jerryking + silence   44

Kawhi’s silence was golden for making a deal without making enemies - The Globe and Mail
CATHAL KELLY
PUBLISHED JULY 7, 2019

"Never let anyone outside of the family know what you're thinking.". Vito Corleone.
basketball  Cathal_Kelly  closedmouth  cunning  deal-making  Kawhi_Leonard  lessons_learned  NBA  silence  smart_people  taciturn  Toronto_Raptors  wisdom 
july 2019 by jerryking
Had a Job Interview but No Callback? Here’s What to Do Next Time - The New York Times
By CHRISTOPHER MELEJUNE 1, 2017
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Managing_Your_Career  job_search  silence 
june 2017 by jerryking
How to avert catastrophe
January 21, 2017 | FT | Simon Kuper.

an argument: people make bad judgments and terrible predictions. It’s a timely point. The risk of some kind of catastrophe — armed conflict, natural disaster, and/or democratic collapse — appears to have risen. The incoming US president has talked about first use of nuclear weapons, and seems happy to let Russia invade nearby countries. Most other big states are led by militant nationalists. Meanwhile, the polar ice caps are melting fast. How can we fallible humans avert catastrophe?

• You can’t know which catastrophe will happen, but expect that any day some catastrophe could. In Tversky’s words: “Surprises are expected.” Better to worry than die blasé. Mobilise politically to forestall catastrophe.
• Don’t presume that future catastrophes will repeat the forms of past catastrophes. However, we need to expand our imaginations. The next catastrophe may take an unprecedented form.
• Don’t follow the noise. Some catastrophes unfold silently: climate change, or people dying after they lose their jobs or their health insurance. (The financial crisis was associated with about 260,000 extra deaths from cancer in developed countries alone, estimated a study in The Lancet.)
• Ignore banalities. We now need to stretch and bore ourselves with important stuff.
• Strengthen democratic institutions.
• Strengthen the boring, neglected bits of the state that can either prevent or cause catastrophe. [See Why boring government matters November 1, 2018 | | Financial Times | Brooke Masters.
The Fifth Risk: Undoing Democracy, by Michael Lewis, Allen Lane, RRP£20, 219 pages. pinboard tag " sovereign-risk" ]
• Listen to older people who have experienced catastrophes. [jk....wisdom]
• Be conservative. [jk...be conservative, be discerning, be picky, be selective, say "no"]
Simon_Kuper  catastrophes  Nassim_Taleb  black_swan  tips  surprises  imagination  noise  silence  conservatism  natural_calamities  threats  unglamorous  democratic_institutions  slowly_moving  elder_wisdom  apocalypses  disasters  disaster_preparedness  emergencies  boring  disaster_myopia  financial_crises  imperceptible_threats 
january 2017 by jerryking
Stephen Harper: After so many words, he exits in silence - The Globe and Mail
May 25, 2016

Mr. Harper’s solitary political goal was to make unalloyed conservatism a valid ballot option in a country ruled for decades by Liberals and red Tories. He succeeded to a degree, but then let an authoritarian nature overwhelm his own principles. He constantly redefined conservatism as whatever he thought it should be in the moment, no questions asked. It was never a conversation among Canadians, or even his own party.

He ended up burdening the Conservative Party with the perception that it contains an ugly strain of political partisanship that seeks to win at all costs, brooks no dissent, and feel no obligation to explain itself to the outside world. Undoing that legacy will be the biggest challenge faced by his successor.
editorials  Stephen_Harper  exits  silence  tough-mindedness  red_Tories  Conservative_Party  House_of_Commons  authoritarianism  political_partisanship 
may 2016 by jerryking
Obama Urges Raised Voices in Cuba’s Hushed Discussions of Race - The New York Times
MARCH 23, 2016 | NYT | By DAMIEN CAVE.

Defensiveness has long hovered over the subject of race, in part because Fidel Castro said shortly after the revolution that racism had been solved, making the subject taboo.

