darthjamtart + length:5k-10k   33

what a way to make a living
Without any more assignments coming from Downstairs, Crowley is struck with a bad case of the doldrums.

It takes a bit of trial and error, but eventually a solution is found.

(Or: the one where Crowley becomes an Uber driver.)
author:attheborder  fandom:GoodOmens  pairing:Crowley/Aziraphale  genre:continuation  feelings:loltastic  rating:T  length:5k-10k 
july 2019 by darthjamtart
such surpassing brightness
The revelation that Aziraphale might have been in love with him for thousands of years is surprising. The fact that literal books have been written on the subject comes as even more of a shock.
author:Handful_of_Silence  fandom:GoodOmens  pairing:Crowley/Aziraphale  length:5k-10k  rating:G  genre:get-together  feelings:fluff 
june 2019 by darthjamtart
Not So Blue
“I think I’ve been doing it wrong,” Crowley said. “I mean, it’s nice but it’s not all that.”

“Perhaps you’ve just been doing it with the wrong person,” Aziraphale said archly, and before Crowley could react at all, he had raised his hand to order a bottle of Veuve Clicquot and arrange for another to be sent to a table where a couple had just gotten quietly engaged. He hated showy proposals. Crowley, of course, had invented the flash mob, and then regretted it after he was caught in the middle of one six times in a single day when he was only trying to lounge about London in a decorative fashion.

Aziraphale presses his suit. Crowley mostly has a lot of questions.
author:pineapplecrushface  fandom:GoodOmens  pairing:Crowley/Aziraphale  rating:M  genre:continuation  genre:get-together  feelings:fluff  length:5k-10k 
june 2019 by darthjamtart
The Hellfire Club
Circa 1718, Crowley overhears Gabriel announce Aziraphale’s to be promoted back to heaven. What’s a demon to do but thwart the plans of heaven?
author:AMarguerite  fandom:GoodOmens  rating:G  pairing:Crowley/Aziraphale  length:5k-10k  genre:backstory  feelings:loltastic 
june 2019 by darthjamtart
Bakes to Die For
While digitizing the BBC archives, an intern who asked to remain anonymous discovered a transcript of a lost episode of the Great British Bake Off. The paper could neither be photocopied nor scanned as all the copies came out blank; and the actual footage was never found.
fandom:GreatBritishBakeOff  length:5k-10k  rating:T  pairing:none  feelings:loltastic  genre:screenplay  yuletide 
december 2018 by darthjamtart
no one can stop me, not even gravity or nasa
“Fuck you,” Leia says. “Who said anything about getting married? Did Luke say anything about getting married?”

“Luke is not involved,” Luke says, not looking up.

“Hey, Luke is not involved,” Han says, pointing at her. She’s going to bite his finger off, then they’ll see how much pointing he can do with it. “This is about you and me, princess.”
author:magneticwave  fandom:StarWars  pairing:Han/Leia  rating:G  length:5k-10k  feelings:loltastic  genre:continuation 
september 2018 by darthjamtart
never felt inadequate a day in my life
Piper was gazing into the bubbling depths of her champagne as though its very existence underwhelmed her. At such an early stage, Greenmantle was not yet to know that everything underwhelmed Piper; that Piper suffered, in fact, from a chronic lack of whelm. “I’m sick of this place," she said, with sudden vehemence. "I’m sick of all these men. I’m sick of all of it. Everything. Don’t bore me.”

Greenmantle told her, “I’m congenitally incapable of boring anyone.”

“Prove it,” said Piper.

(Nothing in the world has ever proved quite as difficult to obtain as Piper.)
author:suitablyskippy  fandom:RavenCycle  feelings:hmm  genre:backstory  rating:T  pairing:Piper/Colin  length:5k-10k 
july 2015 by darthjamtart
Wishing Well
Thor had been staring the whole time. Now he flung himself off the table and across the room. He seized Loki by the shoulders. "Brother!" he said, ecstatically. "Has the spell — the spell has worked!"

Loki stared back at him. "What spell?" he spat. And added, choked off, "...dear brother."
author:astolat  fandom:avengers  feelings:loltastic  genre:crack  rating:T  pairing:loki/thor  length:5k-10k 
november 2013 by darthjamtart
Dungeons & Hawkeyes
In which this whole dungeon thing really isn’t working for Kate Bishop, there are far too many nicknames from the Victorian era, socks are vitally important, and Clint insists he is Han Solo in this situation.
author:inmyriadbits  fandom:avengers  pairing:none  rating:G  length:5k-10k  feelings:fluff  genre:action/adventure 
october 2013 by darthjamtart
come around again (only want to say goodbye)
"Why do you let him use your personal line?" Jack snaps at Chilton one particularly trying day, when Will has returned from a twenty minute bathroom break prompted by the buzzing of his phone to study crime scene photographs with bright interest and upbeat speculations on the psychopathy of their serial killer. "The length of an inmate's calls is supposed to be restricted!"

