chellexxx + hell   85

Keep This Secret
Sam and Dean travel to the fairy realm hoping to make a deal to get Adam released from the Cage. The price: their shared secret.
SPN  SPN!Non-AU  Slash  Angst  archiveofourown  20000+  Long  Fae/Fairies  Deal  Character-Adam!Milligan  PTSD  Emotionally!hurt  hurt!OC  pining!Sam  Dream/Nightmare  Hell  Season!8  813  Alternate!Universe  Big!Bang  guilty!Sam  First!Time 
19 days ago by chellexxx
I'll Always Be There
Sam does what it takes to save his brother from Michael’s possession. It might be too far, but Dean doesn’t get to choose this time.
SPN  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Season!14  Sam/Dean  First!Time  Character-Castiel  Character-Michael  Character-Jack  Character-Rowena  Spell/Curse  Powers!Sam  Character-Meg  5000+  archiveofourown  Angst  Short  Possessed!Dean  Demon  Hell  Fix-It-Fic  top!Sam  Bottom!Sam  1412  Dream!Walking  Bar  Hurt/Sick!Boys  hurt!Dean  hurt!Sam 
20 days ago by chellexxx
An Offer of Services
The Feds are always trying to catch the Winchesters (when they know they're alive, at least). When the Counter-Terrorist Unit finally catches Dean, Red takes an interest in meeting new people. Spoiler Warnings up to end of season 12!
SPN  SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Crossover  TV!Show-The!Blacklist  Deal  Character-Crowley  10000+  Short  Season!12  1223  Dean!centric  Hell  Character-Castiel 
june 2017 by chellexxx
Going It Alone
After three months of searching for a demon to deal with, Sam finds one that says yes. Dean is saved. This is the story of Dean fighting to define a life without his brother.

Ten months ago, Sam was dragged into Hell in order to save his brother. Now Sam is back and he and Dean have to find a way to struggle on with their shared burdens, fighting in a world that is careening towards its end.
SPN  SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!3  AU!Season!3  Dean!centric  Separated!Boys  Alone/Separated  Epic  Deal  Hell  150000+  hurt!Sam  hurt!Dean  Angst  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Emotionally!hurt!Dean  PTSD 
april 2017 by chellexxx
Bring Me Back To You
The Wall of Sam fell, and Sam survived. But his grasp of reality doesn’t take much to shatter. A/U in the sense that the Wall fell on its own and Cas wasn’t working with Crowley.
SPN  SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!6  Angst  Character-Castiel  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Memories/Flashback  Hell  Dream/Nightmare  Hurt/Sick!Boys  hurt!Sam  1000+  Short  livejournal 
april 2017 by chellexxx
Blast Into The Past
The Cage was never meant to hold a human. It was meant for one archangel, not two, and definitely not a human soul. Little by little Sam's soul was being destroyed by the torture the Cage inflicted on it. Lucifer and Michael joined together and, with their combined grace, pieced together Sam Winchester's soul and sent him out of the Cage and into the past in the hopes that he can stop this whole thing before it even starts.

Only, when Sam lands, things don't quite go so well. He's not all that sure that this isn't another torture the Cage has provided for him. He's in the past, right after Dean got out of Hell, and he's nowhere near the same man he was before. He can barely remember how to function as a human. It's going to take his family and a little help from a surprised archangel for Sam to start to recover. He doesn't have much time, though, because the apocalypse is still coming and the angels are fighting to get Lucifer free. Can one broken man manage to change the past? Or are they doomed to repeat their same mistakes over and over again?

SPN!Non-AU  Slow!Burn  AU!Season!4  Season!4  Angst  Sam/Gabriel  First!Time  Time!Travel  Time!Travelling!Sam  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Castiel  Character-Gabriel/The!Tickster  Character-Lucifer  Character-Michael  Character-Uriel  Angel  Bonding  PTSD  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Season!6  AU!Season!6  archiveofourown  Long  50000+  Dream/Nightmare  Hell  Memories/Flashback 
march 2017 by chellexxx
“Sam?” Dean reaches out toward him without thinking. Sam reacts
to his touch like it burns, eyes wide and unfocused as his hands lash
out; under his breath, barely audible, Dean hears Sam whispering no; no,
please. Something cold twists in his gut as he retreats, pressing
himself against the other side of the stairwell and raising his hands in
surrender. “Sam, it's me,” he says. “It's Dean.” But Sam doesn't hear
him. He's muttering and still holding his hands up, and Dean sees a
trickle of blood slide down from his hairline before following the
contours of his face into the dip under his eye and then down his nose.
