elwarre + self_loathing   126

When Will These Scars Begin to Fade?
"Through everything he had never seen himself as a victim, he was just himself and his partner was just his partner and their life together was just what happened." (7213 words)
merlin  arthur  will(merlin)  merlin/arthur  merlin/will(merlin)  hurt!merlin  abused!merlin  raped!merlin  scarred!merlin  protective!arthur  understanding!arthur  pining!arthur  asshole!will(merlin)  abusive!will(merlin)  hurt/comfort  abuse:domestic  noncon/dubcon  self_loathing  escape/rescue  recovery  infidelity  first_time  fandom:merlin  author:caledonia 
10 weeks ago by elwarre
✢ Wolf in the House
“What? It’s totally an improvement. He’s not scowling, or dating bad guys, or slinking around in unsanitary places. Still a bit paranoid, but what can you do. At least he’s a lot easier to get along with when you can buy his affections with ear rubs.” “And you always wanted a dog,” Sheriff added wryly. “And I always wanted a dog.” (33,481 words)
  stiles_stilinski  derek_hale  sheriff_stilinski  stiles/derek  understanding!stiles  protective!stiles  feral!derek  hurt!derek  ptsd!derek  protective!sheriffstilinski  understanding!sheriffstilinski  pov:derek  angst  hurt/comfort  domesticity  ptsd  self_loathing  recovery  preslash  fandom:teenwolf  author:joelawson  have:pdf 
april 2018 by elwarre
“You don’t really want to date me, Even. Believe me,” Isak says. “I don’t?” Isak just shakes his head. There’s nothing for him to offer a guy like Even. He should be treated like royalty, pampered every day. That’s never going to be Isak. He doesn’t have that kind of affection in him anymore. There’s nothing left. (104,140 words)
isak_valtersen  even_bech_naesheim  isak/even  student!isak  addict!isak  top!isak  student!even  bottom!even  pov:isak  pov:even  schmoop  angst  hurt/comfort  illness:mental  self_loathing  drugs:recreational  addiction  homophobia  abuse:child(past)  confession/secrets  college  hothothot  kink:fingering  kink:rimming  kink:switching  first_time  series/verse  skam:au:different!meeting  fandom:skam  author:nofeartina 
march 2018 by elwarre
And If Your Glass Heart Should Crack
"Chris sometimes feels as though he's the only one who can see how broken Isak Valtersen is. And so he attempts to piece him back together, even when it feels hopeless." (13,882 words) Companion Piece to "All That You Can't Leave Behind"
chris_schistad  isak_valtersen  isak/even  protective!chris_schistad  hurt!isak  ptsd!isak  pov:chris_schistad  character_study  angst  friendship  noncon/dubcon  homophobia  ptsd  abuse:emotional/psychological  brainwashing/mindgames  self_loathing  fighting/sparring  fandom:skam  author:disconight  have:pdf 
march 2018 by elwarre
All That You Can't Leave Behind
"Isak looks at Even, with that soft and quiet adoration, the way he used to look at Jonas. This should be a good thing, right? No straight guy wants their best friend to be in love with them. Or: Jonas finds himself in a downward spiral when he realises his feelings for Isak were never purely platonic. When a painful event from their first year rears its ugly head, he manipulates the situation to his advantage." (107,802 words)
isak_valtersen  jonas_vasquez  even_bech_naesheim  eva_mohn  chris_schistad  isak/even  hurt!jonas  guilty!jonas  pining!jonas  jealous!jonas  asshole!jonas  addict!jonas  hurt!isak  raped!isak  ptsd!isak  protective!even  pov:jonas  angst  dark  hurt/comfort  friendship  noncon/dubcon  brainwashing/mindgames  abuse:emotional/psychological  drugs:recreational  addiction  illness:mental  ptsd  jealousy  unrequited  homophobia  self_loathing  selfharm  recovery  established!relationship  fandom:skam  author:disconight  have:pdf 
march 2018 by elwarre
Watch and Learn
"As a boy, Clint learns to keep out of sight, how to read situations, and how to put his others before himself. When Clint is a young man, he gets shot by Agent Phil Coulson, and he learns to put those skills to use. Clint's formative years, his work with Trickshot, and his long history with SHIELD. The Avengers will be a thing, but their coming together diverges from the movie." (87,329 words)
clint_barton  phil_coulson  natasha_romanov  barney_barton  clint/phil  bamf!clint  hurt!clint  clueless!clint  pining!clint  clueless!phil  pining!phil  pov:clint  action  angst  friendship  self_loathing  abuse:child(past)  slowburn  pining  first_time  fandom:marvel  author:sheyrena_wyrsabane  need:pdf 
september 2017 by elwarre
What Your Hands Know
"Something is wrong. Not just the falling and swimming and running and hiding and starving. Something is wrong with it. The temporary repair job from the bank vault has started to unravel, just like everything else." (16,705 words)
bucky_barnes  steve_rogers  tony_stark  steve/bucky  hurt!bucky  protective!steve  pov:bucky  angst  hurt/comfort  self_loathing  brainwashing/mindgames  recovery  previous!relationship  fandom:marvel  author:superheroresin 
september 2017 by elwarre
✢ Assume a Defensive Stance
"No one can understand why Bruce and Clint are together. Clint's loud, brash, irritating--exactly what Bruce doesn't need in his life. (Also, there are sandwiches. Of LOVE.)" (4631 words) Wonderful.
  clint_barton  bruce_banner  steve_rogers  clint/bruce  hurt!clint  protective!bruce  pov:bruce  schmoop  character_study  self_loathing  established!relationship  pairings:unusual  fandom:marvel  author:hoosierbitch  have:pdf 
september 2017 by elwarre
✢ The Course of Honor
"When Jainan arrived on Iskat to represent his home planet in a diplomatic marriage to Imperial Prince Taam, he was naïve enough to hope the match would work. Taam knew better. Five years later, his confidence shattered, Jainan is released when Taam dies in an accident, only to be faced with another marriage to help salvage his treaty. Jainan understands how the real world works now; but Prince Kiem - the cheerful, scandal-prone darling of the Iskat celebrity magazines - keeps breaking all the rules he's learned." (117,499 words)
  m/m  scifi  politics  misunderstanding  self_loathing  abuse:domestic(past)  cabin/wilderness  hypothermia  drugs:nonconsensual  incarceration  interrogation  brainwashing/mindgames  hallucinations  confession/secrets  escape/rescue  fighting/sparring  arranged!marriage  slowburn  pining  first_time  original_fiction  author:avoliot  have:pdf 
august 2017 by elwarre
✢ Where the Dandelions Grow
"He never truly believed anything big would come from him and Daryl Dixon. It’d end with heartbreak on his part, because he made the mistake of letting his guard down, but this was the first time he actually paused. Considered the possibilities. Months following the defeat of the Saviors, Paul and Daryl try to move forward." (45,978 words) Thoughtful and quietly gorgeous.
