asterisk2a + lifelessons   42

Malcolm Gladwell Interview on Genius, Late Bloomers, Criminal Profiling, Intelligence Failure (2009) - YouTube
min10 Networking & making Conversation, "Everyone is interesting. Let them talk abt what they know well & do well. If not u may make them uncomfortable - ur fault. Just ask them the right inquisitive questions." // Career & Life Advice. Stay Humble (humility) & Smart. Overconfidence is the disease of the expert. Titans of Wall Street believed in such command that they were risk averse & believed never 2 fail (black swan, blind spot). Overconfidence & arrogance is a psychological problem of success. // Also, learning from experience, the elders, is so important ie 2015, Unicorns in Silicon Valley with burn rates greater than during the dot. com bubble & the youngsters do not listen 2 have plan b & c in their desk drawer as Bill Gurly mentioned in his 2015 SXSW talk w Gladwell. bc "U only learn certain things when youve been humbled." // 23:35 its not about IQ (intelligence), its abt environment & culture! Nature vs Nurture (Peers Cohort). + Innovation by Late Bloomers + Taleb
Networking  socialising  life  lesson  life  hacker  introvert  extrovert  Career  Politicians  Policy  Makers  advice  ladder  GFC  Success  education  environment  living  environment  culture  society  Gini  coefficient  American  Dream  income  mobility  social  mobility  peers  childhood  childhood  development  parenthood  parenting  parents  helicopter  parent  lifehacker  lifehacks  lifelessons  lifelesson  Nassim  Taleb 
april 2015 by asterisk2a
Ballet star Tamara Rojo says modern children lack discipline - BBC News
The principal dancer at the English National Ballet says many of today's pupils lack the discipline to succeed. Tamara Rojo told Radio Times magazine that children were often praised for quick results rather than hard work. "We live in a society that rewards fast success based on little talent or commitment, which is transient and a dangerous place to be," she said. "Do we want to promote instant success and instant failure, or do we want to promote self-esteem and hard work?"
growth  mindset  helicopter  parent  parenthood  parenting  parents  Success  failure  discipline  education  policy  teaching  life  hacker  life  lesson  lifehacks  lifehacker  lifelessons  lifelesson  Millennials  generationy  childhood  childhood  development  perseverance 
april 2015 by asterisk2a
Debatte über Germanwings-Absturz: Dem Chaos eine Chance - SPIEGEL ONLINE
Ein ebenso großes Tabu wie das Versagen deutscher Technik ist das Versagen des deutschen Gemüts. Psychische Erkrankungen wie Depressionen oder bipolare Störungen, unter denen offenbar Andreas Lubitz litt, gelten in unserer auf volle Funktionalität geeichten deutschen Gesellschaft als unerträglich. Mögen Zeitschriften und TV-Magazine in letzter Zeit noch so empathisch über Phänomene wie Burn-out berichten - die Realität fällt hinter diesen Erkenntnisstand weit zurück. [...] Wer Fehler macht, wer Schwäche zeigt, gilt als stigmatisiert - er wird zum Sonderling. Im Spätkapitalismus hat längst das Individuum selbst diese Konformisierung vom Staat und von den Unternehmen übernommen; wir sind uns selbst unser größter Schinder. [...] Philosoph Michel Foucault nannte diesen Effekt "Selbsttechnologie": Der Einzelne sieht sich selbst in einer Art Bringschuld gegenüber dem System. [...] Heinz Bude - "Gesellschaft der Angst" [...] Heute denkt man: Ich bin, der ich sein könnte"
Germany  culture  public  discourse  history  mental  health  mental  illness  failure  burnout  Philosophy  public  awareness  Capitalism  perfectionism  SMB  SME  sociology  status  anxiety  middle  class  Zivilgesellschaft  gesellschaft  Angst  anxiety  Scheitern  Versagen  Silicon  Valley  USA  American  Dream  Ausweglosigkeit  society  social  cohesion  western  society  social  society  lifehacker  lifehacks  life  hacker  life  lesson  work  life  balance  lifelessons  lifelesson 
april 2015 by asterisk2a
Hätte, hätte, Fahrradkette | Psychologie-heute Blog
Hätte, hätte, Fahrradkette: Unser ehemaliger Chefredakteur Heiko Ernst macht sich in unserem aktuellen Blog Gedanken über sein Leben. Über das gelebte und über das ungelebte. Er kommt zu dem Schluss: "Nicht gelebte Varianten des Lebens gehören zu unserem seelischen Mobiliar, und wie in einen realen Sessel können wir uns auch in eine Lieblingsfantasie fallen lassen ..."