The discomfort, in part, came from pride: Some of the revolution’s most visible achievements involved ending institutionalized segregation, at beach clubs, at schools and in neighborhoods where the homes of wealthy white Cubans who fled were often given to Cubans of color.

Socialized medicine and education also helped create a society more deeply shaped by interracial interactions and marriages than the United States.

And yet, Cuba is no more postracial than anywhere else.....On an island that is around two-thirds black and mixed race, according to a 2007 study by the Cuban economist Esteban Morales Domínguez, the civil and public leadership is about 70 percent white. He also found that most scientists, technicians and university professors, up to 80 percent in some fields, were white....
Cuba  race  Afro-Latinos  Afro-Cubans  racism  silence  discomforts  shadism 
march 2016 by jerryking
When killers target women, why do moderate men stand silent? - The Globe and Mail
DENISE BALKISSOON
Special to The Globe and Mail
Published Monday, May. 26 2014
women  misogyny  masculinity  silence 
may 2014 by jerryking
We can’t keep tiptoeing around black-on-black violence - The Globe and Mail
Feb. 20 2013 | The Globe and Mail | MARCUS GEE

Pockets of the city where unemployment and dropout rates are high, where many sons grow up without a father, where gangs and guns are all around, have become dangerous traps for what social workers call at-risk youth. More often than not, they turn on each other. Black-on-black violence is a disfiguring stain on the face of the city’s multicultural success. It is an uncomfortable truth that, as a welcoming and liberal city, we prefer to ignore. The political class won’t talk about it for fear of being labelled racist. The media are almost as cowed.
Toronto  Marcus_Gee  African_Canadians  killings  violence  silence 
february 2013 by jerryking
Bad at Complying? You Might Just Be A Very Bad Listener
September 25, 2007 | WSJ |By JARED SANDBERG.

understand the limitations of your listening skills. Bad listeners tend to tune out dry subjects, get into arguments, fake attention, react to emotional words and daydream. (Wow, do humans actually drink from that encrusted water tower on the building across the street?)

While allegedly listening, bad listeners often are rehearsing what they're about to say, grab every conversational opening and scout for flaws in an argument.

By the end of the first day, you're not simply looking at a second day of course work but a long, slow rehabilitation.

The trick to listening better begins with readiness to listen, which, concedes instructor Jennifer Grau, isn't easy in an age of interruption abetted by call waiting and instant messages. It also helps a lot if you can set your judgments aside....the task of listening to understand rather than simply to reply has three key elements: Involved silence (eye contact, vocal encouragements), probes (supportive inquiry using questions like "what" as opposed to the aggressive "why") and paraphrasing ("What I think you said is..."). That last step shouldn't simply be spitting back what people say, but integrating information about the speaker's attitudes and feelings, 55% of which is communicated nonverbally in body language (only 7% of feelings are communicated with words, Ms. Grau says).

When you consider that these skills are culled from a longer list (awareness, attending, perceiving, etc.) it's clear that listening takes an awful lot of time, which few of us have.

"Efficiency and politeness are inversely correlated,"
listening  Communicating_&_Connecting  soft_skills  interruptions  silence  open_mind  nonverbal  body_language  people_skills  disagreements  argumentation 
june 2012 by jerryking
Passed Over for the Perfect Job? It May Be Best Not to Know Why - WSJ.com
June 10, 2003 | WSJ |By KEMBA DUNHAM | Staff Reporter of THE WALL STREET JOURNAL.

...Many job hunters know the agony of enduring a job interview and then hearing nothing for weeks, or even ever. The temptation often is strong to solicit postinterview feedback, to figure out whether it was something you said, or something that you couldn't have helped, that cost you the job....
setbacks  bouncing_back  Managing_Your_Career  silence  providing_feedback 
march 2012 by jerryking
Friedman: Spiritual missile shield a better defense - Houston Chronicle
THOMAS l. FRIEDMAN
Published 06:30 a.m., Wednesday, December 19, 2001

That is a task that must begin with Muslims themselves, which some are eager to do. They are eager for a language and a leadership that can reform Islam in a way that will make it more compatible with modern education, pluralism and religious tolerance. An e-mail message arrived the other day from a young Pakistani-American woman about a column I wrote decrying religious totalitarianism. She said: "You basically articulate the views of myself and many American Muslims that I know. I am only saddened that more Muslims do not come forward and articulate the same truth publicly -- that an Islamic enlightenment (I prefer `enlightenment' to your choice of `reform') is long overdue and this enlightenment should nurture a dynamic, progressive Islamic thought that embraces plurality and modernity. ... These ideas would be most persuasive to the masses of Muslims if conveyed by other Muslims."