Sam knocks himself off the step and fumbles down two more before Dean
finally hears him breathe. .... 3,139
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!11  1114  hurt!Sam  PTSD  Angst  Memories/Flashback  Hell  Brain/Head!injury  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Self!Harm  1000+  Short  archiveofourown  Domestic!fic  Bat!Cave  Bed!Sharing  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
february 2016 by chellexxx
Raising Hell
Dean takes care of his hurting little brother in the aftermath
of the cage fight with Lucifer. Hurt!Sam, Protective!Dean. .. 2,618
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!11  1110  Missing!Scene  Bat!Cave  hurt!Sam  hurt!Dean  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Angst  Bed!Sharing  Memories/Flashback  Hell  PTSD  1000+  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
january 2016 by chellexxx
Memories of Hell
The Devil in the Details. Just another night in the bunker, you
know, Sam and Dean, talking about their feelings and memories of Hell.
.... 1,618
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!11  1110  Missing!Scene  Memories/Flashback  sick!Dean  Hell  Bat!Cave  1000+  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
january 2016 by chellexxx
Sam opens one eye and clenches it shut again at the light, but
it's enough to see dark brown hair and ice blue eyes. Sam swallows.
"Loud," he rasps. "Bright." ..... "I don't..." Cas pauses for a moment.
"I'm loud?" he asks. .... Sam nods. .... "I am speaking at a very
reasonable volume." Cas sighs, but then lowers his voice to a whisper.
"I can heal you, if you'll allow me to come closer." .... 2,800
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Sam&Castiel  Powers!Sam  Vision  hurt!Sam  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Season!11  1106  Short  archiveofourown  1000+  Bat!Cave  Domestic!fic  Angst  Hell  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Castiel  Character-Lucifer 
november 2015 by chellexxx
He beat himself against the walls of the cage, his howls
ringing across the void of hell. Lucifer knows he must help fight
against the Darkness, but the cage provides limited options. .......
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!11  1104  Missing!Scene  Hell  Outsider!POV  pining!OC  Dream/Nightmare  1000+  Short  SPN  Character-Lucifer 
november 2015 by chellexxx
Won't Get Fooled Again
picking up after "No Rest For The Wicked." When a creature
claiming to be an angel comes upon Sam and Ruby in a motel room claiming
he can help Sam train to rescue Dean from Hell, Sam agrees to work with
the mysterious Castiel. It doesn't hurt that the handsome stranger
tells him that his abilities don't damn him and makes him believe that
he might be worthy of affection. When Dean is safely alive again,
however, things change. Castiel's orders require him to sever ties,
leaving Sam adrift as the road to the Apocalypse appears before them.
What will Sam do when he begins to realize that angels are not what he
believed? ... 52,732
SPN!Non-AU  Slash  Sam/Castiel  First!Time  1st!meeting  Season!4  AU!Season!4  Big!Bang  post!Season!3  Powers!Sam  Long  50000+  archiveofourown  Angst  top!Sam  Hell  Secret  kick!ass!Sam  hurt!Dean  hurt!Sam  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Demon  Hell!Hounds  Separated!Boys  Alone/Separated  Hospitalized!Boys  Bottom!Sam  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  It's!The!Great!Pumpkin!Sam!Winchester  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Chuck!Shurley  Character-Castiel  Character-Anna!Milton  Character-Hannah  Character-Ruby  Character-Meg  Character-Lillith  Character-Bela!Talbot 
october 2015 by chellexxx
Castiel sacrifices more than his freedom when he goes to save
Sam from the cage, but he gains so much more in return. Now linked with
Sam in a way no angel and human have been before, they struggle to pick
up the threads of their old lives. S6 AU. Sastiel friendship/pre-slash
.... 84,079
SPN!Non-AU  Slash  post!Season!5  Pre-Slash  Sam/Castiel  First!Time  Bonding  Season!6  AU!Season!6  75000+  Epic  Hell  Angst  Torture  hurt!Sam  hurt!OC  hurt!Castiel  Angel  Separated!Boys  Alone/Separated  asshole!Dean  Solo!Hunt  Diner/Restaurant  Prison/Jail  Panic!Room  Resouled  Powerless!Castiel  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  A!Break!From!Hunting  Character-Death  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Adam!Milligan  Character-Crowley  Character-Lucifer  Character-Rufus!Turner  Character-Jody!Mills  Character-Raphael  Character-Michael 
september 2015 by chellexxx
Fear of Falling
Cage!fic. Post-Swan Song. Stuck in possibly the worst place in
creation with only a bitter and angry Michael still wearing Adam for
company, Sam decides sticking with Lucifer is better than nothing. But
with the memory of being Lucifer's vessel fresh in mind, Sam can't help
but contemplate over a few things he learnt while able to see inside the
devil's head. As a gradual sense of companionship builds between them,
Sam finds that maybe being with Lucifer is more of a comfortable
position than he thought. .... Eventual Samifer. ...... 39,255
SPN!Non-AU  Slash  post!Season!5  Sam/Lucifer  First!Time  Angst  Hell  Slow!Burn  25000+  Long  archiveofourown  Torture  hurt!Sam  Memories/Flashback  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Adam!Milligan  Character-Michael 
september 2015 by chellexxx
This is a story about Sam, who has never hunted a damn thing in
his life and about Dean, who has hunted every damn thing there is. They
will meet at the vastnesses of blooming farmlands on a country road on a
sunny spring day. It's this car, which Sam finds in the Men of Letter's
bunker, that sends him that way. A car - so black and beautiful - that
was buried in the Bunker for decades. And you know, it's not just a car.