Philosophy  psychology  life  hacker  life  lesson  lifelessons  lifelesson  lifehacks  lifehacker 
april 2015 by asterisk2a
The Science Of Why You Should Spend Your Money On Experiences, Not Things | Co.Exist | ideas impact
"The tendency of keeping up with the Joneses tends to be more pronounced for material goods than for experiential purchases," says Gilovich. "It certainly bothers us if we're on a vacation and see people staying in a better hotel or flying first class. But it doesn't produce as much envy as when we're outgunned on material goods." Gilovich's research has implications for individuals who want to maximize their happiness return on their financial investments, for employers who want to have a happier workforce, and policy-makers who want to have a happy citizenry. "By shifting the investments that societies make and the policies they pursue, they can steer large populations to the kinds of experiential pursuits that promote greater happiness," write Gilovich and his coauthor, Amit Kumar, in their recent article in the academic journal Experimental Social Psychology. [...] but also place an emphasis on employers giving paid vacation and governments taking care of recreational spaces.
Millennials  HR  human  resources  Share  Economy  happiness  index  happiness  experience  shared  experience  life  hacker  lifehacks  lifehacker  Vacation  western  lifestyle  status  anxiety  status  symbol  socioeconomic  status  life  lesson  lifelessons  work  life  balance  lifelesson  quality  of  life 
april 2015 by asterisk2a
Andrew Sullivan on quitting blogging: "It was killing me." - YouTube
digital relationships do not compare to real relationships. & sufficient sleep and meditation and exercise.
Blogging  Twitter  Facebook  Social  Media  lifelessons  lifelesson  lifehacks  life  hacker  lifehacker  life  lesson  meditation  worklife  work  life  balance 
april 2015 by asterisk2a
The problem with opulence: the more you pay for... - Nassim Nicholas Taleb
The problem with opulence: the more you pay for a service (meal, hotel, airplane ticket), the more dissatisfied you will be with the smallest imperfection, the slightest error. Compare constipated old Park Avenue couples riding first class, for whom traveling is some kind of exercise in bitterness, to partying passengers in the back of the plane for whom any beer is "good enough". It is as if life wanted to get even with them. Which leads to the paradox that the only way to properly enjoy wealth is to avoid spending it.
Super  Rich  status  symbol  status  anxiety  Consumerism  zombie  consumer  consumerist  consumer  materialism  opulence  happiness  index  life  lesson  life  hacker  lifelessons  lifelesson  western  lifestyle  lifehacks  lifehacker  sociology  psychology  wealth 
august 2014 by asterisk2a
The Long Game Part 1: Why Leonardo DaVinci was no genius on Vimeo
honing your craft, put the work in, grind it out, ... sort of the 10k hour rule by gladwell - sort of. // Part 2: http://vimeo.com/87448006 // ++ THE GAP by Ira Glass - http://vimeo.com/85040589 - hone your skill your craft by putting stuff out. period. // ++ “The most important possible thing you can do is do a lot of work.” [...] The question of what makes someone successful has occupied some of history’s greatest minds. For Alexander Graham Bell, success was bound to befall the person “who carefully advances step by step, with his mind becoming wider and wider.” [... prolonged exposure ... grit ... personal growth and professional growth mindset ... there is no overnight success. ] http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2014/01/29/ira-glass-success-daniel-sax/
creativity  patience  long-term  thinking  long-term  view  craft  skill  practical  skills  practical  skill  set  skills  history  innovator  innovation  incremental  incrementalism  peak  creator  influencer  influence  Remix  Culture  digital  economy  Age  life  lesson  life  hacker  western  lifestyle  lifelessons  lifelesson  Millennials  generationy  entrepreneurship  entrepreneurial  entrepreneur  beginner  Start-Up  lesson  Start-Up  advice  Ira  Glass  exposure  literature  liberal  arts  ambition  self-belief  self-improvement  self-awareness  self-publishing  self-employment  publishing  2.0  writing  digital  content  content  creator  Mobile  Creative  Mobile  Creatives  value  creation  creating  creation  Creative  Commons  collaboration  Collaborative  mentoring  mentor  internship  on  job  training  Trainee  education  education  policy  critic  critiques  critics  graphic  artist  digital  artist  artists  Signal  vs.  Noise  filter  bubble  content  curation  content  distribution  Personal  Brand  expertise  progress  human  progress  Success  grit  psychology  Personal  Management  growth  professional  growth  profession  professional  growth  mindset  HR  human  resources  overnight  corporate  people  intellectual 
july 2014 by asterisk2a
Joan Didion on Self-Respect | Brain Pickings
Character - the Willingness to accept Responsibility for one's own life - is the source from which self-respect springs. Joan Didion [...] Self-respect is something that our grandparents, whether or not they had it, knew all about. They had instilled in them, young, a certain discipline, the sense that one lives by doing things one does not particularly want to do, by putting fears and doubts to one side, by weighing immediate comforts against the possibility of larger, even intangible, comforts.