  daryl_dixon  paul_rovia  maggie_greene  daryl/paul  protective!daryl  scarred!daryl  top!daryl  bottom!paul  character_study  domesticity  self_loathing  homophobia  abuse:child(past)  scars  hothothot  kink:manhandling  established!relationship  fandom:walkingdead  author:rendoe  have:pdf 
august 2017 by elwarre
✢ The Way Down
Malfoy’s all, “Come out of there,” the way you say to a cat who is badly behaved. And Harry’s all like, “No, what, I’m a hermit! And I have a chest-monster! And I am crazy magically powerful!” and Malfoy’s all, “We all have problems, bub.” (thoughtfully) “You are crazy though. I’ll give you that.” (70,000 words)
  harry_potter  draco_malfoy  hermione_granger  ron_weasley  harry/draco  hermione/ron  hermit!harry  bamf!harry  ptsd!harry  understanding!draco  friendship  angst  hurt/comfort  ptsd  self_loathing  recovery  languages:multiple  merpeople  first_time  hp:postseries  fandom:harrypotter  author:lettered  have:pdf 
august 2017 by elwarre
Now My Neck is Open Wide
"Six months post-war, Harry meets Grayson Wenke, a famous Quidditch player. Harry believes he's found the love of his life, and a Happily Ever After ending suitable for the storybooks. When Grayson slowly goes from Prince Charming to a monster behind closed doors, Harry finds himself trapped, and alone, and fearing for his life. When Harry realizes he's pregnant, the opportunity for escape - and a real Happily Ever After - presents itself as none other than Draco Malfoy. The only question is if Harry is brave enough to take a chance, and strong enough to heal." (75,061 words)
harry_potter  draco_malfoy  harry/draco  harry/omc  hurt!harry  abused!harry  raped!harry  pregnant!harry  parent!harry  bottom!harry  author!draco  punk!draco  protective!draco  pining!draco  top!draco  angst  hurt/comfort  abuse:domestic  abuse:emotional/psychological  noncon/dubcon  self_loathing  pining  kink:piercings  kink:tattoos  kink:mpreg  first_time  hp:postseries  fandom:harrypotter  author:ladyslytherin 
august 2017 by elwarre
No Sign of Love
"Outed by the Daily Prophet, Harry escapes the Wizarding World and ends up on the streets. Desperate and in fear for his life, he Apparates to 'somewhere safe' and winds up in the entryway of the last person he expected to see." (52,374 words)
harry_potter  severus_snape  draco_malfoy  luna_lovegood  harry/severus  homeless!harry  hurt!harry  reluctant!harry  protective!severus  pining!severus  healer!draco  angst  hurt/comfort  friendship  self_loathing  homophobia  homelessness  hunger/starvation  noncon/dubcon  slowburn  pining  first_time  hp:postseries  fandom:harrypotter  author:asecretchord  have:pdf 
august 2017 by elwarre
Secret Love Song
"If there's one thing Draco's certain about, it's that Harry Potter's hiding something. When he gets to the bottom of Harry's closely guarded secret, a flippant solution brings them closer together and forces Harry to confront his past." (21,796 words)
harry_potter  draco_malfoy  harry/draco  auror!harry  reluctant!harry  virgin!harry  bottom!harry  pining!draco  top!draco  pov:draco  angst  hurt/comfort  homophobia  self_loathing  selfharm  confession/secrets  pining  kink:virginity  kink:fingering  first_time  hp:postseries  fandom:harrypotter  author:writcraft  have:pdf 
july 2017 by elwarre
✢ Angels on the Moon
"The aftermath of the war is almost as difficult as the war itself, Harry is a mess and Severus is a reluctant survivor forced back to Hogwarts to recuperate from his injuries. When a brick-bonding spell goes awry, Harry and Severus are forced to confront hatred, misunderstandings and a new and unexpected intimacy which takes them both by surprise." (26,911 words) Loved this.
  harry_potter  severus_snape  minerva_mcgonagall  harry/severus  depressed!harry  bottom!harry  protective!severus  top!severus  pov:harry  angst  schmoop  depression  self_loathing  bonding/soulmates  hothothot  kink:fingering  first_time  hp:postseries  fandom:harrypotter  author:writcraft  have:pdf 
july 2017 by elwarre
✢ In Blood Only
"Snape is Harry's father. No one is happy to hear it." (185,251 words) I'm not generally huge on father!Snape fics, but this one at least has a believable premise and a thoroughly honest and lovely progression from enmity to love.
  harry_potter  severus_snape  ron_weasley  remus_lupin  hermione_granger  lucius_malfoy  nymphadora_tonks  bellatrix_lestrange  gen  harry/tonks  hurt!harry  grieving!harry  tortured!harry  parent!severus  asshole!severus  protective!severus  asshole!lucius  angst  grief  self_loathing  abuse:child(past)  hunger/starvation  confession/secrets  curse/spell  torture  revenge  hp:year2  fandom:harrypotter  author:emsnape  need:pdf 
june 2017 by elwarre
If Steve Rogers Were Your Boyfriend
"When he's not editing a magazine he truly loathes or navigating a rocky relationship he truly doesn't deserve, Bucky Barnes writes a fantasy romance column with an unexpectedly loyal internet following about the barista at his favorite cafe. Barista Boyfriend makes these other worlds bearable, but the real world dreamboat isn’t remotely involved; Steve Rogers is just a muse. Everyone loves the column. And it definitely isn’t killing Bucky very gently in 500 word increments, not in the slightest. What kind of a writer can't keep fact and fiction straight? James Fuckin' Barnes, that's who." (70,199 words)
bucky_barnes  steve_rogers  natasha_romanov  peggy_carter  clint_barton  sam_wilson  tony_stark  scott_lang  brock_rumlow  steve/bucky  bucky/rumlow  author!bucky  editor!bucky  hurt!bucky  clueless!bucky  barista!steve  pining!steve  protective!natasha  asshole!rumlow  friendship  angst  hurt/comfort  misunderstanding  bakery/coffeeshop  animal_shelter  abuse:emotional/psychological  self_loathing  cabin/wilderness  pining  first_time  marvel:au:no!supers  fandom:marvel  author:bopeep 
may 2017 by elwarre
Prometheus Bound
"Harry survives an unbearable summer and returns to Hogwarts to learn secrets about himself that he really could have done without. He’s lost his sight, all illusions about his parentage, and now will he lose himself." (172,430 words) Lots of warnings on this one, but a well-written and intriguing story nonetheless.