On Al Jazeera TV the other night there was a debate on this subject in which the Arab journalist Ahmad al-Sarraf asked: "Why don't we have tolerance? This rhetoric of hatred is in all sermons, in all schoolbooks. ... We don't need America to interfere and teach us how to worship, but we need a certain element to force us to change our curriculum that calls for extremism."

The question is: Will any Arab-Muslim leaders rise to address these feelings, or will they all duck and hope that the storm blows over? Will the United States raise these issues of pluralism and tolerance with our Muslim allies, or will we duck as long as the oil keeps flowing?
tolerance  Tom_Friedman  Muslim  silence 
january 2012 by jerryking
SOMETIMES RACE IS SIMPLY A FACTOR
October 31, 2002 | National Post | Christie Blatchford

As the Star study also apparently revealed, black people represent almost 27% of all violence charges such as homicides, sex assaults and gun-related offences -- a percentage way out of whack in a city where, according to the most recent census figures, only 8.1% of Torontonians described themselves as black.

(Interestingly, the headline on this story, which read ''Black crime rates highest,'' was corrected the next day, lest anyone got the wrong impression: It was true, the correction said, that black Torontonians accounted for the highest amount of violent crime, but that did not mean they have the highest crime rate, ''which the Star's analysis of Toronto police data did not measure.'' Huh?)
Christie_Blatchford  statistics  Julian_Fantino  murders  Toronto  race  criminality  killings  political_correctness  silence  demographic_changes  African_Canadians  overrepresentation  Toronto_Police_Service  criminal_justice_system  violent_crime 
november 2011 by jerryking
Jamaicans mourn child slain at party
Nov 18, 2002 |The Globe and Mail. pg. A.14 | Colin Freeze.
ProQuest  killings  violence  Jamaica  Colin_Freeze  silence 
november 2011 by jerryking
The need for fathers
Nov 29, 2005| The Globe and Mail pg. A.20 | Carol Richards-Sauer.

Your editorial rightly claims we need to admit that the absence of black fathers contributes to social alienation and violent behaviour among some of their sons. The silence that you decry, however, is not universal.

Recently, I have participated in a town-hall meeting and been in the audience at a round-table discussion about gun violence.

Each time, at least one brave black person from the audience spoke about the issue. Each time, their comments sparked little discussion or self-evaluation.

The topic is rarely addressed because too many community leaders, often self-appointed, have become too focused on blaming forces from without that we can't control as primary or sole causes of black disenfranchisement.

We need to recognize also those forces from within that we can control. We need to characterize ourselves not just as people to whom bad things are done (racism, police brutality, school suspensions etc.) but also as people who make choices that sometimes lead to bad results.

This is necessary to make any true change and to win helpful alliances
ProQuest  fatherhood  family  dysfunction  African_Canadians  disenfranchisement  silence  individual_choice  autonomy  violence  killings  family_breakdown  systemic_discrimination  systemic_racism  beyond_one's_control 
november 2011 by jerryking
Boys without dads
Nov 28, 2005| The Globe and Mail. pg. A.14 | Robert Sciuk.

Finally, someone has had the guts to stand up and speak the truth of the dysfunctional family and the impact that growing up fatherless has upon the children and the teens of both sexes within the black communities (The Many Fatherless Boys In Black Families -- editorial, Nov. 26). While The Globe brings to light the issues, it holds back from stating the obvious fact that our government provides financial incentives to perpetuate the situation.