lifehacks  lifehacker  life  lesson  student  of  life  life  hacker  western  lifestyle  quality  of  life  lifelessons  lifelesson  self-respect  Self-esteem  psychology  book  society  long-term  thinking  short-term  thinking  discomfort  HR  human  resources  people  management 
june 2014 by asterisk2a
oftwominds-Charles Hugh Smith: The Changing Nature of Middle Class Work
The economy is changing in structural ways that affect not just the job market but the nature of work itself. If we ask, what is work?, the conventional answer is tasks that somebody will pay us to do. This is true, but it doesn't address why someone is willing to pay us. The answer is to create value. ... [ Skills, not Expertise. ] ...... As technology's ability to replace costly human labor moves from the factory floor to the service sector, the nature of middle class work is changing. [ IBM's company wide Pivot over +10 years from HW to Services and Software Company. With the accompanying downsizing. ] ... Jobs that can be learned in a few hours are prone to being replaced by machines. [...] The protected sectors beset by soaring costs (healthcare, higher education, major weaponry programs, finance, etc.) will undergo the creative destruction of technology-based productivity gains for the reason that they are already unaffordable, not just to households but to the nation.
skill-biased  technological  change  knowledge  worker  White-collar  Blue-collar  working  poor  value  creation  digital  economy  New  21st  Century  squeezed  middle  class  inequality  tax  code  tax  free  income  Gini  coefficient  elizabethwarren  globalization  globalisation  Robots  Robotics  technological  history  disrupting  markets  disruption  Innovation  productivity  Mobile  Creatives  creative  destruction  Book  Structural  Impediments  deficit  unemployment  imbalance  economics  workless  6-hour  work  day  working  class  work  life  balance  workplace  chaning  face  of  work  Future  Charles  Hugh  Smith  education  bubble  formal  education  coding  Higher  MOOC  education  USA  Europe  Asia  BRIC  UK  2014  Year  of  commodity  business  commoditization  lifestyle  purchasing  power  wage  stagnation  middle  class  automation  open  source  innovator  collaboration  global  economy  global  supply  chain  supply  chain  content  creator  digital  artist  Networking  social  capital  hybrid  work  flexible  work  Problem  Solving  Problemsolvers  work  experience  global  in  nature  free  trade  global  trade  Sweat  Equity  Gary  Vaynerchuk  accountable  lifestyle  businesses  lifestyle  business  workplace  security  human  capital  reputation  capital  skills  underemployed  Employability  part-time  employment  youth  unemployment  employment  of  lifehacker  life  life  of  life  l 
may 2014 by asterisk2a
Martha Nussbaum - The Fragility of Goodness - YouTube
“Our emotional life maps our incompleteness: A creature without any needs would never have reasons for fear, or grief, or hope, or anger.” || http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2012/10/12/martha-nussbaum-take-my-advice/ + “To be a good human being is to have a kind of openness to the world, an ability to trust uncertain things beyond your own control.” || http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2014/03/14/martha-nussbaum-bill-moyers-world-of-ideas/ || || Polluted by things we can not control. ... Tragedy comes only to those who live life. || Being a human means accepting promises from other people and trusting that other people will be good to you. When that is too much to bear, it is always possible to retreat into the thought, “I’ll live for my own comfort, for my own revenge, for my own anger, and I just won’t be a member of society anymore.” That really means, “I won’t be a human being anymore.”