harry_potter  severus_snape  albus_dumbledore  draco_malfoy  hermione_granger  neville_longbottom  ron_weasley  remus_lupin  ginny_weasley  gen  bamf!harry  protective!harry  hurt!harry  abused!harry  whipped!harry  raped!harry  blind!harry  ptsd!harry  lonely!harry  arrested!harry  parent!severus  protective!severus  guilty!severus  understanding!draco  protective!hermione  asshole!ron  pov:harry  angst  action  hurt/comfort  abuse:child  whipping  hunger/starvation  incarceration  noncon/dubcon  ptsd  self_loathing  selfharm  loneliness  permanent!injury  disability  confession/secrets  hp:year6  fandom:harrypotter  author:dius_corvus  need:pdf 
april 2017 by elwarre
Breathing Smoke
"Stiles closed his eyes, breathing in and out with careful slowness. He wasn’t crying. He couldn’t let himself cry. He couldn’t let anyone see. No one could see, he remembered. This didn’t come with scars." (109,488 words)
stiles_stilinski  derek_hale  lydia_martin  jackson_whittemore  sheriff_stilinski  scott_mccall  alan_deaton  allison_argent  stiles/derek  stiles/ofc  powers!stiles  magical!stiles  bamf!stiles  parent!stiles  hurt!stiles  raped!stiles  possessed!stiles  guilty!stiles  ptsd!stiles  protective!derek  smart!lydia  bamf!lydia  action  angst  hurt/comfort  possession  magic  fairies  unicorns  noncon/dubcon  ptsd  selfharm  self_loathing  revenge  underage  first_time  fandom:teenwolf  author:kindreturnany  have:pdf 
march 2017 by elwarre
✢ Shadows Where I Stand
"After the events of "This Sorrowful Life," Rick wakes up in the hospital with the name of the man he can't live without forgotten on his lips and a doctor telling him that the last two years have been a dream. He then begins the long, arduous process of readjusting to life in the real world, but he can't get the image of the beautiful archer out of his head and soon signs start to appear that the dream may actually be real. Could Rick actually find his hunter? Could they actually have a shot at a happy ending? And will Rick finally be able to tell Daryl that he is the love of his life?" (126,990 words)
  rick_grimes  daryl_dixon  shane_walsh  lori_grimes  merle_dixon  carol_peletier  carl_grimes  maggie_greene  beth_greene  hershel_greene  glenn_rhee  daryl/rick  lori/shane  merle/michonne  glenn/maggie  officer!rick  parent!rick  clueless!rick  pining!rick  bartender!daryl  parent!daryl  pining!daryl  understanding!shane  pov:rick  angst  domesticity  altered!reality  dreams/visions  self_loathing  pining  slowburn  hothothot  kink:switching  sex:rough  first_time  wd:au:no!walkers  fandom:walkingdead  author:skarlatha  have:pdf 
february 2017 by elwarre
How it Adds Up
"When Bucky remembers that he used to turn tricks for money in the 1930s, he realizes the Bucky Barnes that Steve believes in is a lie. He's always been the worthless, degenerate creature Hydra told him he was. He just has to make Steve understand that." (6966 words)
bucky_barnes  steve_rogers  natasha_romanov  clint_barton  steve/bucky  bucky/omc  hurt!bucky  ptsd!bucky  raped!bucky  hooker!bucky  clueless!steve  understanding!steve  protective!natasha  understanding!natasha  protective!clint  pov:bucky  character_study  angst  hurt/comfort  prostitution  noncon/dubcon  ptsd  self_loathing  previous!relationship  fandom:marvel  author:brighteyedjill 
january 2017 by elwarre
Through a Glass Darkly
"At the CDC Shane takes out his frustration on Daryl for the first time. What will happen between the two of them as Shane becomes more and more unhinged? And will Rick be able to help?" (17,902 words)
daryl_dixon  rick_grimes  shane_walsh  carol_peletier  lori_grimes  daryl/rick  daryl/shane  lori/rick  hurt!daryl  raped!daryl  sick!daryl  clueless!rick  grieving!rick  asshole!shane  dark!shane  angst  dark  hurt/comfort  friendship  grief  noncon/dubcon  self_loathing  selfharm  slowburn  first_time  wd:season:2  wd:season:3  fandom:walkingdead  author:lea_ysaye 
january 2017 by elwarre
Daddy, Please No
"After Mary's death, John is very lonely, and he can't help but notice how attracted he is to Sam (who is eight)." (85,000 words) VERY dark, not kinky; please heed warnings
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  bobby_singer  sam/dean  hurt!sam  abused!sam  raped!sam  depressed!sam  protective!dean  asshole!john  abusive!john  protective!bobby  hurt/comfort  dark  angst  abuse:child  noncon/dubcon  underage  selfharm  self_loathing  depression  recovery  revenge  kink:bdsm  first_time  spn:preseries  fandom:spn  author:wincest_whore 
december 2016 by elwarre
Bound to Blame
""...my dad does, too. You don't want to see him when he's drinking." Teenchester, minor hurt!Sam, Sam's POV." (5437 words)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  gen  hurt!sam  guilty!sam  abused!sam  protective!dean  abusive!john  pov:sam  hurt/comfort  angst  abuse:child  self_loathing  werewolves  spn:preseries  fandom:spn  author:sparkiebunny 
december 2016 by elwarre
Cured Everything Wrong with Him
"Bucky was the worst best friend in the world. Steve was fine, cured of everything that had ever been wrong with him. Bucky should have been rejoicing with him. Instead he wanted to throw up or cry. This fits into the Don't Ask series right before Don't Ask, but there are no spoilers and you don't need to read any of the series. Set during and after Bucky's rescue in Captain America: The First Avenger." (8230 words) Part 3 of Don't Ask, Don't Tell
bucky_barnes  steve_rogers  steve/bucky  hurt!bucky  tortured!bucky  guilty!bucky  bottom!bucky  protective!steve  top!steve  angst  military  torture  escape/rescue  homophobia  self_loathing  established!relationship  series/verse  fandom:marvel  author:annafugazzi  have:pdf 
december 2016 by elwarre
All My Ribbons and My Medals and My Trophies
Jeff leans in and rests their foreheads together. “It’s really gonna be fine. You’re a great player.” Mike wants to snort, wants to yell at him because for the past fifteen days, that’s all Jeff’s been saying. Mike wants to ask him if he needs glasses. “Yeah,” He just says, around the lump in his throat. (23,757 words)