Because legend has it that it belonged to the best hunter, who has ever
lived. He was the best, the most dangerous. But it's rumored that at
the end he became more monster than man. Just like the things he always
hunted. So this is a story about the Impala, about the curse of Cain and
the blessing of the Samulet. A story about hellhounds and the darkness
at crossroads. About Death and Hell. Then of course there will be Hell,
because Dean's the new King. . 58,296
Slash  Sam/Dean  Big!Bang  Season!1  AU!Season!10  Season!10  AU!Season!1  Stanford  Pre-Series  AU!Pre-Series  SPN!AU  Demon!Dean  Deal  Self!Harm  Domestic!fic  Tattoo  Bat!Cave  Time!Travel  archiveofourown  50000+  Long  Amulet  Hell!Hounds  Hell  Hunter!Dean  AU!Stanford  SPN  Time!Travelling!Sam  Character-John!Winchester  Character-Mary!Winchester  Character-Impala 
september 2015 by chellexxx
Of Men and of Rockets
Sam's always thought it's this fiction-thing, biting your lip
until it bleeds. It seems dramatic and all, but short of tearing off too
much dry skin or having really dry lips to start with, it takes more
pressure than most people are willing to exert, really, to break the
skin of the lip and make it actually bleed. The pain of broken skin is
absolutely nothing, though, to the feeling of Lucifer's hands rooting
around in his innards (with that sort of gleeful detachment that the
fallen archangel must have spent millennia cultivating) and tearing out
whatever displeases him. In other words... Sam wakes up from a Cage
trauma-fueled nightmare and can't shake the dream. Dean helps by turning
on the heater in high summer and sweating through it. In the end,
there's nothing like a bit of blasphemy to shake the cold in his bones.
.... 1,677
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!7  Angst  PTSD  Dream/Nightmare  Torture  Memories/Flashback  Hell  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  1000+  Short  archiveofourown  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
june 2015 by chellexxx
My Hellhound
Hot breath blew the hair up off his neck. Hellhound. Out of
everything in the pit, he hated them the most. Hurt!Sam
Heroic!Protective!Dean to the Rescue. ... 18,912
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  post!Season!5  Hell  hurt!Sam  pining!OC  Demon  Angel  Spell/Curse  Hell!Hounds  15000+  Long  pdf/mobi  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Castiel  Character-Lucifer 
january 2015 by chellexxx
Aftermath 'verse
It took Sam four months to get Dean out of Hell. Four months in
which the world was black and white – on mute. Four months, six days,
and seventeen hours and Sam felt like he might sleep for a year, after.
Dean slept for three days. .. 11,371
SPN!Non-AU  Slash  Gen  post!Season!3  Hell  Sam/Dean  First!Time  PTSD  Emotionally!hurt  Memories/Flashback  Emotionally!hurt!Dean  Angst  10000+  archiveofourown  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
december 2014 by chellexxx
The Other Shoe
In which Sam states little but implies a lot, and Dean fills in
the blanks. Early season seven, rated for non-explicit references to
rape. ... 1,109
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  Season!7  Angst  Non-Con  Memories/Flashback  PTSD  Hell  hurt!Sam  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Short  1000+  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
december 2014 by chellexxx
To The Waters And The Wild
This is a very AU version of events after Dean goes to hell--in this version Sam saves him--maybe. ... 60,342
SPN!Non-AU  Slash  Sam/Dean  Season!4  AU!Season!3  AU!Season!4  Season!3  316  Hell  archiveofourown  livejournal  50000+  Long  SPN 
september 2014 by chellexxx
A Case of Do or Die
A man falls out of John's closet in April of 1987 and sends him
on a quest to close the gates of Hell. Yet somehow, in the process of
losing his life to save his sons, he finds a life he never thought he'd
have. And there may be more than one closet full of secrets waiting for
him further down the road--in fact, there may be a whole bunker full of
them. .... 33,568
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  AU!Pre-Series  Season!8  AU!Season!8  Pre-Series  Weechesters  Time!Travel  Spell/Curse  Hell  pdf/mobi  25000+  Long  SPN  Time!Travelling!OC  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Gabriel/The!Tickster  Character-John!Winchester  Character-Henry!Winchester  Character-Crowley  Character-Pastor!Jim  Character-Meg  Character-Mary!Winchester  Character-Missouri!Moseley  Character-Yellow!Eyed!Demon  livejournal 
august 2014 by chellexxx
A View from the Cage
Two brothers fell into a hole, but only one was rescued. Set
after Season 5. Spoilers up through 6.11 Appointment in Samarra .....