Philosophy  life  lesson  life  hacker  student  of  life  civic  life  vulnerable  vulnerability  leadership  western  lifestyle  work  life  balance  lifelessons  lifehacks  lifestyle  quality  of  life  ethical  life  ethical  beliefs  uncertainty  unknown  unknowns  ethics  life  human  beings  circumstances  moral  life  morals  moral  beliefs  morality  struggle  value  of  moral  life  corporate  governance  governance  Martha  Nussbaum  civilisation  society  social  science  social  society  Free  Will  human  tragedy  human  rights  compassion  unintended  consequences 
april 2014 by asterisk2a
Kris Carr speaks about cancer and The China Study - YouTube
Slowed significantly, Stable Cancer ('incurable'). See more peer reviewed medical research (evidence based) on it :: http://nutritionfacts.org/index.php?s=cancer + http://nutritionfacts.org/index.php?s=prostate+cancer + https://www.youtube.com/user/KrisCarrTV // https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyWTj4Xh-rY + https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2iPurl324Q + // https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGvM0exvn2c << self-care, self care, public health policy, public health, health crisis, health science, sustainability, sustainable, 'cancer begins in early age, tiny micro cancer cells; its about the environment we create - one where cancer flourishes or where one that doesn't and thus it can't kill you.' Bottled juices in Stores are pasteurised and laden with extra sugar and preservatives. BAD! | http://youtu.be/EbkWhGbB50k "living in the moment. being present." *Marie Forleo + productivity. + http://youtu.be/kQrzeRL2Zkc :: Kris Carr & Marie Forleo - Personal Brand
Standard  American  Diet  western  lifestyle  western  pattern  Vegan  Raw  Cancer  breast  estrogen  receptor  negative  breast  skin  oral  cervical  prostate  China  Study  Book  Kris  Carr  Whole  Foods  chemotherapy  lifestyle  medicine  lifestyle  immune  system  Acceptance  lifehacks  lifehacker  life  hacker  lifelessons  work  life  balance  quality  of  life  life  lesson  lifelesson  chronic  low-grade  inflammation  inflammation  chronic  stress  Oxidative  stress  stress  prevention  charity  anti-inflammatory  functional  medicine  integrative  medicine  happiness  student  of  life  self-care  self  care  public  health  policy  public  health  health  crisis  health  science  sustainability  sustainable  mental  health  health  policy  healthcare  living  environment  environment  Environmental  Movement  disaster  epigenetics  genetics  Gluten  Free  sensitivity  IGF-1  growth  hormone  Dairy  Industry  carcinogen  carcinogenic  Casein  sugar  insuline  insulin  resistant  Meat  Industry  Industrial  Farming  alkaline  Food  Inc.  processed  Food  Chain  Fast  Food  junk  security  prices  poverty  post-antibiotic  era  antibiotics  Lobby  Lobbying  lobbyist  fungicide  herbicide  pesticide  active  lifestyle  HIIT  Lymphatic  system  lymph  node  lymph  gland  exercise  Fibromyalgia  Arthritis 
april 2014 by asterisk2a
Want To Be Happier? Stop Comparing Yourself To What You See On Social Media | Fast Company | Business Innovation
SOCIAL MEDIA IS BASICALLY SOCIAL COMPARISON ON STEROIDS. Instead of comparing yourself to others, re-focus your energy on what matters to you, says Sally Anne Giedrys, a Portland, Oregon-based career coach. “The more we pay attention to others, the less we are grounded in ourselves and what matters to us,” she says. “It can be fueled by a lack of purpose, direction, or commitment within our own lives.”
