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Twitter
My father was the fire marshal for my city growing up, and when I was young I couldn't understand why he spent so m…
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5 hours ago
Twitter
Been fermenting some sweet corn with green cayenne chiles since September. Just tasted them. Dayum! Sweet-sour-spic…
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9 hours ago
Twitter
Ready to host the Award Finalists Reading tonight with 👑.
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10 hours ago
Twitter
Today I had to unexpectedly say goodbye to this very good boy. I am beyond crushed and will miss him with all my he…
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11 hours ago
Twitter
time to set our sights on the other city i call home: san francisco. Should be pretty simple to make it work there.…
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13 hours ago
Twitter
I hope I'm just reading this wrong. Otherwise it's just devastating to think about for how many people "abolish ICE…
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13 hours ago
Twitter
me and kj kind of always harbored the fantasy that we could move back to nyc and get a little apartment in Queens a…
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13 hours ago
Twitter
Tixs are moving fast for our three-night run Nov. 29, Nov. 30, & Dec 1 with ,
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13 hours ago
Twitter
hahaha. The think's the DC area is now going to become a tech hub. How is that Dulles Technology Co…
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14 hours ago
Twitter
[reading crime and punishment]

me: holy shit, that was a crime, i wonder if there'll be a punishm-

[ten pages lat…
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16 hours ago
Twitter
We’re in discussions with them about squirt bottle drones 🚁
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16 hours ago
Twitter
Most weather apps report that today will be “cloudy”, but surprisingly Comcast knows what’s up.
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16 hours ago
Twitter
“This annual guide, compiled after 34 weeks of travel and almost 600 meals in 36 cities, aims to accomplish somethi…
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16 hours ago
Twitter
The French may not be buying much American wine, but it’s not because of high tariffs.
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19 hours ago
Twitter
Torn about the Amazon decision. I think that the company exploited a weakness in our political structure for their…
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yesterday
Twitter
“EVERYONE KNOWS PROPERLY-CARED-FOR SOY CANDLES LAST LONGER,” I cried to no one, literally lighting $28 on fire
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yesterday
Twitter
Proud of the art I contribute to this world
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yesterday
Twitter
Barrett Foa from NCIS:LA follows and I AM DED
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yesterday
Twitter
SNL SKETCH, 2019: The far-right sure are a bunch of jerks, huh? Let's disarm their hate speech with witty repartee.…
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yesterday
Twitter
True for all projects. Executable sample or failing test case does wonders. If I can debug a failure I can fix it.…
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2 days ago
Twitter
Um you literally referred to LA as a jungle
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2 days ago
Twitter
The NFL cares about player safety
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2 days ago
Twitter
Got back from the road last night just in time to take this beauty out for some late night ramen in celebration of…
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2 days ago
Twitter
I think it's about time for me to go to bed.
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3 days ago
Twitter
Short ribs and a twice baked potato baked in a marrow bone with escargot and bone marrow regram📸by 8imz…
GetJag  from twitter_favs
3 days ago
Twitter
This may be the most incredible two-tweet sequence you ever see from a writer for
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3 days ago
Untitled (http://www.nba.com/)
This may be the most incredible two-tweet sequence you ever see from a writer for
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3 days ago
Twitter
We're spending our Saturday with at the . Doors open at 7pm and we go on at 8pm.
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3 days ago
Twitter
We’re leaving our house because of the fire and the only stuff I’m taking are things that remind me of my ex becaus…
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3 days ago
Twitter
What’s worse: crying at the end of Coco or my wife saying stuff like “why are those guys glowing, seems silly” and…
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3 days ago
Twitter
🎶 When he road trip good I take his ass to Red Lobster 🎶
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3 days ago
Twitter
I thought these were crawfish. 🦐
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4 days ago
Twitter
Brewed batch 983 yesterday. Batch 1000 is coming up pretty quickly. Brewing a style we've never made before with a…
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4 days ago
Twitter
This reminds me of the tracking shots from Children of Men. Fucking hell.
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4 days ago
Twitter
For everyone commenting Ritalin or adderall I’m glad you’ve found success there but my body doesn’t metabolize them…
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4 days ago
Twitter
Good morning, Shanghai. Wait, no that’s not right.
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4 days ago
Twitter
we walked out of a Philly DSA meeting to find Jeb! on the street and got a picture the moment we told him we had ju…
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5 days ago
Twitter
This was a bit from Ally McBeal in the 90s and I have been thinking about it for twenty years.
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5 days ago
Twitter
In a true Milkshake Duck prophecy, it will soon be revealed that this duck committed a bunch of murders while he wa…
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5 days ago
Twitter
🍙 comes home: “Mommy the neighbors gave me glitter!!”

Me: “Our relationship isn’t strong enough to handle the intr…
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5 days ago
Twitter
Say hello to codename 23E, so named for the airplane seat from which I was forced to watch her being born over Hang…
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5 days ago
Twitter
not even 24 hours after the YIMBY libertarian queen loses her san francisco supervisor run their slack has republic…
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6 days ago
Twitter
i wanna put my auto-texter (sent 6000+ GOTV texts thru Google Voice clients for free w/o being flagged as spam) on…
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6 days ago
Twitter
[Ace Hotel Restaurant, Pittsburgh]

Saeed, loudly, to me: "You fucking bitch!"

*A loud silence*

Saeed, looking ov…
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6 days ago
Twitter
this headline is art. I have tears rolling down my face
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6 days ago
Twitter
It’s just my dad... chill
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6 days ago
Twitter
Just extraordinarily impressed with these people. Over the next decade I hope we realize the model they've laid out…
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6 days ago
Twitter
How dare those people vote for what they consider to be their best interests!

LONG LIVE THE IRREVOCA…
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6 days ago
Twitter
If you didn’t vote, that’s your choice, but making a proclamation on social media being like “fuck you if you think…
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6 days ago
Twitter
kotlinx.serialization is Kotlin’s solution for data serialization. It supports JSON, CBOR and Protobuf, works on JV…
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6 days ago
Twitter
When an instarone opens a rare bottle and becomes the belle of the bottleshare for 3 full minutes while giving stra…
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6 days ago
Twitter
Going to bed with this: Harley Rouda is leading in the Califonia 48th. A first-time Democrat could flip the seat in…
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7 days ago
Twitter
ok it is time for me to hibernate
be well my frens
take good care
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7 days ago
Twitter
This is the good shit I love
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7 days ago
Twitter
Thanks for the congrats but let me be clear--I didn't do shit. I sent some texts and gave some speeches. People fro…
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7 days ago
Twitter
If this turns out not to be the case and some drunk dude just played me I am going to try to rip a parking meter ou…
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7 days ago
Twitter
Legitimately a step toward emancipation for thousands of arrested, detained, and incarcerated people in Houston. I'…
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7 days ago
Twitter
At the Reclaim Idaho watch party. Prop 2 up 67%, but lots of time to go. A whole community turned out. Parents, fri…
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7 days ago
Twitter
Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. The nytimes gave us an in-depth article displaying the trump family financials an…
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7 days ago
Twitter
I was trying to be positive and optimistic this whole time, but oh my god - you don’t think you’re actually going t…
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7 days ago
Twitter
Waiting for election results like
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7 days ago
Twitter
Whoa i just got in an for Carlos. Also a grey Prius. Same pick up place. Thanks to the driver for taking me t…
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7 days ago
Twitter
Small clarification:

When I made a post earlier gently poking fun at selfies with I Voted stickers, I wasn’t talki…
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7 days ago
Twitter
"Craft is here to stay"

Oh thank god, we were worried.
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7 days ago
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