SPN!Non-AU  Gen  post!Season!5  Season!6  611  Outsider!POV  hurt!Sam  Torture  Hell  hurt!OC  609  Angst  1000+  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Death  Character-Adam!Milligan  Character-Crowley  Character-Lucifer  Character-Michael 
may 2014 by chellexxx
Broken Mirrors
Gabriel has been stuck in that DVD the whole time and it isn’t
until Sam watches through to the end that he escapes. Only by then Sam
is all alone, with Dean and Cas fallen victim to exploding Dick, He
breaks down. Gabriel knows about loss, and knows that being alone is one
of the worst things in the world when you really need a shoulder to cry
on. Healing is rarely easy and never fast. ... 111,369
SPN!Non-AU  Slash  Sam/Gabriel  First!Time  Big!Bang  post!Season!7  archiveofourown  top!Sam  Separated!Boys  Bonding  Dream/Nightmare  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Vision  Convention  Spell/Curse  Bottom!Sam  Epic  Dean/Castiel  519  sick!OC  pining!Gabriel  SPN  Gabriel!Lives  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Charlie!Bradbury  Character-Castiel  Character-Gabriel/The!Tickster  Character-Henry!Winchester  Character-Garth!Fitzgerald!IV  Character-Jody!Mills  Character-Kevin!Tran  Character-Abaddon  100000+  Purgatory  Character-Impala  Character-Bobby!Singer  Powers!Sam  Hell  Angst  Winchester!Gospels 
april 2014 by chellexxx
A Star That Lights The Road
Dean thinks he finally knows the angel's plans for him. To be
their foot soldier in a war that can't possibly be won. And when he
can't do it? Well, there's every chance he'll be thrown back downstairs.
Sam already lost his brother once, and he won't let it happen again.
Domestic!fic  Angst  top!Sam  archiveofourown  livejournal  Short  10000+  First!Time  Memories/Flashback  Hell  Curtain!fic  hurt!Dean  PTSD  Season!4  Sam/Dean  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
march 2014 by chellexxx
Nothing to Kill or Die For
Sam is back from Hell and is one giant mess of sensory issues
and hallucinations. The common cold is just not something he can easily
deal with. Dean tries his best to help, because it’s Sam.
Rating: PG (couple of swear words, post-Hell-trauma Sam, gratuitous
5000+  Short  livejournal  sick!Sam  Hell  PTSD  hurt!Sam  post!Season!5  Gen  SPN!Non-AU  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
march 2014 by chellexxx
A Scorpion In the Fire
Dean relives his memories of Hell when he's captured by a group
of angels who aren't only seeking revenge against him, but are using
the live video feed of his torture to try to force Sam to hand over
Castiel. Sam, Castiel, Charlie and Kevin fight the clock, and Dean's own
self-destructive tendencies, to rescue Dean and put him back together.
archiveofourown  livejournal  Long  25000+  Torture  Angel  Hell  Memories/Flashback  Non-Con  hurt!Dean  Abducted!Dean  Abducted  Season!9  Gen  SPN!Non-AU  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Charlie!Bradbury  Character-Castiel  Character-Crowley  Character-Kevin!Tran 
january 2014 by chellexxx
Sharing and Kevin
Don't poke the mutilated soul with a stick, Kevin.

Someone asks Sam to share details about his time in the Cage. For once
he actually opens up a little. Set sometime between "Clip Show" and
Hell  Confession  Sad  Memories/Flashback  Angst  822  Season!8  archiveofourown  Short  1000+  Gen  SPN!Non-AU  SPN  Character-Kevin!Tran 
january 2014 by chellexxx
The Holy Trinity (OCD Sam)
Sam/Dean or gen; Sam is compensating for having Lucifer in his
head by going into hyperfunctional mode. I want to see touches of
Mystery Spot OCD Sam: hospital corners, perfect efficiency, everything
under control, everything in place. It works. He still hallucinates, but
he can keep going through it, he can wall himself off from being
affected by fear of his breaks with reality and by the trauma of the
things he remembers and hallucinates. He just has to keep going further
and further into his coping mechanism, because if it breaks it will all
come crashing down and that will not be good
hurt!Dean  sick!Sam  Abducted  hurt!Sam  Sam/Dean  Angst  Hell  Memories/Flashback  PTSD  Emotionally!hurt  Season!7  10000+  livejournal  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Short  Abducted!Sam  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Emotionally!hurt!Dean  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Crowley  archiveofourown 
october 2013 by chellexxx
The Characters Upon the Rock
Sam may not see Lucifer anymore, but that doesn't mean he's
anywhere near okay. The guys have to retire from the hunting life, but
civilian life is not what Hallmark Cards promised either...
guilty!Sam  Domestic!fic  Hell  Memories/Flashback  Angst  5000+  Curtain!fic  Season!7  Gen  SPN!Non-AU  Short  SPN  archiveofourown 
september 2013 by chellexxx
Safe Harbor
Post Season 7 Finale. In this AU, Dick is dead and Sam, Dean,
and Castiel escape the explosion intact if a little worse for the wear.