In Canada, we have strong, state-sponsored financial incentives for unwed teenage mothers to have and to keep their children, even in the absence of a caring nuclear family with which to provide a proper upbringing. Perhaps it's time to adjust the way we help these troubled teens to avoid unwanted conceptions rather than reward them financially for having babies.
ProQuest  letters_to_the_editor  silence  African_Canadians  courage  dysfunction  family  fatherhood  family_breakdown  out-of-wedlock 
november 2011 by jerryking
The many fatherless boys in black families
Nov 26, 2005 | The Globe and Mail. pg. A.26 | Editorials

...Yet as politicians at all three levels and black community leaders scramble for answers to the anarchy, no one has dared talk about the crisis of fatherlessness in the black community.

The silence is inexcusable. Growing up without a father present is now the norm for many black children in Canada, particularly those of Jamaican ancestry. Nearly half of all black children under 14 in Canada have just one parent in the home, compared to slightly under one in five of Canadian children as a whole, census figures from 2001 show. Two in three Jamaican-Canadian children in Toronto are being raised by a single parent...."without strong, self-sacrificing, frugal and industrious fathers as role models, our boys go astray, never learn how to be parents (or men), and perpetuate the dismal situation of single-parent homes run by tired and overworked black women. The black family as a survival unit fails, which leads to the ever-fragile community collapsing along with it."

Poor neighbourhoods in Toronto are crying out for involved fathers. The city's deputy police chief, Keith Forde, who is black, says that invariably when he speaks to predominantly black audiences, two or three mothers approach him to be a Big Brother to their sons. "Nothing hurtsme more in all I do in policing than hav-ing to say no to these parents."

Girls' lives, too, are deeply harmed in fatherless communities. At least a decade ago, Mr. Forde heard from 13- and 14-year-old girls in Rexdale, a dangerous suburb of Toronto, that the boys were insisting: "If you want to be my girlfriend you have to get pregnant for me."...The "survival unit," the black family, is being fatally weakened by the lack of fathers. No matter how helpful social programs, additional police or tougher gun laws may be, they are not the heart of the problem. Reuniting fathers and children should be the top priority. Where are the black fathers, and where are all those who should be calling them to their duty?
African_Canadians  dysfunction  family  silence  JCA  editorials  Toronto  fatherhood  killings  thug_code  family_breakdown  statistics  role_models  Jamaican  violence  say_"no"  Fifty-Cent  parenting 
november 2011 by jerryking
The wall of silence in Toronto's killings
The Globe and Mail. Toronto, Ont.: Nov 22, 2005. pg. A.22

Young black people tempted to adopt the urban gangster culture in Toronto now know they can kill with impunity. Canada's biggest city is in a full-fledged crisis of violence, and at the heart of it is a wall of silence in parts of the black community that protects killers.

On Friday, one of the most shocking killings in the city's history occurred. An 18-year-old man was shot dead on the steps of a church during the funeral of his 17-year-old best friend. This killing may be unprecedented in North America, says Police Chief Bill Blair, who has discussed it with the heads of several U.S. police departments. Even in Jamaica, which has a murder rate nearly 40 times as high as Toronto's, funerals are apparently off-limits.
ProQuest  killings  silence  African_Canadians  thug_code  Toronto  impunity  Bill_Blair 
november 2011 by jerryking
Separating races is not the answer
Oct 12, 2005 |The Globe and Mail. pg. A.22 |

...And why does it want this? Because black youths are shooting one another in the street. Ergo, says the coalition, society is failing black people. The school system, the justice system and the police are failing them. Even multiculturalism is failing them, because it presupposes an open society of equals rather than the real world in which blacks face racism and discrimination. Multiculturalism "doesn't allow us to focus on communities that are in crisis and need a targeted approach," Margaret Parsons, the executive director of the African Canadian Legal Clinic, told a Toronto newspaper. "It does not address racism."

This is quite stunning. Agencies that have been sitting on the sidelines for years have decided within two months that they have the answer. When community activist Dudley Laws declared in the summer of 2001 that at least 94 black youths had been killed by other black youths since 1996, the silence from black community groups was deafening. Now those groups wish to pick up their ball and bat and go home.

