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Twitter
POLITICIANS (SOBBING): please, sir. you can’t just say things are braver than the troops. it’s not fair

ME (pointi…
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4 hours ago
Twitter
I just vacuumed and now there's a weird smudge in tne middle of the carpet!
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4 hours ago
Twitter
lmao a lady got kicked out of a restaurant
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5 hours ago
Twitter
1518: Following the invention of the printing press, books printed using this new technology are denounced by other…
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6 hours ago
Twitter
Opinion: Let the trump team eat a bunch of farts
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6 hours ago
Twitter
“Charlie Learns How to Use Alexa,” a short story told in the medium of my Alexa question history
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8 hours ago
Twitter
hi i am at the museum of dead aminals
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8 hours ago
Twitter
Come to giant sandwich in the next fifteen minutes if you want an ass kicking.
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11 hours ago
Twitter
My dude, our country has 50 million less eleigible players, partly because of the genocide you subjected my country…
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13 hours ago
Twitter
oh and lastly, did amazing work on organizing + building the launcher... if you're interested in making…
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13 hours ago
Twitter
Yeah, Cyberpunk 2077 looks cool, but American Truck Simulator's Oregon expansion is the real hype.
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19 hours ago
Untitled (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2eUxQ2_CQlw)
This tweet made me aware of this wonderful and joyful experience that I must now pass on to all of you:
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22 hours ago
Twitter
RustyHeaven_v2.wsz
Try Online:
Download:
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22 hours ago
Twitter
This keyboard has too much of everything. It's also a calculator.
from twitter_favs
23 hours ago
Vintage Focus Electronic FK-5001 Keyboard | eBay
This keyboard has too much of everything. It's also a calculator.
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23 hours ago
Twitter
There’s a common factor: Mike Huckabee
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23 hours ago
Twitter
pro scrabble arguments:
- memorization is a valid mechanic?
- if it was an abstract territory game with no letters,…
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yesterday
Twitter
Try the 🆕 Weird Steak Fanta Zero
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yesterday
Twitter
Today we’re seeing a production of Macbeth, and last night I dreamt that the play had been “officially renamed” (?)…
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yesterday
Twitter
I’m only using Big the Cat in Sonic Team Racing. He is the equivalent to adding a million add-ons to the Cactuar gu…
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yesterday
Twitter
Sauron is literally a second Dark Lord, because nobody learned anything from defeating the first one, Morgoth.

To…
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yesterday
Twitter
TFW u thought a drink was anything but milk but it's fucking milk.
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yesterday
Twitter
Found out today that this is what 'Die Hard With A Vengeance' is known as in Denmark. That's great.
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yesterday
Twitter
every joke mike huckabee has ever made is a feeble attempt to keep at bay the demons that have danced in the back o…
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yesterday
Twitter
Wow. I just would like to say, I'm so honored to be awarded this Good Mood. I'd like to dedicate it to the ones who…
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yesterday
Twitter
OOC- AT&T just emailed a privacy policy update. "As always, your privacy is most important."

The click here to vi…
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yesterday
Twitter
If there’s one thing the trump administration is known for its respectful disagreement
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yesterday
Twitter
If you don't understand the difference between denying service to someone because of who they are and denying servi…
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yesterday
Twitter
The feelings he was trying to capture: discovering what’s in mysterious old piles of software, doodling, the joy of…
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yesterday
Twitter
Beat the heat with Custard Fanta!
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yesterday
Twitter
2016:
“Brexit will provide more opportunities for business”

2018:
“Fuck business”
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yesterday
Twitter
SOMEONE just got a pair o' rare legs
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2 days ago
Twitter
donald and ivana trying to use don jr as divorce leverage until they both realized that neither of them wanted him…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Bethesda identifying stolen code by the bugs in it is the most perfectly bethesda thing i can think of
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2 days ago
Twitter
using presets on synths is okay

using brushes in photoshop is okay

using filters on pictures is okay

using unity…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Cackling NPR Host Warns Upcoming Segment May Feature Content Too Dark, Too Chilling, Too Positively Ghoulish For Yo…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Hi, my normal contracting rate is $150 an hour.

For opinions on "What it James Damore was right and women can't co…
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2 days ago
Twitter
She looks like a Chris (simpsons artist) drawing
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2 days ago
Twitter
I peep you trying to sow racial discord, you deceitful monster. Did you also speak to the Latino Americans who were…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Last night a woman yelled to me out her car window: “Lemme help you walk that dog!” I thought I was being catcalled…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Graphic showing the Eurythmics, adjusted to reflect the proportionate fame of each member. 1990.
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2 days ago
Twitter
Apparently a Fortnite PS4 bundle is launching July 16, includes an exclusive skin and 500 V-Bucks…
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2 days ago
Twitter
I requested Likey at Union back when it came out and they’ve kept the video in their rotation ever since my Columbu…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Peak Brexit front page - yes your high skilled engineering job might be disappearing but on the bright side you'll…
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2 days ago
Twitter
B.O.M.B.S. with these important anime notes
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3 days ago
Twitter
tfw you realize tomorrow is your 4-year anniversary at work
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3 days ago
Twitter
if there are baby jails it stands to reason that there are baby jail guards. I wonder what they tell people they do…
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3 days ago
Twitter
the idea that you should want to re-make movie in order to "make a version that is as close to universally accepted…
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3 days ago
Twitter
Living in a goddamn political cartoon. There are going to be men in jackets with CORRUPTION lettered on the back ne…
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3 days ago
Twitter
Video games were right, the apocalypse WILL have extremely on-the-nose graffiti slogans everywhere
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3 days ago
Twitter
Hi, we've canceled Star Spangled Beasters. You can read more about it below. Thanks.
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3 days ago
Twitter
What's beef?
Beef is when you need 2 Gats to go to sleep
Beef is when your moms ain't safe up in the streets
Beef…
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3 days ago
Twitter
please please please please pleeeeeeeaaaase please actually happen please please please please please 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻…
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3 days ago
Twitter
Zuko update: I've been training him to be held like a baby, but he always has an expression like those strange babi…
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3 days ago
The Real Story of Donald Trump Jr. | GQ
This passage in 's profile of Don Jr. is...really something.
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3 days ago
Twitter
This passage in 's profile of Don Jr. is...really something.
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3 days ago
Twitter
people say artists don't care about their fans but Gucci Mane is out here making sure I can peel eggs efficiently
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3 days ago
Twitter
Sometimes I feel like the universe wants me to produce a grocery store that sells only seafood meat, but if only it…
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3 days ago
Twitter
you know how us academics are always going on about the corporatization of the university? it's because under capit…
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3 days ago
Twitter
When the DM introduces a new NPC to the group.
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3 days ago
Twitter
I’m back in NYC and it’s
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4 days ago
Twitter
“I’m never going back there. It’s a shithole!” says Simon
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4 days ago
Twitter
My boyfriend is continuously showing me fucking bachelor frog memes in this bar in 2018 and saying “this is you” ov…
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4 days ago
Twitter
i got black out drunk and woke up in a warehouse. ordinarily this would be a bad thing but some nice man left me a…
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4 days ago
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