mike_richards  jeff_carter  dean_lombardi  mike/jeff(hockey)  mike/dean(hockey)  hurt/comfort  sports  misunderstanding  noncon/dubcon  self_loathing  breakup  established!relationship  fandom:hockey  author:anonymous  have:pdf 
november 2016 by elwarre
"Following the events of Road Trip, Sam and Cas head to the bunker. Sam doesn't feel quite like himself after being used as a vessel and has some trouble to be at peace again with the idea that Cas is still wearing Jimmy Novak's body." (8327 words)
sam_winchester  castiel  sam/castiel  hurt!sam  depressed!sam  protective!castiel  hurt/comfort  angst  depression  self_loathing  possession  recovery  bunker  first_time  spn:season:9  spn:ep:9.10(road_trip)  fandom:spn  author:moonyj4m 
october 2016 by elwarre
✢ This Kid's Not Alright
"What exactly did Sam get up to at Bobby's while Dean was at Sonny's? When John makes a very odd request of the older hunter, Bobby takes the boy into his home for a few months. It isn't an easy time for either of them." (22,843 words)
  sam_winchester  john_winchester  bobby_singer  gen  bamf!sam  hurt!sam  abused!sam  asshole!john  neglectful!john  abusive!john  pov:bobby  angst  casefic  abuse:child  abuse:emotional/psychological  self_loathing  salamanders  spn:preseries  fandom:spn  author:safiyabat  have:pdf 
october 2016 by elwarre
"Jensen has been living and working the streets for years, he lives alone until a chance meeting at the bus depot diner means he finds himself looking after the naïve and trusting Jared. When a group called Misha's Angels tries to help them on to a better life will it draw them closer together or tear them apart?" (6200 words)
jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  misha_collins  jared/jensen  homeless!jared  homeless!jensen  hooker!jensen  reluctant!jensen  pining!jensen  angst  schmoop  prostitution  homelessness  self_loathing  pining  first_time  fandom:rpf  author:violetknights 
september 2016 by elwarre
Three Months Post-Austin
"Short piece of straight-up angst while I continue work on the next part of the series." (395 words) Part 3 of the Heartbreak series
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  gen  hooker!sam  hurt!sam  depressed!sam  clueless!john  heartbreaking  angst  depression  selfharm  self_loathing  prostitution  series/verse  spn:preseries  fandom:spn  author:seeemrunning  have:pdf 
september 2016 by elwarre
My Brother the Whore
"Dean's not stupid. He just needs some time to put the pieces together. (Dean's side of Cold Streets, Warm Sheets.)" (2967 words) Part 2 of the Heartbreak series
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  gen  hooker!sam  hurt!sam  guilty!dean  protective!dean  neglectful!john  asshole!john  casefic  angst  heartbreaking  prostitution  underage  self_loathing  witches/wizards  clinic/hospital  series/verse  spn:preseries  fandom:spn  author:seeemrunning  have:pdf 
september 2016 by elwarre
✢ Cold Streets, Warm Sheets
"Sam Winchester is thirteen when the motel manager comes knocking, and sixteen when his job gets him into trouble." (11,747 words) Part 1 of the Heartbreak series
  sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  gen  hooker!sam  hurt!sam  abused!sam  raped!sam  clueless!dean  clueless!john  asshole!john  neglectful!john  casefic  angst  heartbreaking  abuse:child  noncon/dubcon  prostitution  underage  self_loathing  resentment  witches/wizards  clinic/hospital  series/verse  spn:preseries  fandom:spn  author:seeemrunning  have:pdf 
september 2016 by elwarre
There's A Hole In My Life, I Wish I Could Fill It (With Anything But You)
"Sam and Dean got together when Sam was sixteen, but Sam figures out pretty quickly that it's not exactly what he wanted. Sex can be used as a tool just like anything else can. When the world-saving fight is over, Sam still wants his brother, but knows he can never have him again. But when Dean asks to start their relationship again, Sam takes drastic measures to ensure what happened last time will never happen again. This story does deal with dubious levels of consent, but I promise you that by the end everyone is happy and enthusiastically consenting." (11,906 words)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  castiel  sam/dean  sam/omc  dean/ofc  hurt!sam  depressed!sam  pining!sam  jealous!sam  bottom!sam  protective!dean  hurt!dean  top!dean  hurt/comfort  angst  misunderstanding  depression  self_loathing  selfharm  werewolves  infidelity  pining  jealousy  underage  kink:switching  sex:rough  established!relationship  spn:preseries  spn:season:9  spn:postseries  fandom:spn  author:waterbird13  have:pdf 
september 2016 by elwarre
✢ Shine Like the Sun
"Prompt-fill. An accident leaves Spock with amnesia. His last memory is bringing a cadet up on charges for cheating on the Kobayashi Maru - a cadet who, to his disgust, is now his bondmate." (25,000 words)
  james_kirk  spock  leonard_mccoy  spock(prime)  nyota_uhura  kirk/spock  protective!kirk  hurt!kirk  bottom!kirk  amnesiac!spock  asshole!spock  guilty!spock  top!spock  heartbreaking  angst  hurt/comfort  amnesia  self_loathing  bonding/soulmates  pon_farr  established!relationship  st:fiveyearmission  fandom:startrek(aos)  author:kyliselle 
september 2016 by elwarre
Mindless Trinket
"The kingdom of Beacon is separated into the three Circles; The First Circle is the stronghold of the Court; the Second holds the key to trade and business among the majority of its people; the Third holds the dredges of humanity, barely able to live on the rationing during the war against the Argent armies. Stiles does what he must to survive and protect his loved ones, which begs the question: How much could the life of a whore be worth?" (66,871 words) First in an unfinished series, so the story is left open-ended. LOTS of warnings for Stiles's experiences in a dark world.