Segregating people by race, voluntary or otherwise, is not a solution. It compounds the problems of poverty, exclusion and related pathologies, including rampant fatherlessness and its flip side, out-of-control youth. Creating separate offices and separate schools, and tearing down behavioural codes that apply to everyone, will send a destructive message to everyone: that people do not have to live together, that separate is not so bad as long as it is equal.
ProQuest  in_the_real_world  segregation  African_Canadians  violence  killings  silence  editorials  dysfunction  fatherhood  family_breakdown 
november 2011 by jerryking
The cost of silence
Catherine Sinclair. The Globe and Mail. Toronto, Ont.: Nov 23, 2005. pg. A.18
silence  Toronto  African_Canadians  ProQuest  letters_to_the_editor  killings  deaths  racism  murders 
november 2011 by jerryking
The cost of silence
David Gladstone. The Globe and Mail. Toronto, Ont.: Nov 23, 2005. pg. A.18

For 25 years, I was a principal in the inner city of Toronto and, over all those years, one fact became very clear: Black mothers would not let their children be blamed by a white male authority figure without challenging that authority. A black mother would almost never admit that her child might have been in error in his or her behaviour.

However, I slowly began to understand why. There was no one else around to protect the black mother's child and it made no difference what the child did, the mother was not going to side with white authority against her child. Even when I used black teachers to discuss the issue with the mother, nothing changed.
ProQuest  letters_to_the_editor  African_Canadians  silence  teachers  criminality  murders  killings  deaths 
november 2011 by jerryking
Even in the city, it takes a village to raise a child space space
November 29, 2005 | The Globe and Mail – Page A21 | By WILLIAM THORSELL

It was wonderful last week to hear a pastor at another Toronto funeral for a young murdered black man demand that dysfunctional families and communities accept responsibility themselves for the trauma. Stop laying most of the blame on others, he said; face the fact that much of the pathology comes from within the home. The mourners in the church applauded. Many people who might try to help these troubled communities defer, waiting for the communities themselves to speak honestly about their own condition. At the core, it is a matter of values
William_Thorsell  Toronto  African_Canadians  funerals  murders  silence  killings  deaths  dysfunction  poverty  family_breakdown  values  face_the_facts 
november 2011 by jerryking
Bill Cosby Live - WSJ.com
MAY 25, 2004

By week's end Mr. Cosby had issued a statement pointing out that most of the news accounts dropped the context within which his remarks were delivered: a 50% high school dropout rate for inner-city African-American males that he rightly characterized as an "epidemic." In other words, Mr. Cosby's argument is that 1) a 50% black dropout rate ought to be regarded as a national scandal in a post-Brown America; and 2) dysfunctional behavior is dysfunctional whatever one's skin color.

Surely it says something about Mr. Cosby's critics that they are more disturbed by his speaking out than they are about the underlying crisis he's trying to address.
Bill_Cosby  African-Americans  silence  thug_code  social_classes 
november 2011 by jerryking
Breaking the Silence - New York Times
By HENRY LOUIS GATES JR
Published: August 01, 2004

Scholars such as my Harvard colleague William Julius Wilson say that the causes of black poverty are both structural and behavioral. Think of structural causes as ''the devil made me do it,'' and behavioral causes as ''the devil is in me.'' Structural causes are faceless systemic forces, like the disappearance of jobs. Behavioral causes are self-destructive life choices and personal habits. To break the conspiracy of silence, we have to address both of these factors.
African-Americans  Henry_Louis_Gates  Obama  Bill_Cosby  anti-intellectualism  scholars  silence  self-destructive  William_Julius_Wilson 
november 2011 by jerryking
The silence that kills
Dec. 15, 2010 | The Globe and Mail | Editorial
It was not the justice system that failed Ephraim Brown, an 11-year-old
gunfire victim in Toronto whose two alleged killers were acquitted of
second-degree murder on Monday. It was his community that failed him.

