to talk to them. Stiles figured the hardest part of the mission would be keeping their true identities a secret. Boy, was he wrong. It turns out the hardest part is remembering that it's all pretend, and that Stiles isn't supposed to be in love with two of his best friends.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Scott/Allison/Stiles  rating:nc-17  type:prose  site:AO3  author:pterawaters  quality:salamander  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Threesome/Moresome  length:series 
december 2013 by opalsong
The Sweetest of Words (Have the Bitterest Taste)
“Ah, yeah, Desiree, I told you I was meeting someone. Well, that someone is Derek. My boyfriend. We’re totally in love.” His heart was racing and Derek was holding him so tight it was difficult to turn enough to face the young woman. What he did see of her had his breath catching on fishhooks in his throat. She was normally a relatively pretty girl, with cute round cheeks and large dark eyes, but in that moment she looked…terrifying. Her cheeks seemed gaunt, her eyes glowing like they were little windows peeking into a deep pit of raging flame.

(Or: Five or so years after the show. Stiles is in college, and finds himself getting stalked by a succubus. Derek's determined that the best way to thwart her is to prove that he and Stiles are madly in love. It's not really as much of an act as either seems to think.)
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Omni  quality:sunfish  Extra:Failboats!inLove  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
december 2013 by opalsong
We Tripped and Then We Fell Headlong
"Dude," Stiles is saying. "It's only going to work if you look like you don't hate me."
"I don't hate you," Derek grits out, and pulls Stiles uncomfortably close, until there is a knobbly elbow digging into his side.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:pg-13  time:10:00-30:00  Type:PodFic  site:livejournal  author:itachitachi  performer:araline  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  quality:sunfish 
october 2013 by opalsong
According to Plans
Five times Stiles and Derek pretend to be boyfriends, and the one time they didn't have to pretend at all. (Or: in which Stiles' plan for senior year is completely ruined by a supernatural creature stalking him.)
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:nc-17  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:eldee  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
september 2013 by opalsong
Electricity In the Contact
In which Derek has been invited to the Greater Pacific Northwest Alpha Symposium (that's not what it's called, Stiles, stop saying that), and showing up unattached would mean an arranged marriage. When the rest of the pack objects, he agrees to let Stiles come along to pose as his mate. Derek is reasonably sure that he's not going to make it out of this weekend alive.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:nc-17  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:ladyblahblah  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:knotting 
september 2013 by opalsong
Marry Me A Little
When NHL star Patrick Kane's off-ice antics finally get him into trouble for the last time, captain and best friend Jonathan Toews has one final trump card to keep him from being traded: marriage...to each other. But between being the first openly gay hockey players, facing down a lockout, and the fact that Patrick has been in love with Jonny for years, will these two ever be able to work past their miscommunication to realize that their marriage may not be as much of a sham as they think it is?

Written for the Harlequin Big Bang 2013.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  pairing:Tazer/Kaner  rating:nc-17  Length:BigBang  Length:Long  type:prose  site:AO3  author:thisissirius  author:bessyboo  artist:bessyboo  quality:sunfish  Extra:Marriage  extra:comingout  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
july 2013 by opalsong
Pretty In Tents
Even though he’s making fun of it, Stiles thinks the whole thing sounds awesome and, like most stuff these days, the experience is going to be totally wasted on Scott.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:r  time:30:00-1:00:00  Type:PodFic  site:AO3  author:kellifer_fic  performer:Janeyyy  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  quality:salamander 
may 2013 by opalsong
tied if we stay
It takes 140 characters or less and one absolute fucking moron to change Jon's entire life forever.

He should have known all along it would be Kaner. It always is.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  Fandom:RPS  rating:nc-17  pairing:Tazer/Kaner  Length:LongShot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:staraflur  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Failboats!inLove 
march 2013 by opalsong
The Hour of the Wolf
Stiles never wanted to be a werewolf, but the choice is taken out of his hands by a series of unfortunate events. When he wakes up his life has become infinitely more complicated.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:pg-13  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Suaine  quality:salamander  Extra:Werewolf  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Extra:Failboats!inLove 
march 2013 by opalsong
pretty in tents
Even though he’s making fun of it, Stiles thinks the whole thing sounds awesome and, like most stuff these days, the experience is going to be totally wasted on Scott.
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:r  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:kellifer_fic  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
march 2013 by opalsong
last night's dress (tiptoe out of this mess)
Written for a prompt on the kinkmeme.

TFLN: My dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for Sunday brunch next week. You in?
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:r  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:hito  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:AwesomeParents 
march 2013 by opalsong
Karkat: attempt alien diplomacy.
You review the terms of the diplomatic meeting one more time, as if they'll be less ridiculous on a sixth reading. "Two ranking officers," you read, "accompanied by no more than one bodyguard and one personal slave apiece." You look at Feferi as if she'll have gotten some other version of the memo.

She just shrugs with a jangle of bracelets. "Ranking officers means you and me, Karcrab," she says, "and I'm shore we can pick bodyguards...."

"But fucking personal slaves?" you finish when she trails off. What the fuck kind of decadent society do humans have, anyway?
fanwork  fandom:Homestuck  pairing:Karkat/Eridan  rating:nc-17  length:chaptered  type:prose  site:AO3  author:laylah  quality:salamander  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:au  extra:dubcon 
february 2013 by opalsong
Maintaining Cover
"You're starting to attract attention, Barton," Coulson's voice says in Clint's ear as Clint turns away another guy who wants to buy him a drink. "And not the good kind."
fanwork  fandom:avengers  pairing:clint/coulson  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:MontanaHarper  quality:salamander  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
february 2013 by opalsong
Keep You On My Arm
In which the gay bar is Stalberg's idea and Kaner doesn't notice Jon pretending to be his boyfriend.
fanwork  fandom:Hockey  Fandom:RPS  rating:nc-17  pairing:Tazer/Kaner  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:rsadelle  quality:sunfish  extra:gaychicken  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
december 2012 by opalsong
can't be hateful, gotta be grateful
"Be cool, Dad, we've decided to con Grandma."