stiles_stilinski  derek_hale  erica_reyes  alan_deaton  vernon_boyd  melissa_mccall  scott_mccall  isaac_lahey  allison_argent  laura_hale  talia_hale  lydia_martin  adrian_harris  deucalion  kali  sheriff_stilinski  jackson_whittemore  stiles/derek  scott/allison  erica/boyd  lydia/jackson  hooker!stiles  hurt!stiles  abused!stiles  whipped!stiles  tortured!stiles  arrested!stiles  bottom!stiles  protective!derek  royalty!derek  pining!derek  top!derek  protective!erica  fairytale/fantasy  friendship  angst  prostitution  abuse:child  noncon/dubcon  whipping  torture  incarceration  self_loathing  issues:class  fighting/sparring  underage  pining  kink:marking  first_time  series/verse  tw:au:no!fire  tw:au:historical/fantasy  fandom:teenwolf  author:thecriminal  have:pdf 
september 2016 by elwarre
✢ Chasm
"Steve pulls his missing, presumed dead best friend into his circle of super heroes and starts working to undo the physical and mental damage Hydra has done. It’s not easy, and it’s not pleasant. But it would probably be a lot more effective if Bucky weren’t keeping secrets, and if he could figure out how to interpret Bucky’s mood swings." (77,288 words) Part 2 of Ipseity
  bucky_barnes  steve_rogers  sam_wilson  natasha_romanov  tony_stark  clint_barton  maria_hill  nick_fury  bruce_banner  thor  sharon_carter  steve/bucky  bamf!bucky  protective!bucky  sick!bucky  ptsd!bucky  interrogated!bucky  pining!bucky  protective!steve  understanding!steve  pining!steve  character_study  angst  friendship  action  languages:multiple  illness  illness:mental  mpd/did  ptsd  self_loathing  interrogation  clinic/hospital  confession/secrets  issues:gender/sexuality  pining  established!relationship  series/verse  fandom:marvel  author:skyisgray  have:pdf 
august 2016 by elwarre
✢ Redshift
"They're still reeling from Dean's stint in Purgatory, the Trials are tearing them apart, the world hangs in the balance (again)—and Dean wants to get a pool table and have a sex marathon. Of course he does." (27,087 words)
  sam_winchester  dean_winchester  sam/dean  hurt!sam  hallucinating!sam  jealous!sam  guilty!sam  protective!dean  understanding!dean  hurt/comfort  angst  hallucinations  purgatory  self_loathing  trials  bunker  jealousy  hothothot  kink:switching  kink:bdsm  sex:rough  sex:shower  sex:car  established!relationship  spn:season:8  fandom:spn  author:road_rhythm  have:pdf 
july 2016 by elwarre
All that Shimmers is Sure to Fade
"It was once said that fame means millions of people having the wrong idea of who you are. But the misconception works both ways. Supermodel Jared Padalecki has come to the cold realization that he's nothing like the down home, All-American boy whose visage adorns the pages of magazines and faces of billboards. Nothing in his life is real and the beautiful people that surround him are the ugliest part of it all. On the night he decides to run, a mysterious stranger kidnaps him under the cover of darkness. A man with a hatred of everything Jared represents, a man with a growling voice, a man with a name—Jensen." (20,800 words)
jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  samantha_ferris  sandra_mccoy  chad_michael_murray  jared/jensen  model!jared  depressed!jared  kidnapped!jared  drugged!jared  top!jared  kidnapper!jensen  hurt!jensen  depressed!jensen  bottom!jensen  angst  depression  permanent!injury  self_loathing  selfharm  kidnapping  noncon/dubcon  drugs:nonconsensual  industry:fashion  clinic/hospital  first_time  fandom:rpf  author:lotrabc 
july 2016 by elwarre
Looking for Shooting Stars
"Spock and his family have moved to Earth. He has accepted this. But when Jim Kirk moves in next door and Spock accidentally gets a glimpse of the younger boy's pain, Spock refuses to accept the fact that he cannot help. It may be illogical, but he will unravel the mystery that is Jim Kirk." (56,736 words) First in an ongoing series.
james_kirk  spock  winona_kirk  frank(startrek)  amanda_grayson  sarek  kirk/spock  kirk/ofc  student!kirk  hurt!kirk  abused!kirk  drugged!kirk  raped!kirk  bullied!kirk  ptsd!kirk  reluctant!kirk  student!spock  protective!spock  pining!spock  friendship  hurt/comfort  angst  drugs:nonconsensual  abuse:child  noncon/dubcon  hunger/starvation  eating_disorder  ptsd  bullying  homophobia  self_loathing  highschool  mindmeld  telepathy  bonding/soulmates  escape/rescue  clinic/hospital  first_time  series/verse  st:preseries(aos)  fandom:startrek(aos)  author:miss_meh 
july 2016 by elwarre
✢ In This Sunrise
"Sam dates guys sometimes. Sometimes. Never a girl before or any at all yet, but hey, that doesn't automatically mean he's gay, right? Nobody cares anyway. Surely nobody would - if they knew." (93,196 words)
  sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  sam/dean  sam/omc  bamf!sam  protective!sam  hurt!sam  pining!sam  jealous!sam  bottom!sam  protective!dean  hurt!dean  pining!dean  top!dean  clueless!john  neglectful!john  asshole!john  angst  self_loathing  homophobia  issues:gender/sexuality  highschool  underage  slowburn  pining  jealousy  hothothot  kink:toys  kink:rimming  kink:switching  sex:car  sex:shower  sex:rough  first_time  spn:preseries  fandom:spn  author:hellhoundsprey  have:pdf 
july 2016 by elwarre
Banging Monsters
"Horror and shame pulsed through him when he remembered that one moment where he’d seen his black eyes in the mirror; underneath all the confusion and terror a warm liquid emotion pooled low in his stomach, something Dean now recognized as relief." (4200 words)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  sam/dean  protective!sam  top!sam  hurt!dean  depressed!dean  pining!dean  bottom!dean  angst  heartbreaking  bunker  markofcain  depression  self_loathing  pining  first_time  spn:season:10  spn:ep:10.17(inside_man)  fandom:spn  author:frozen_delight 
july 2016 by elwarre
✢ The Morning After