With no immediate danger on the horizon for the first time in a long
time, the boys decide to take a breather for a while for some much
needed rest and recuperation. They take Cas with them and relocate to a
little bungalow by the beach. As they settle into their new life on
hiatus from hunting, Sam reveals some long-held feelings which trigger
painful memories for Dean of his time in Hell with Alastair. Now the
dark secret that Dean’s been hiding is threatening to tear him and Sam
apart for good. .................. 31,748
25000+  Confession  livejournal  Big!Bang  top!Sam  First!Time  Curtain!fic  post!Season!7  Sam/Dean  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Domestic!fic  Long  Angst  Dream/Nightmare  Memories/Flashback  Hell  Non-Con  guilty!Dean  pining!Dean  Deal  Torture  hurt!Dean  pining!Sam  archiveofourown  Powerless!Castiel  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Castiel 
august 2013 by chellexxx
I Can’t See You, But I’ll Save You
Dean and Sam are trapped in a cave in the dark. Flashbacks of the Pit and a dying cell battery. Set after S6 1,587
livejournal  hurt!Sam  Trapped  Emotionally!hurt  Angst  Gen  Memories/Flashback  Hell  SPN!Non-AU  1000+  PTSD  Short  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer 
july 2013 by chellexxx
His Heart left the World
Dean would do anything for his brother. When Sam jumps into the
cage to save the world Dean keeps his promise and goes to Lisa and Ben.
But months later a visit to Sam's grave reveals that his brother has
somehow been freed from hell. Dean won't leave his brother alone to deal
with the aftermath. But what has been saved from the cage is nothing
like his brother, and Dean has to try to teach Sam how to be human
again. 32,000
Big!Bang  Bottom!Sam  Possessive!Sam  Bonding  Amulet  Previous!Relationship  First!Time  SPN!Non-AU  25000+  Angel  Angst  post!Season!5  livejournal  Slash  Established!Relationship  Sam/Dean  hurt!Sam  Long  Dean/Lisa  Resouled  Hell  Season!6  AU!Season!6  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Castiel  Character-Balthazar  Character-Lisa!Braeden 
april 2013 by chellexxx
Just This Side of Hell
Sam rescues Dean from hell, which has repercussions,
(surprise!) Things get tricky because they're Winchesters, so there's
guilt and pain and of course physical trauma because, you know, hell.
Come along for the ride, might be fun... oh, and Bobby, there's a whole
bunch of Bobby, which is right up there with pie. 36,000
livejournal  Hell  35000+  Sam/Dean  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Long  First!Time  AU!Season!3  kick!ass!Sam  Angst  Deal  hurt!Dean  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer 
september 2012 by chellexxx
Hells Angels
Sam screamed, turning to fold Adam into his own body, offering
what little protection he could as the thrust of pain speared his back.
pdf/mobi  Powers!Sam  Hell!Hounds  post!Season!5  Angst  Hell  Gen  SPN!Non-AU  20000+  Long  AU!Season!5  hurt!Sam  Dean/Lisa  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Adam!Milligan  Character-Lucifer  Character-Lisa!Braeden  Character-Michael 
april 2012 by chellexxx
Back from the Cage
Sam read a scientific study once, about how the act of smiling
could elevate your mood, even if you had no reason to be happy. So Dean
says, "C'mon, bitch," and Sam smiles, hoping that if he does, he'll feel
the old warmth the term of endearment used to bring. And when Dean
jokes, "That's my brother, he's a little slow," to their witness, Sam
smiles, even though all he can think about is the truth behind the joke.
He was slow enough to let himself be tricked into letting the devil
loose. .... 2,363
Memories/Flashback  Emotionally!hurt  post!Season!5  1000+  Gen  livejournal  SPN!Non-AU  hurt!Sam  Short  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  PTSD  Angst  Hell  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
march 2012 by chellexxx
Sam's method of grounding himself and keeping reality straight
is pain. Problem is, his hand has healed. So he's got to get creative. I
don't necessarily mean serious self-harm, just little things. But then
other people (hotel clerks, waitresses, etc) start noticing the creepy
tall guy who zones out, occasionally talks to air, and randomly pinches
or slaps himself. I don't imagine Dean would take to kindly to people
using words like 'freak' or 'psycho' behind Sam's back. Bonus points if
one day he snaps and tell them exactly the kind of monumental sacrifice
Sam made for the world that left him this way, even if it means they
think Dean is crazy too. 1,126
Hell  Memories/Flashback  PTSD  Diner/Restaurant  1000+  Outsider!POV  Season!7  Gen  livejournal  SPN!Non-AU  Short  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Angst  Self!Harm  SPN 
march 2012 by chellexxx
Sam finds a way to keep Dean from going to hell: he'll go in
his brother's place. He knows it's going to be bad and that he'll emerge
changed. He never knew how much.
