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North Dakota: remember this in November when you vote. If you voted for Trump bc you just couldn’t vote for a Dem,…
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2 days ago
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I begged you not to open that god damned cursed black sarcophagus and you didn't listen, now look at what you've do…
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2 days ago
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*my writing process*

me: this seems like a good place to put a comma

other me: no clint, put an em dash...

me: b…
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4 days ago
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Exactly 1 year apart.👏🏼
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4 days ago
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Minot School Board imposes contracts on teachers.
"The entire MEA overwhelmingly rejected the board’s off…
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4 days ago
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lying awake at 3am and can’t stop thinking about the time a man told me I needed to work on my elevator pitch after…
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4 days ago
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My 13 yro daughter just asked

What if "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" & "It's Raining Men" are about the same event…
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5 days ago
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Today’s date will be part of future written history as when it became apparent that the President of the United Sta…
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6 days ago
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listen, , and whatever other media enterprise, and also earth, we should stop idolizing people who have prob…
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6 days ago
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The Usual Suspects. Keep Del Toro.
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7 days ago
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This is such an awesome shot
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7 days ago
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I JUST WANT TO SAY THE PAST MONTH HAS BEEN SO FUN AND SO GREAT AND I LOVE THIS GAME AND I LOVE THE WORLD CUP AND I…
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7 days ago
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very happy for Samuel Umtiti, my twin brother
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7 days ago
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EVERYBODY THIS IS THE FINAL WORLD CUP GAME FOR FOUR YEARS DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HAPPENS IN FOUR YEARS I MEAN FOUR YE…
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7 days ago
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I went to the post office today & had this moment where I was like wow man the post office is conceptually amazing.…
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8 days ago
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Not too much of it left, but still wanted to wish you a happy Friday The 13th...
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8 days ago
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“We’re going to bed in 5 minutes. Do you want to set the timer or do you want me to?”
My 3-year old: “I will. Siri,…
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9 days ago
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I went from being extremely indifferent in regards to the yodeling kid and now it turns out I am the number one fan…
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9 days ago
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My career is in your ass? Huh?
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9 days ago
(429) https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1017813153130790912
IMPORTANT INFORMATION FOR ANY NEW POLITICS FOLLOWERS:

One time the guy who played Mr. Belvedere sat on his own bal…
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9 days ago
(429) https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1017806749028573184
Fortnite should put the actual rap songs behind the dances that make so much money as Emotes. Black creatives creat…
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9 days ago
(429) https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1017777389353480192
It was hard for me to leave my restaurant job. When you work long days in a hard job with thoughtful and funny peop…
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9 days ago
(429) https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1017775337403572225
Witch hunt: An intensive effort to discover and expose disloyalty, subversion, dishonesty, or the like.

Witch-hunt…
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9 days ago
(429) https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1017759179778478081
Have you ever thought about how tall Candy Kong is?

Donkey Kong's whole thing is that he's a giant ape, right? But…
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9 days ago
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I’ve been searching for a replacement for the team “pussy” as a perjorative descriptor(i.e. Don’t be a pussy). Afte…
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10 days ago
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Don't cry
don't raise your eye
it's only
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10 days ago
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My cover photo is becoming even more relevant
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10 days ago
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Remembering Richard Swift tonite on KEXP at 6pm. Archived for 2 weeks. Lots of his songs and his productions. He wa…
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11 days ago
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Matt Groening is an underrated political cartoonist
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11 days ago
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Dan Rudy is a reporter who doesn't make use of T9 at all.
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11 days ago
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TRULY HOW IS MBAPPE SO GOOD AT AGE 19 WHEN I WAS 19 I WAS BASICALLY THE OPPOSITE OF HIM IF THE OPPOSITE MEANS LIVIN…
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12 days ago
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thanks. at first i thought wearing all white was a bit old school but in the end i felt good about it.
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13 days ago
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I can't remember if it was my 2nd or 3rd, but there is video of me leaving my own birthday party to go have some al…
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14 days ago
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Parts of Teacher IG are an exercise in educational voyeurism and hypercapitalism. Don’t believe me, just watch.
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14 days ago
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Hey gang. I’ve done all the research and the results are in: The Iron Giant is the best movie ever made.

Thanks t…
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15 days ago
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Oh wow, I had no idea this happened in 1950
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15 days ago
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Steve Ditko passed away today at age 90. Without him there's no Spider-Man, no Doctor Strange, no Green Goblin... a…
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16 days ago
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everyone: teenagers need to focus on more important things
teenagers: *talk about politics, feminism, race, etc*
ev…
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16 days ago
What football will look like in the future
this is one year old today. i've never had more fun making something
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17 days ago
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a stranger just sent me an instagram DM with one of those (very kind) "saw this person holding your book in the boo…
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17 days ago
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I should be able to call the police on somebody for being racist. or if somebody calls the police on me because the…
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18 days ago
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Happy 4th of July to the mighty Bald eagle of America. 🎆
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18 days ago
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honestly I've been in a few relationships that literally nobody has wanted to see me in and the us against the worl…
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18 days ago
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Shout out to team Catastrophe who took a half lunch today & shot 2 scenes simultaneously to finish early so crew/ca…
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19 days ago
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Colin Kaepernick was given the National Education Association’s highest honor at the organization’s Human and Civil…
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19 days ago
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My wife just sent me this picture of my My son’s Trenson & Bant’s latest prank. They are in HUGE trouble when I ge…
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19 days ago
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Anyone who knows my HS physics teacher knows he is one of the most passionate teachers in the world. He always enco…
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20 days ago
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Any other old punks out there who grew up wearing boots who now feel like wearing any other type of shoe is the equ…
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24 days ago
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LGBT History Gets Short Shrift in Schools. There's an Effort to Change That

pridemonth  from twitter_favs
24 days ago
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One thing I have always said about Sarah Huckabee Sanders, this is someone who tries their best to treat people, ev…
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29 days ago
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miss me with that bullshit
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29 days ago
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From the Archives:

clown to earth
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4 weeks ago
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wow is england Bloc Party because after a really promising start they've had a hard time getting another hit even t…
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4 weeks ago
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Herman Melville was a whale.
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5 weeks ago
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that explains it - he just needs a shit
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6 weeks ago
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93% of NYC restaurants get an “A” from the health dept. Does anyone whine about grade inflation? No, those results…
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6 weeks ago
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Best revenge on the Trump voter (a stupid person who did a bad thing) is to give them & their kids ,…
MedicareForAll  from twitter_favs
8 weeks ago
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“If you think my father would EVER allow you and your little party pals to graduate from this ski academy, you’re s…
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9 weeks ago
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Add Jenga to your teaching arsenal! A great way to keep kids engaged and creative during these final weeks! Include…
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10 weeks ago
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If you’re from a broken home & struggle with Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, life, consider reading Sunny by Taiyo Mats…
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10 weeks ago
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RT : *extremely unable to leave the office voice* Folks,
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10 weeks ago
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i'm the chick from over 125 rap songs... 😉
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10 weeks ago
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