"Jim convinces Spock to take shore leave with him on Risa, hoping the time together will help re-solidify their bond of friendship after some recent tension. Meanwhile, Spock convinces himself he's on Risa for one reason and one reason only, to prevent his wayward captain from getting into trouble. After a passionately illogical night of Romulan Ale and chocolate infused liquor, everything changes when Jim wakes with something other than a hangover filling his head. Something he's sure neither he nor Spock can handle. Because if Jim knows anything for sure, it's that his messed up thoughts belong nowhere near Spock's clean, ordered mind." (50,381 words)
  james_kirk  spock  leonard_mccoy  nyota_uhura  kirk/spock  hurt!kirk  guilty!kirk  pining!kirk  bottom!kirk  protective!spock  understanding!spock  pining!spock  top!spock  angst  friendship  misunderstanding  abuse:child(past)  hunger/starvation  tarsus_iv  self_loathing  dreams/visions  telepathy  mindmeld  confession/secrets  pining  bonding/soulmates  hothothot  sex:telepathic  first_time  st:fiveyearmission  fandom:startrek(aos)  author:noodleinabarrel  have:pdf 
july 2016 by elwarre
✢ Triangles
"It is a truth (almost) universally acknowledged that a single man sucking dick is more gay than a man getting his dick sucked. This is why Charles Xavier's knees are scuffing against cheap hotel carpet, why his palms are pressed against thin hotel wallpaper. It isn't the first time he's been in this position, and it isn't even his first time with Erik. It's never been the other way around, but here's the thing about Charles: he's willing to take one for the team." (2975 words)
  charles_xavier  erik_lehnsherr  charles/erik  understanding!charles  telepath!charles  pining!charles  reluctant!erik  homophobic!erik  pining!erik  pov:charles  character_study  heartbreaking  homophobia  self_loathing  telepathy  first_time  x:firstclass  fandom:xmen  author:zombieboyband 
june 2016 by elwarre
"In 1965, Erik Lehnsherr has infiltrated the NYPD for his own purposes -- but his powers make him a brilliant detective. Yet that's not why FBI agent Charles Xavier has sought him out. It's because the mysterious killer they're both trying to find is murdering people like them: other mutants. Their search for a madman binds them together. Their inner demons may tear them apart. But the greatest danger comes when the killer they're looking for looks back...." (43,521 words)
charles_xavier  erik_lehnsherr  moira_mactaggert  armando_munoz  angel_salvadore  charles/erik  erik/omc  profiler!charles  telepath!charles  understanding!charles  hurt!charles  kidnapped!charles  bottom!charles  officer!erik  hurt!erik  homophobic!erik  reluctant!erik  bottom!erik  top!erik  historical  angst  casefic  serial_killers  fbi/police  kidnapping  noncon/dubcon  self_loathing  abuse:child(past)  first_time  x:au:lawenforcement  fandom:xmen  author:yahtzee 
june 2016 by elwarre
Arms Wide Open
“Dad’s on a hunting trip and he hasn’t been home in a few days.” Sound familiar? Sure, except this time, 18-year-old Dean confronts Bobby with the news. Because Sam? Sammy was taken when he was six – vanished off the face of the earth – and despite Dean’s best efforts, they've never been able to find him. John thinks Sam might be dead, but Dean can’t bring himself to give up hope that maybe, one day, he’ll have Sammy back at his side. (87,000 words)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  bobby_singer  castiel  zachariah  gen  powers!sam  kidnapped!sam  hurt!sam  tortured!sam  abused!sam  guilty!dean  protective!dean  protective!bobby  hurt/comfort  angst  kidnapping  torture  abuse:child  self_loathing  recovery  kitsune  ghosts  demons  spn:preseries  spn:au:raised!apart  fandom:spn  author:soserendipity  need:pdf 
june 2016 by elwarre
✢ Non Timebo Mala
"This is my very AU version of the Colt's making. It's completely a child of my wild imaginings, thus expect anachronisms, improbable situations, and flagrant display of personal fanon. This can be seen as an alternate universe, or an alternate timeline." (102,167 words)
  sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  bobby_singer  caleb  missouri_moseley  sam/dean  hunter!sam  hooker!sam  protective!sam  hurt!sam  raped!sam  bottom!sam  blacksmith!dean  protective!dean  understanding!dean  pining!dean  top!dean  asshole!john  neglectful!john  angst  hurt/comfort  prostitution  noncon/dubcon  homophobia  self_loathing  recovery  magic  demons  demonblood  dreams/visions  slowburn  pining  hothothot  kink:switching  first_time  spn:au:raised!apart  fandom:spn  author:roxymissrose  have:pdf 
june 2016 by elwarre
Chasing Darkness
"Discharged from the military after the war and unable to find a regular job, Jensen and Dani end up on JD’s mining planet Wora. It’s one of the most hostile environments in the Old Galaxy, but the pay is astronomical. The job sounds easy enough: protect the miners. While battling the demons of his past, Jensen meets Jared, a beautiful, sought after companion, who is isolated by his own secrets. Jared had come to Wora, dragged by Chad, with the need to make some serious money. It doesn’t take Jensen long to figure out Jared’s secret and he has to decide how much he’s willing to risk to protect him." (85,000 words)
jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  danneel_harris  chad_michael_murray  jeff_morgan  jared/jensen  jared/omc  powers!jared  hooker!jared  bottom!jared  powers!jensen  military!jensen  bamf!jensen  protective!jensen  top!jensen  action  angst  schmoop  scifi  prostitution  dreams/visions  self_loathing  military  spacetravel  first_time  fandom:rpf  author:ashtraythief  have:pdf 
june 2016 by elwarre
✢ Once There Was A Way To Get Back Homeward
"Jared leads an elite counterterrorist team. When he meets the new guy, Jensen, sparks fly. Jared knows getting involved is a bad idea, but Jensen's persistence is hard to resist. Missions become more complicated, and when they go wrong - when not everyone makes it out, and what happens after is the stuff of nightmares - the consequences may be too much to deal with." (23,093 words)
  jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  aldis_hodge  jeff_morgan  christian_kane  steve_carlson  jared/jensen  bamf!jared  military!jared  hurt!jared  kidnapped!jared  tortured!jared  abused!jared  depressed!jared  reluctant!jared  protective!jared  bottom!jared  bamf!jensen  military!jensen  protective!jensen  top!jensen  action  hurt/comfort  angst  military  torture  kidnapping  abuse:child(past)  depression  self_loathing  first_time  fandom:rpf  author:crimsonepitaph  have:pdf 
june 2016 by elwarre
Find His Way Back
"Jared is lost. He is still trying to heal and work out what he is going to with his life when it all come crashing down around his ears. The Ackles are wonderful and Jared doesn’t want to let them down. However, since most of his life he’s disappointed people he really wonders if he has a chance. Jensen wants to help Jared find his way back before he’s lost forever." (18,600 words) Sequel to "Brand New Start"
jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  jared/jensen  student!jared  orphan!jared  hurt!jared  abused!jared  raped!jared  homeless!jared  bullied!jared  bottom!jared  protective!jensen  guilty!jensen  top!jensen  angst  hurt/comfort  abuse:child(past)  noncon/dubcon  bullying  homophobia  homelessness  misunderstanding  selfharm  self_loathing  highschool  cps/fostercare  farm/ranch  clinic/hospital  fostersiblings/stepsiblings  established!relationship  series/verse  fandom:rpf  author:gestaltrose  need:pdf 
june 2016 by elwarre
Brand New Start
"Jared Padalecki is one messed up kid, after his parent die he his tossed from Foster home to Foster home slowly losing everyone he loves. He's given one last chance with the Ackles. Can he come to peace with his past? Will he admit that he's attracted to Jensen? AU story of a hurt boy who's trying to find some peace and maybe, if he's lucky, love." (21,000 words) Sequel: "Find His Way Back"
jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  jared/jensen  student!jared  orphan!jared  hurt!jared  abused!jared  raped!jared  guilty!jared  protective!jensen  pining!jensen  angst  hurt/comfort  friendship  self_loathing  cps/fostercare  abuse:child(past)  noncon/dubcon  prostitution  homelessness  homophobia  recovery  highschool  farm/ranch  fostersiblings/stepsiblings  pining  slowburn  underage  first_time  series/verse  fandom:rpf  author:gestaltrose  need:pdf 
june 2016 by elwarre
Shouting Out Loud: Chasing Rainbows
"Sixteen months after Jared’s abuser was sent to prison and Chad and Sophia’s wedding, Jared and Jensen have graduated, gotten jobs, and are recently married. They have everything they ever wanted, but are learning that each of life’s victories come with new, grander challenges." Sequel to "Shouting Out Loud"
jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  sophia_bush  chad_michael_murray  tom_welling  jared/jensen  artist!jared  punk!jared  protective!jared  hurt!jared  depressed!jared  officer!jensen  protective!jensen  understanding!jensen  hurt!jensen  hurt/comfort  angst  domesticity  addiction  depression  self_loathing  recovery  art/photography  fbi/police  kink:switching  kink:crossdressing  established!relationship  series/verse  fandom:rpf  author:blynnk 
june 2016 by elwarre
Between the Lines of Fear and Blame
"In the hunt for Lucifer, Sam is hurt and Dean has to embark on a quest to find his brother in more ways than one." (44,364 words)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  bobby_singer  gen  hurt!sam  addict!sam  protective!dean  protective!bobby  angst  selfharm  self_loathing  resentment  addiction  demonblood  demons  dreams/visions  clinic/hospital  spn:season:5  fandom:spn  author:faye_dartmouth  need:pdf 
june 2016 by elwarre
"'The only difference between you and a demon, Sam, is that your Hell is right here.' Over a year out of the Cage, and Sam's beginning to realize that Brady might be right. At least in Hell, he could pretend Dean still trusted him, still cared for him." (10,741 words)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  bobby_singer  samuel_campbell  gwen_campbell  gen  hurt!sam  helltrauma!sam  ptsd!sam  asshole!dean  angst  heartbreaking  self_loathing  helltrauma  ptsd  misunderstanding  spn:season:6  fandom:spn  author:liron_aria 
may 2016 by elwarre
Of Mice and Coffee
"Boy meets boy. The only problems? One of them is painfully shy and still recuperating from a bad relationship and the other one is cursed with a belligerent cat. Somehow it all works out though." (27,335 words)
jared_padalecki  jensen_ackles  genevieve_cortese  christian_kane  steve_carlson  misha_collins  jeff_morgan  jared/jensen  jared/jeff  shy!jared  hurt!jared  abused!jared  ptsd!jared  bottom!jared  understanding!jensen  top!jensen  asshole!jeff  abusive!jeff  hurt/comfort  schmoop  abuse:domestic  noncon/dubcon  ptsd  self_loathing  animal_shelter  bakery/coffeeshop  first_time  fandom:rpf  author:ashtraythief  wip 
may 2016 by elwarre
You Never Forget Your First
"It was a night of firsts all over. A night where, for the first time, Dean told Sam he didn't want to be anywhere near his brother, out loud." Post Lucifer Rising. (comment-fic)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  gen  hurt!sam  guilty!sam  abusive!dean  asshole!dean  guilty!dean  protective!dean  hurt/comfort  angst  self_loathing  spn:season:4  fandom:spn  author:authoressnebula 
may 2016 by elwarre
When the Nightmares Start
"Don't," Derek snapped. "You haven't lied to me since the second time we met, Stiles. Don't start now. Not for him." Stiles sighed, stopped trying to smile, and as the facade fell, he seemed to shrink, to curl in on himself. And the smaller he got, the less Derek recognized him; like he was just a shade of the man who Derek had seen hold up, and back, werewolves with twice his muscle mass. It was unnerving. Wrong. (4188 words)
stiles_stilinski  derek_hale  stiles/omc  stiles/derek  hurt!stiles  abused!stiles  protective!derek  angst  hurt/comfort  abuse:domestic  abuse:emotional/psychological  self_loathing  escape/rescue  clinic/hospital  preslash  fandom:teenwolf  author:wolftraps 
may 2016 by elwarre
You Always Take it Further Than I Ever Can
"Derek finds something of Rafa's that makes things a bit more complicated." (8,218 words) Part 12 of the Starts with F series.