Hell  First!Time  Angst  Deal  Season!3  Demon  Length!Unknown  livejournal  Sam/Dean  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  AU!Season!3  Separated!Boys  SPN 
march 2012 by chellexxx
Ten in One
A hiker's body is found mauled in the Oregon woods. While
investigating, Sam and Dean stumble onto an itinerant sideshow, whose
members are the primary target of the same creature killing across the
American west. The case alone would be difficult enough, even if Sam and
Dean didn't have to deal with the strained consequences of a trip to
Hell and back. 36,000
Demon  archiveofourown  Season!4  hurt!Dean  Hell  316  PTSD  Big!Bang  Case!fic  Gen  SPN!Non-AU  35000+  livejournal  Long  Season!3  AU!Season!4  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Ellen!Harvelle 
february 2012 by chellexxx
Those who appear smaller from a distance
Sam goes to hell so Dean doesn't have to, but there is no
fucking way Dean Winchester is going to let the little shit brood in
hell for all eternity, and leave him all by himself topside. He goes
through hell (literally) to pull him out, with the aid of his dad, Bobby
and his rugged good looks.
Sam is Eurydice or maybe Persephone (see? totally the girl) and Dean is
Orpheus (except not a dick) or maybe Dante, or maybe he's just plain
First!Time  Angst  Hell  kick!ass!Dean  20000+  Big!Bang  Season!3  Deal  livejournal  Sam/Dean  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Long  AU!Season!3  SPN  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-John!Winchester 
february 2012 by chellexxx
You Take It With You
Sam saves the world, and he brings Dean back from a month in
Hell, but that's when things start to get complicated. Dean's cheated
death before, but this time, it's different – Dean's spirit is unable to
re-enter his body. Can Sam and Bobby work out how to reunite Dean's
body and spirit? And how will Dean cope if they can't? From hunts in the
Chicago lakes to visits to the Grand Canyon, with dreams, handjobs and
hookers along the way, Sam and Dean ride it out and learn all over again
how to live this life and live it together.
Powers!Sam  Het  Sam/OFC  Ghost  Schmoop  Romance  Angst  hurt!Dean  top!Sam  Big!Bang  Dream/Nightmare  Grand!Canyon  Resouled  Case!fic  Season!3  316  PTSD  Hell  25000+  livejournal  Sam/Dean  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Long  Vacation  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer  archiveofourown 
february 2012 by chellexxx
Between Asleep and Awake
Back in his own head with Lucifer riding shotgun, Sam doesnt
always know whats real and what isnt. Even when him and Dean are
intimate. He tries really hard, though.
Sam/Dean  Established!Relationship  Season!7  702  Hell  Memories/Flashback  Non-Con  1000+  livejournal  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  PTSD  Short  SPN  Character-Lucifer 
november 2011 by chellexxx
Hell Is Weird
Sam's thoughts as he falls toward the cage. Dean and Sam talk about what happened.
Gen  post!Season!5  Hell  fics!by!clair!beaubien  5000+  SPN!Non-AU  Short  SPN  Character-Castiel  Character-Lucifer 
november 2011 by chellexxx
you'll get yours and I'll get mine
It's a long road home, but for Sam, there's only one destination that matters.
Powers!Sam  Angel  Gen  post!Season!5  Hell  5000+  livejournal  SPN!Non-AU  Short  Separated!Boys  SPN 
october 2011 by chellexxx
Family Games
There are only so many ways for Micheal to entertain himself in the cage.
Gen  post!Season!5  Hell  Torture  Non-Con  1000+  livejournal  SPN!Non-AU  hurt!Sam  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Michael 
october 2011 by chellexxx
Like Dust in Heaven
Sam has his soul back. It is tattered and fried and frayed to
the raw nerve. Dean wants to help but for some reason, the only one Sam
will turn to is Castiel. ...... 4,500
Sam/Castiel  First!Time  Season!6  611  1000+  Memories/Flashback  Hell  livejournal  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  hurt!Sam  PTSD  Short  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Castiel  Character-Lucifer 
october 2011 by chellexxx
Call Your Name
"Sam has been held captive and abused by a serial killer, who
called him Sammy all the time. When it's over he can't stand being
called that anymore because in his mind the name at once connects with
the traumatic memories. But Dean will be damned if he'll let some
asshole who tortured his brother take that name away from them!"