Sixty people were at the outdoor birthday party where he was killed in
July, 2007; only one, a teenage cousin, Kishauna Thomas, now 21, came
forward as a witness.

Impunity endangers everyone.

....The justice system is not something that, like an appliance, can be
taken to a repair shop to be fixed. It depends on people looking out
for one another and willing to do the right thing. When too few people
are engaged enough or brave enough, inevitably, the gangsters feel
empowered, and more innocent people are shot.
criminality  silence  impunity  civics  editorials  Canadian_justice_system  endangered  engaged_citizenry 
december 2010 by jerryking
Breaking the Silence - Op-Ed - NYTimes.com
Aug. 1, 2004 | New York Times | By HENRY LOUIS GATES JR. Why
has it been so difficult for black leaders to say such things in
public, without being pilloried for ''blaming the victim''? Why the huge
flap over Bill Cosby's insistence that black teenagers do their
homework, stay in school, master standard English and stop having
babies?...Yet in too many black neighborhoods today, academic
achievement has actually come to be stigmatized. ...Making it, as Mr.
Obama told me, ''requires diligent effort and deferred gratification.
Everybody sitting around their kitchen table knows that.''...the causes
of black poverty are both structural and behavioral. Think of structural
causes as ''the devil made me do it,'' and behavioral causes as ''the
devil is in me.'' Structural causes are faceless systemic forces, like
the disappearance of jobs. Behavioral causes are self-destructive life
choices and personal habits. To break the conspiracy of silence, we have
to address both of these factors.
African-Americans  Henry_Louis_Gates  silence  Obama  self-destructive  anti-intellectualism  poverty  values  Bill_Cosby  delayed_gratification  structural_change  academic_achievement 
september 2010 by jerryking
Op-Ed Columnist - www.jihad.com - NYTimes.com
By THOMAS L. FRIEDMAN
Published: December 15, 2009

Only Arabs and Muslims can fight the war of ideas within Islam. Islam
needs the same civil war. It has a violent minority that believes bad
things: that it is O.K. to not only murder non-Muslims — “infidels,” who
do not submit to Muslim authority — but to murder Muslims as well who
will not accept the most rigid Muslim lifestyle and submit to rule by a
Muslim caliphate.

What is really scary is that this violent, jihadist minority seems to
enjoy the most “legitimacy” in the Muslim world today. Few political and
religious leaders dare to speak out against them in public. Secular
Arab leaders wink at these groups, telling them: “We’ll arrest if you do
it to us, but if you leave us alone and do it elsewhere, no problem.”
Tom_Friedman  Afghanistan  Virtual_Afghanistan  Arab-Muslim_world  online_recruiting  silence 
december 2009 by jerryking
Extremism: Canadian Muslims must keep their eyes on the ball
Oct. 14, 2009 | Globe & Mail | by Sheema Khan. "Since
9/11, many Muslims felt the pendulum swayed excessively to the side of
security. They have worked alongside human-rights activists and the
courts to shift the balance toward civil liberties. However, the
principles of justice and their faith demand vigilance against both
rights abuses by government and security threats from extremists within
their own community. A disproportionate amount of attention has been
paid to the former. This must change."
extremism  Islamic  Muslim  civil_liberties  security  Canadian  silence 
november 2009 by jerryking
Did You Get My Resume? - WSJ.com
MARCH 5, 2009 | Wall Street Journal | by ANNE KADET. Author
cites the "awesome silence" that follows the submission of a resume and
which is due to the rise of automated screening.
Managing_Your_Career  career  job_search  silence  résumés  applicant-tracking_systems  following_up 
march 2009 by jerryking
Ahmadinejad's routine
21/10/06 G&M op-ed.

Muslim silence in the face of Mr. Ahmadinejad's foolish rants is highly
damaging. Unopposed, such dangerous radicals as Mr. Ahmadinejad may
appear to be speaking for a large portion of the Islamic world. That
helps no one, least of all Muslims.
Europe  op_ed  Iran  Ahmadinejad  Muslim  silence  moderates  anti-Semitism  double_standards 
february 2009 by jerryking

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