"I can't say no to him!" Chilton says crazily. "He will eat my face right off my skull!"

"You only say that because you know he's done it before!" Jack says, and hangs up so that he can glare at Will without Chilton's stupidity distracting him.
author:hito  fandom:hannibal  feelings:loltastic  genre:crack  rating:T  length:5k-10k  pairing:will/hannibal 
august 2013 by darthjamtart
The one where Bond really, really isn't used to sleeping with people who don't tragically die soon afterward.
author:recrudescence  fandom:skyfall  pairing:bond/q  rating:E  length:5k-10k  feelings:loltastic  feelings:unf  genre:get-together 
august 2013 by darthjamtart
we knew every line
What happens at the North American Lycanthropy and Leadership Symposium stays at the North American Lycanthropy and Leadership Symposium. // Or, Stiles is totally going to be the best fake boyfriend ever. According to Allison and Lydia, he and Scott rate 17/20 in believability and 19/20 in cuteness. They’ve got this shit locked down.
author:magneticwave  fandom:teen+wolf  feelings:fluff  genre:get-together  length:5k-10k  pairing:derek/stiles  rating:T 
july 2013 by darthjamtart
Thought Even The Bones Would Do
“Bond. How exactly did you involuntarily order a hit on Q?”

“Drinking was involved.”
author:TheCatOnTheMoon  fandom:skyfall  pairing:bond/q  rating:T  length:5k-10k  feelings:loltastic  genre:get-together 
july 2013 by darthjamtart
Sine Qua Non
Season Three-Four gap. The Director has her reservations about the team leader position, McGee and Ziva have a cunning and psychotic plan, and Tony has a mental breakdown. Sort of, anyway.
author:Sequitur  fandom:NCIS  length:5k-10k  feelings:loltastic  genre:mostly-filler  pairing:none  rating:T 
june 2013 by darthjamtart
Killing Elvis
Dr. Liu,

Got your final report yesterday on Project LV-426. I'm amazed. Great work all around. It's been forwarded to the Chair, our friends at the Pentagon, the Defense Appropriations Committee, and DARPA. The acid-resistant armor is something that should really catch their eye.

We're expecting some big grant money from this.



Did you read even the executive summary of my report? There are some interesting biomaterials that we could work with, but I stressed, multiple times, that this creature is far too dangerous to even consider using in military research projects. It's aggressive, stupid, vicious, aggressive, impossible to train, and did I mention aggressive?

. . .their limbs work on hydraulic principles and operate under pressure, which is why they splurt like a popped water balloon when they get hit in those Marine camera feeds we saw. A slight wound to a limb takes them right the hell out of commission, and now your troops have to deal with an insanely aggressive and stupid xenomorphic K-9 unit that oh by the way IS BLEEDING ACID.
author:hradzka  fandom:aliens  genre:epistolary  feelings:loltastic  pairing:none  rating:T  length:5k-10k  yuletide 
february 2013 by darthjamtart
but couldn't good be good enough
"His dad is probably going to tell Stiles not to hang out with us," says Boyd, taking a sip of his Coke.

Isaac gives Derek an utterly betrayed look, and Erica glares at him. "I told you not to wear those sunglasses!" she hisses.

"What if Stiles can't hang out with us any more?" says Isaac wretchedly. "What if Scott doesn't want to hang out with us because --"

"I said those were pedophile sunglasses!" says Erica, in a quiet, piercing whisper that makes Derek's ears hurt.

Boyd continues eating his gyro, which he has laid out on a plate like a salad on a piece of flatbread, methodically picking out the tomatoes, feta and lamb and laying them to the side to eat after the lettuce. Boyd would eat his gyro if there was a bomb going off.
author:lazulisong  fandom:teen+wolf  feelings:fluff  pairing:derek/stiles  rating:G  length:5k-10k  genre:packtivities 
january 2013 by darthjamtart
Jam Tomorrow
However you tell the tale of Bluebeard, he always dies. Sometimes it just takes a little longer to kill him.
fandom:fairytales/folklore  feelings:hmm  rating:M  length:5k-10k 
december 2012 by darthjamtart
"I don't know, Milito," D.W. said, shaking his head. "Maybe God wants us to know that he knows we can all be made a little ridiculous sometimes."
fandom:sparrowverse  feelings:hmm  genre:mostly-filler  rating:M  pairing:none  length:5k-10k 
december 2012 by darthjamtart
All You Have To Do Is Open Your Eyes
“Okay, no,” Pooch says, holding up his hands, “there is no way I’m gambling for money against you and Cougar.”

Jensen frowns, leaning across the table to make wide, concerned eyes at Pooch. “Is it because we’re just that fucking good?” he asks.