If Lucifer thought he could take something as innocent as a childhood
nickname and twist it into something sick and torturous, he had another
thing coming. He'd had already taken everything else from them and
tainted it. He couldn't have "Sammy" too.
PTSD  Gen  Torture  Hell  622  Season!6  5000+  SPN!Non-AU  hurt!Sam  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Lucifer 
october 2011 by chellexxx
My Spencer
Takes place immediately after the incident with Tobias Henkle
for Spencer, and during Dean's time in hell for Sam. Then after Dean
comes back it's time for Sam to introduce him to Spencer
Season!4  Established!Relationship  Romance  Crossover  aww  1000+  Season!3  Hell  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Schmoop  Short  AU!Season!3  Separated!Boys  Sam/Spencer!Reid  Local!LEOS/FBI  SPN  TV!Show-Criminal!Minds 
october 2011 by chellexxx
If I Have Freedom
Sam's not been scratching the wall. Dean's been the Awesome Big
Brother. But when the good guys need information, Sam will have to put
his sanity on the line. In the aftermath, Dean will have to be the big
brother in more ways than one. Spoilers to 6.11. 41,502
PTSD  Gen  Season!6  611  Regression/De-Aged  35000+  SPN!Non-AU  hurt!Sam  Long  Regressed/De-Aged!Sam  Hell  Angst  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Castiel  Character-Gabriel/The!Tickster  Character-Samuel!Campbell 
september 2011 by chellexxx
Bleed as it Grows
After Hell, Sam can't bring himself to hold a razor to his face. So he lets his hair grow.
Gen  post!Season!6  Hell  1000+  livejournal  SPN!Non-AU  Short  SPN 
september 2011 by chellexxx
Johnny Angel
Sam's catatonic, Dean is missing his brother. Can anything
bring the two of them back together again? Hurt Sam, Angsty Dean, Uber
Hunter Bobby, Supportive Castiel
pdf/mobi  Gen  post!Season!5  Coma  Memories/Flashback  Hell  50000+  SPN!Non-AU  hurt!Sam  PTSD  Long  Hospital  Hospitalized!Boys  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer  Character-Castiel 
august 2011 by chellexxx
And In My Soul, An Icy Dread Remains
Sam gets himself locked in a freezer. The memories of Hell's
frozen lake. Lucifer's icy touch, all those fun things, are banging on
the wall and Sam? Sam's not coping too well.
Dean is inside with him, frantically calling for Castiel or Balthy or
anyone who has their angel ears on and he's in full-blown protective big
brother mode.
Gen  Season!6  Trapped  Memories/Flashback  Hell  1000+  livejournal  SPN!Non-AU  hurt!Sam  PTSD  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Castiel 
august 2011 by chellexxx
Defect & sequel - Hell and back
Dean is finally captured by the FBI just as his time runs out.
39,686 Dean's having a little trouble adjusting after his return. Sam's
going to help if it kills them both. sequel 42,006 Gideon and Morgan
join Sam and Dean on the hunt for the firestarter, but the boys are
injured, and Deans not quite over Hell. 16,384
pdf/mobi  Dean!centric  75000+  Gen  Season!3  Crossover  hurt!Dean  kick!ass!Sam  Hell  SPN!Non-AU  Caught  Epic  GSW  AU!Season!3  Local!LEOS/FBI  Depraved!Humans  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  TV!Show-Criminal!Minds  Deleted!Fic!or!Author  Character-Ellen!Harvelle  Character-Victor!Henricksen 
july 2011 by chellexxx
Dismantle Repair
Den gets back to the present terrified of what he'll find and
it's worse than he imagined, when Sam died, again, he went to Hell. dean
cleans Sam up and Sam aologises for sending Dean to Hell.
guilty!Dean  Angst  sick!Sam  Panic!Room  Missing!Scene  Gen  513  514  Hell  Season!5  5000+  SPN!Non-AU  Short  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys 
july 2011 by chellexxx
Slow Day In Hell
Three demons discuss how hot the Winchesters are.
Season!2  Gen  Hell  1000+  livejournal  SPN!Non-AU  Outsider!POV  Short  SPN 
july 2011 by chellexxx
Nothing Left
Dean has one last question to ask. Set in the garden.. 2,286
Gen  504  Season!5  1000+  SPN!Non-AU  Short  Bar  Hell  Memories/Flashback  Angst  asshole!Dean  SPN  Character-Castiel 
july 2011 by chellexxx
Fake reality - sequel - Always Going to Save You
Gabriel s biggest trick was faking his death to his own brother
Lucifer. But now he's the only one that can save Sam from the fate that
he sealed for himself.