(Or, the one where the Stilinski men drag Derek to Thanksgiving dinner at Grandma's and she gets the right wrong idea.)
fanwork  fandom:TeenWolf  pairing:Stiles/Derek  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  author:HalfFizzbin  quality:sunfish  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
december 2012 by opalsong
never say never
When 24-year old Tony Stark goes out to distract himself from the fact that he has been put on probation by his company's board of directors due to his partying lifestyle, he bumps into (quite literally) a law student named Steve Rogers, who has recently lost his father and has been 'dragged out' by his best friend to "have some fun."

"Some fun" turns into shots, Vegas, and...marriage?

Except, someone on probation is not allowed to have a quickie marriage. The only alternative is to somehow continue the farce until the probation is over, but that's not as easy as it sounds when very real feelings start being added to the equation.
fanwork  fandom:avengers  pairing:tony/steve  rating:pg-13  length:chaptered  Length:BigBang  type:prose  site:livejournal  author:lumediluna  quality:salamander  extra:au  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
may 2012 by opalsong
the reason you ruminate the shadowy past
So, Captain America effectively manages to cockblock Tony for a year.

It's not Steve's fault. Well, actually, it is. But he was just proving a point - that if a superhero is gay, how can it be wrong? Steve just picked the wrong superhero to make the point with. Now America will think they're dating - and Tony's not going to be the guy to break Captain America's heart.

There's only one way out. To save face, Steve and Tony have to become fake boyfriends. Steve thinks the "boyfriends" bit will be the hardest to act... but maybe it's the "fake" part that will be the hardest act of all...
fanwork  fandom:avengers  pairing:tony/steve  rating:pg-13  Length:LongShot  Length:BigBang  type:prose  site:AO3  author:Mizzy  quality:sunfish  extra:queer  Extra:Pretend!Relationship 
may 2012 by opalsong
Haru wo Daite Ita
A lighthearted romantic comedy that lampoons the adult film business, the mainstream media, and the natural vanity of actors while exploring the earliest stages of a brand new relationship.
type:manga  type:art  rating:r  pairing:yaoi  extra:porn  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  quality:salamander/sunfish  site:animea.net  author:NITTAYouka  Haven't_Finished 
october 2011 by opalsong
GW Kissage
The girls chased Heero. They chased Duo too, but Duo always let himself get caught. Consequently Heero was the more sought after of the two, because every girl likes a challenge.
Fandom:GW  Length:Short  Pairing:Heero/Duo  rating:pg  type:prose  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  quality:salamander/sunfish  site:livejournal  author:prillalar  fanwork 
june 2011 by opalsong
The Code
Barry says, “Maybe we should have gotten the lovebirds their own table,” and that’s the point where Dick can’t take it anymore.

In which there are fake relationships, bro codes, schemes and surprisingly supportive mentors. Oh, and some cupcakes.
fandom:youngjustice  pairing:robin/kidflash  pairing:kidflash/missmartian  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  fanwork  Pairing:Tim/Kon 
may 2011 by opalsong
Not in a gay way
Wally is totally not gay. Neither is Dick. So it's totally not gay if they practice being good boyfriends with each other, right?
fandom:dccomics  fandom:youngjustice  pairing:robin/kidflash  rating:r  length:oneshot  type:prose  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  fanwork 
april 2011 by opalsong
Even Better Than (the real thing)
The plan was simple - the literal two birds with one shot kill. Give Kris what he wants - honesty, and give the press what they can run with - a true love story that makes Kris' turn to the gay-side something less out of character and more in. Everyone knows that Kris is a sweet potato. Everyone knows that he believes in love and happily ever after. If he comes out of the closet in love with his best friend then he's a lot less likely to be eaten alive. The Kradam kids will erect a float for the Gay Pride Parade and the haters to the left will have a focus. Adam can be the bad guy, the seducer, the bright sparkly punching bag.

Kris agrees to get out of a stretch limo holding Adam Lambert’s hand at Lady GaGa’s Un-birthday Party. (If this doesn’t scare him back straight – nothing will.) A fic in which Kris and Adam are clueless and neither one realizes what is real.
Extra:Pretend!Relationship  extra:future  extra:comingout  fandom:ai  pairing:adam/kris  rating:r  Length:LongShot  Length:BigBang  type:prose  fanwork 
july 2010 by opalsong
Are You There, God? It's Me, Draco
Harry and Draco are straight Aurors. Then they're gay teachers. It makes sense in context.
Fandom:HP  Pairing:Harry/Draco  rating:nc-17  Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Length:Chaptered  type:prose  fanwork 
march 2010 by opalsong
It's Just Pretend, Right?
"Say that again," Brendon says. "The part about how I think you want me to be your pretend gay boyfriend to your elementary school teacher's retirement party. I think you're kind of crazy. Did you call Ryan?"
Extra:Pretend!Relationship  Fandom:PatD  Length:OneShot  Pairing:Spencer/Brendon  rating:pg-13  type:prose  fanwork 
december 2009 by opalsong
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