stiles_stilinski  derek_hale  sheriff_stilinski  stiles/derek  angst  friendship  self_loathing  noncon/dubcon  blackmail  revenge  established!relationship  series/verse  fandom:teenwolf  author:remainnameless  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
We All Know How to Fake It
"With Derek being held at the station, Stiles is left reeling from the past twenty-four hours until Lydia steps in." (7963 words) Part 10 of the Starts with F series (endgame Sterek)
stiles_stilinski  derek_hale  lydia_martin  stiles/derek  hurt!stiles  ptsd!stiles  guilty!stiles  protective!derek  arrested!derek  bamf!lydia  understanding!lydia  angst  friendship  self_loathing  ptsd  incarceration  confession/secrets  revenge  preslash  series/verse  fandom:teenwolf  author:remainnameless  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
We Fuck Till We Come to Conclusions
"Now that Stiles has a plan, it's supposed to be different. He's supposed to feel like he's the one calling the shots, but Rafa gets rid of that notion. The only safe place he really has is Derek." (7994 words) Part 5 of the Starts with F series (endgame Sterek - preslash in this part)
stiles_stilinski  derek_hale  rafael_mccall  melissa_mccall  stiles/rafael  stiles/derek  guilty!stiles  bottom!stiles  understanding!derek  top!rafael  protective!melissa  angst  friendship  self_loathing  highschool  underage  sex:rough  kink:daddykink  kink:d/s  kink:scentmarking  preslash  established!relationship  series/verse  fandom:teenwolf  author:remainnameless  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
Wish You Were the One that Got Away
"Less than two months after Stiles ends things with Rafa, Scott's bitten by a werewolf. There's no way Stiles could've known that it would start a chain of events that would make their paths cross yet again." (9127 words) Part 3 of the Starts with F series (endgame Sterek)
stiles_stilinski  rafael_mccall  derek_hale  scott_mccall  sheriff_stilinski  stiles/rafael  guilty!stiles  angst  dark  self_loathing  underage  sex:phone  kink:dirtytalk  kink:daddykink  established!relationship  series/verse  tw:season:1  fandom:teenwolf  author:remainnameless  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
Wanna Break You Down So Badly
"Stiles is set on total destruction, and this time, it's going to work. The sex is just improvisation." (7826 words) Part 2 of the Starts with F series (endgame Sterek)
stiles_stilinski  rafael_mccall  stiles/rafael  spanked!stiles  guilty!stiles  bottom!stiles  top!rafael  angst  dark  pwp  self_loathing  blackmail  text/email  hothothot  kink:d/s  kink:dirtytalk  kink:toys  kink:rimming  kink:daddykink  kink:praisekink  kink:spanking  kink:bdsm  sex:phone  established!relationship  tw:preseries  fandom:teenwolf  series/verse  author:remainnameless  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
✢ Baba O'Riley and Eleanor Rigby Walk Into a Bar
"Mary never died and if the supernatural exists, it leaves the Winchesters alone. When Dean Winchester was four years old he almost lost his younger brother for the first time to a fire. When Dean Winchester was eighteen he almost lost his brother a second time to a full bathtub and a pack of sleeping pills, citing some decidedly unbrotherly feelings in his suicide note. At twenty-two he's about to lose him for a third time to Stanford University. He and Sam's therapist sit down and talk out the chain of events leading up to and proceeding after what Dean considers to be the worst day of his life. He figures out a few things along the way." (33,300 words)
  sam_winchester  dean_winchester  john_winchester  mary_winchester  sam/dean  sam/omc  hurt!sam  pining!sam  bottom!sam  clueless!dean  reluctant!dean  possessive!dean  jealous!dean  top!dean  hurt/comfort  angst  self_loathing  selfharm  issues:gender/sexuality  highschool  pining  jealousy  hothothot  first_time  spn:preseries  spn:au:no!supernatural  fandom:spn  author:thecapn  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
✢ The Only Thing That's Real
"The destruction of the wall in Sam’s head leaves him veering dizzily back and forth between reality and vivid flashbacks of the Pit. Caught in the nightmare world, Sam’s terrified, desperate, and dangerous. Most people would walk away. But Dean Winchester’s not most people." (27,000 words)
  sam_winchester  dean_winchester  sam/dean  dean/ofc  dean/omc  hurt!sam  ptsd!sam  helltrauma!sam  hallucinating!sam  guilty!sam  jealous!sam  voyeur!sam  pining!sam  top!sam  protective!dean  understanding!dean  pining!dean  bottom!dean  hurt/comfort  angst  pov:outsider  self_loathing  ptsd  hallucinations  helltrauma  lucifers_cage  pining  jealousy  hothothot  kink:oralfixation  kink:voyeurism  first_time  spn:season:7  author:runedgirl  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
Prompt: "Charles had an abusive childhood (like in the comics, but worse) and when he finally got away, he repressed everything behind mental walls, to the point he doesn't really remember anything about it. After the events of the movie, his mental state deteriorates, and those walls come down." (7748 words)
charles_xavier  erik_lehnsherr  raven  emma_frost  charles/erik  protective!charles  telepath!charles  hurt!charles  guilty!charles  depressed!charles  lonely!charles  protective!erik  guilty!erik  mansion!fic  angst  hurt/comfort  depression  loneliness  self_loathing  abuse:child(past)  noncon/dubcon  telepathy  recovery  first_time  series/verse  x:firstclass  fandom:xmen  author:tokidoki_fish  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
"Sam has only one rule, really, when it comes to sex. Lights off." (3260 words)
sam_winchester  sam/ofc  hurt!sam  scarred!sam  angst  character_study  self_loathing  scars  fandom:spn  author:steeplechasers  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
Reading into the Past
"This picks up after Sacrifice, and now that S9 has premiered it's AU. The trials are over, and, even though the gates of hell aren't closed, for the first time Sam and Dean are truly on the same page. They have a real home in the batcave, and have formed a relationship that makes them both happy. But it’s been a long, hard road to get there full of secrets, miscommunication, and manipulation from both sides. When Charlie opens the door to their virtual life, meaning the rest of the books online and the small community that knows they are real, they are shocked by the way they were both truly played. It gives them an insight to each other that goes a long way towards healing old hurts. They manage to clear the air, figure out just how bad and worse the options they had to choose from really were, and they find each other in a whole new way." (21,424 words)
sam_winchester  dean_winchester  charlie_bradbury  sam/dean  guilty!sam  understanding!dean  understanding!charlie  angst  hurt/comfort  schmoop  domesticity  spnbooks  wincest!discovered  charlie_finds_out  bunker  self_loathing  selfharm  kink:switching  established!relationship  spn:season:9  fandom:spn  author:jasmineisland  have:pdf 
may 2016 by elwarre
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