Sam/Gabriel  Established!Relationship  post!Season!5  Hell  OMC  OFC  20000+  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Long  SPN  Gabriel!Lives  Character-Gabriel/The!Tickster  Character-Andy!Gallagher  Character-Ava!Wilson  Character-Castiel  Character-Ansem 
july 2011 by chellexxx
If Wishes Were Winchesters
Dean gazed momentarily at the empty passenger seat, seeing the
darkness, the stillness, listening to profound silence -- how could the
sound of nothing sound so damn-awful loud? The rumble of the Impala cut
through the silence, like the first cup of morning coffee cutting
through a bad hangover. Fighting the urge to slam a fist through the
windshield, Dean opted to turn on the radio.
Gen  503  Hell  Season!5  1000+  SPN!Non-AU  Text/Email/Internet  Short  AU!Season!5  SPN 
july 2011 by chellexxx
Dean makes a mistake - one which costs him everything. Hurt,
angry and confused, not knowing how to look out for Sammy, he makes a
deal with a demon, trading 'anything' to get his father back. Only he
doesn't quite know what he's just given away. 8,459
Jealous!Dean  pining!Dean  Sam/Dean  Season!4  First!Time  Sam/Castiel  Deal  hurt!sam  Abducted  Non-Con  Torture  Hell  guilty!Dean  fics!by!freakn-out  5000+  Bottom!Sam  Insecurity  livejournal  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  asshole!Dean  Short  Abusive!Dean  Emotionally!hurt  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  Angst  Season!Undefined  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Castiel  Character-John!Winchester 
july 2011 by chellexxx
I Knew It Wasn't Dean
Sam learned in hell how to tell not-Dean from real-Dean. Rated for references to torture and other nasty things.
Gen  611  Hell  Memories/Flashback  Season!6  1000+  SPN!Non-AU  PTSD  asshole!Dean  Short  SPN 
july 2011 by chellexxx
Under Sufferance
Besides other things, Lucifer touch-starves Sam in Hell as
punishment (Sam did fall in the Pit with his entire body and all...).
Once out, Sam cannot bring himself to ask Dean despite how badly he
needs it. Dean needs to realize what Sam's problem is, and how to get
himself to help, since constant touching doesn't exactly come naturally
to him.
post!Season!5  Romance  Bed!Sharing  Schmoop  Angst  Hell  Memories/Flashback  PTSD  First!Time  Season!6  Sam/Dean  SPN!Non-AU  Slash  livejournal  1000+  Short  SPN 
july 2011 by chellexxx
The voice on the breeze
Sam is back, but broken. Dean does his best to hold him together, that is - until Dean breaks. ..... 1,511
sick!Dean  post!Season!5  Gen  1000+  SPN!Non-AU  Short  Angst  Emotionally!hurt  Memories/Flashback  Emotionally!hurt!Sam  PTSD  Hell  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Bobby!Singer 
july 2011 by chellexxx
Ive Got Your Back
Sam and Dean get locked in a very small, dark room, and Sam panics thinking hes back in the cage. Dean calms him down.
Trapped  Bottom!Sam  livejournal  PTSD  Hell  Memories/Flashback  606  Season!6  Sam/Dean  SPN!Non-AU  Slash  5000+  Established!Relationship  Short  SPN 
july 2011 by chellexxx
And When Thy Heart Began To Beat
For six months Dean has tried to live a 'normal' life, a life
he was never really destined to live. This is never more evident than
when he starts receiving cryptic messages from the kids he encounters.
Could these messages be the pieces to a puzzle that will bring his
brother back?
Dream/Nightmare  Previous!Relationship  Non-Con  Torture  Hell  hurt!sam  First!Time  Sam/Dean  post!Season!5  Amulet  20000+  Slash  SPN!Non-AU  Long  SPN  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Character-Lucifer  Character-Ruby  Character-Michael  Character-Bobby!Singer  Angst  Memories/Flashback  Character-Lisa!Braeden  Character-Ben!Braeden  Dean/Lisa 
june 2011 by chellexxx
Full Circle
Dean's POV - After weeks back on the road together, things still aren't quite the same. Sam's not Sammy anymore.
Powers!Sam  Angst  Hell  Memories/Flashback  Deal  Demon  Gen  post!Season!5  Amulet  Werewolf  guilty!Sam  guilty!Dean  Abducted  hurt!sam  Torture  35000+  SPN!Non-AU  PTSD  Long  Abducted!Sam  SPN  Gabriel!Lives  Hurt/Sick!Boys  Fix-It-Fic  Character-Castiel  Character-Gabriel/The!Tickster  GSW  Hospitalized!Boys  hurt!Dean 
may 2011 by chellexxx
Takes place in season 4 after 'Yellow Fever.' Dean relents to
find comfort from memories of hell.. 1,328 sequel
Slash  SPN!Non-AU  First!Time  Sam/Dean  Season!4  Memories/Flashback  Hell  1000+  Short  SPN 
january 2011 by chellexxx
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