“No.” Pooch knocks the edge of the pack once, twice against the table. “It’s because I’m pretty sure you can read each other’s damn minds.”
fandom:losers  feelings:fluff  genre:get-together  rating:E  pairing:jensen/cougar  length:5k-10k 
december 2012 by darthjamtart
Fun and Games
Zo'or gets a lesson in humility courtesy of Liam. Inspired by a comment made by Liam in "First of Its Kind."
author:skieswideopen  fandom:EFC  feelings:loltastic  genre:mostly-filler  rating:G  pairing:none  length:5k-10k 
december 2012 by darthjamtart
Loki Runway
Loki hadn't been observed with a new scepter, and there had yet to be another alien invasion, but he was still a supervillain. SHIELD was on high alert for three months.

Which was when the new season of Project Runway started airing, and one of the designers strutting his stuff in the opening, boldly declaring, "I'll show you mortals how to make it work," set off every facial recognition program SHIELD had.
author:xparrot  fandom:avengers  fandom:project+runway  feelings:loltastic  genre:crossover  pairing:none  rating:G  length:5k-10k 
december 2012 by darthjamtart
tie your napkin 'round your neck, cherie
Stiles has been a teapot for 3,308 days. // Scott skids into the door breathlessly and shouts, “THERE’S A GIRL IN THE CASTLE,” and promptly brains himself on one of the casserole dishes.
author:magneticwave  fandom:teen+wolf  feelings:loltastic  genre:fusion  pairing:derek/stiles  pairing:jackson/lydia  rating:T  length:5k-10k 
september 2012 by darthjamtart
Do You Wanna Date My Avatar?
In hindsight, maybe introducing the local werewolf contingent to the wonderful world of online gaming hadn't exactly been Stiles' best idea.
author:christycorr  fandom:teen+wolf  feelings:loltastic  genre:packtivities  pairing:derek/stiles  rating:T  length:5k-10k 
august 2012 by darthjamtart
Wet Hot Werewolf Summer
Summer Camp AU! In which Derek is the Hot Camp Counselor and Stiles is the Awkward Camper who lusts after him from afar.
author:thefarofixer  fandom:teen+wolf  pairing:derek/stiles  feelings:fluff  rating:M  length:5k-10k  genre:AU  genre:get-together 
august 2012 by darthjamtart
CSI: Beacon Hills
Back when Stiles was in high school Beacon Hills didn't have a crime lab, because they simply didn't need one. Those were the days.
author:jerakeen  fandom:teen+wolf  rating:T  pairing:derek/stiles  feelings:fluff  length:5k-10k  genre:AU  genre:get-together 
august 2012 by darthjamtart
"The next day, Steve and the other Avengers are just settling into a meeting on the flight deck when there's a muffled yell, and Alvarez falls out of the ceiling."

Or, Steve builds a training program, a team, and new life for himself.
author:hetrez  fandom:avengers  rating:G  pairing:none  feelings:loltastic  length:5k-10k  genre:teambuilding 
august 2012 by darthjamtart

related tags

author:AMarguerite  author:astolat  author:attheborder  author:christycorr  author:fiercelydreamed  author:Handful_of_Silence  author:hetrez  author:hito  author:hradzka  author:inmyriadbits  author:jerakeen  author:lazulisong  author:magneticwave  author:peroxidepest17  author:pineapplecrushface  author:recrudescence  author:Sequitur  author:skieswideopen  author:stereobone  author:suitablyskippy  author:TheCatOnTheMoon  author:thefarofixer  author:the_deep_magic  author:Unloyal_Olio  author:vlieger  author:xparrot  fandom:aliens  fandom:avengers  fandom:BlackBooks  fandom:EFC  fandom:fairytales/folklore  fandom:GoodOmens  fandom:GreatBritishBakeOff  fandom:hannibal  fandom:HarryPotter  fandom:leverage  fandom:losers  fandom:NCIS  fandom:project+runway  fandom:RavenCycle  fandom:skyfall  fandom:sparrowverse  fandom:StarWars  fandom:teen+wolf  fandom:white+collar  feelings:fluff  feelings:hmm  feelings:just+breathe  feelings:loltastic  feelings:unf  genre:action/adventure  genre:AU  genre:backstory  genre:continuation  genre:crack  genre:crossover  genre:epistolary  genre:fusion  genre:get-together  genre:mostly-filler  genre:packtivities  genre:porn  genre:screenplay  genre:teambuilding  length:5k-10k  pairing:bond/q  pairing:Crowley/Aziraphale  pairing:derek/stiles  pairing:Han/Leia  pairing:jackson/lydia  pairing:jensen/cougar  pairing:loki/thor  pairing:none  pairing:Piper/Colin  pairing:will/hannibal  rating:E  rating:G  rating:M  rating:T  yuletide 

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