Social  Media  science  society  status  study  Gini  coefficient  inequality  income  inequality  life  lesson  Public  life  hacker  western  lifestyle  western  society  lifelessons  lifehacks  lifehacker  work  life  balance  lifestyle  quality  of  life  Facebook  Instagram  happiness  Twitter  Vine  YouTube  Vlog 
march 2014 by asterisk2a
▶ Eat Your Kimchi Full Interview Part 1 - YouTube
+ part2 - /watch?v=hLwkRrV4XIg (later part talking about differences [audience, niche, taste] between social networks, tumblr, twitter, facebook) + Our Love Story - /watch?v=1EeZIU_zZzo + TL;DR - How Simon Proposed to Martina - /watch?v=jnpIpdFfk2k + Draw My Life - Simon's Story - /watch?v=1EPO1Zblq3o
relationship  relationships  partnerships  partners  partner  communication  adaulthood  dating  friend  zone  marriage  lifelessons  lifelesson  lifehacks  lifehacker  Social  Media  socialnetwork  socialnetworks  YouTube  Eat  Your  Kimchi  South  Korea 
november 2013 by asterisk2a
Limbic Revision: How Love Rewires the Brain | Brain Pickings
In a relationship, one mind revises the other; one heart changes its partner. This astounding legacy of our combined status as mammals and neural beings is limbic revision: the power to remodel the emotional parts of the people we love, as our Attractors [coteries of ingrained information patterns] activate certain limbic pathways, and the brain’s inexorable memory mechanism reinforces them. Who we are and who we become depends, in part, on whom we love. [...] Real, honest, complete love requires letting go.
relationship  lifelessons  partnerships  environment  partners  book  social  science  lifelesson  relationships  social  study  personality  changes 
october 2013 by asterisk2a
Relax! You’ll Be More Productive - NYTimes.com
I love this kind of research: Take more breaks and vacations, and sleep more, and you'll be more productive! time is a limited resource.
lifehacker  active  lifestyle  lifelessons  work  life  balance  stress  western  lifestyle  lifehacks  lifelesson  productivity 
february 2013 by asterisk2a
Kommentar: Warum wir von Schumachers Aus bei Mercedes lernen können - SPIEGEL ONLINE
Siegchancen hatte er mit dem Mercedes damals nicht mal ansatzweise, trotzdem hielt er Weltmeister Jenson Button die Hälfte des Rennens hinter sich. Wer Zeuge davon war, mit welcher Leidenschaft Schumacher diesen Kampf austrug, weiß, warum er in die Formel 1 zurückgekehrt ist. Der Mann kann einfach nicht anders. Und wir können uns schon mal darauf einstellen, dass er solange fährt, wie jemand ihm ein Cockpit anbietet - und Frau, Familie und seine Gesundheit es zulassen.
Ist das verwerflich? Nein, warum auch? Michael Schumacher hat sich dazu entschieden, seinem Hobby nachzugehen. Dass er das vor einem Millionenpublikum tut - damit kann er offenkundig gut umgehen. Er scheint eine Lässigkeit erreicht zu haben, nach der viele Menschen streben, aber die nur wenige erlangen.

Schumacher schert sich nicht mehr darum, was andere Leute über ihn denken. Er lebt das Leben, das er leben möchte.
lifelessons  lancearmstrong  sports  Sport  Michael  Schumacher 
september 2012 by asterisk2a
The myth of Psyche — Paulo Coelho's Blog
love is an act of faith in another person, and her face shall stay covered in mystery.

Each moment shall be lived and enjoyed, but whenever we try to understand it, the magic disappears.

[...]

trust in Love, even running the risk of erring.

[...]

who sought to find safety in knowledge, found insecurity.

Those who don’t accept it and always seek an explanation for the magic and mysterious, human relations will lose the best of what life has to offer.
PauloCoelho  marriage  love  relationship  relationships  lifelessons  life 
august 2012 by asterisk2a
Nora Ephron, who died this week, passes on the advice she wished she'd known sooner | Mail Online
Oh, how I regret not having worn a bikini for the entire year I was 26. If anyone young is reading this, go, right this minute, put on a bikini, and don’t take it off until you’re 34.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2166679/Nora-Ephron-died-week-passes-advice-wished-shed-known-sooner.html#ixzz1zESuazdc
life  lifehacker  lifelessons  lifehacks  women  aging 
june 2012 by asterisk2a
Lob des Mittelmaßes und Durchschnitts: Gut ist uns selten gut genug - SPIEGEL ONLINE
"Mittelmaß heißt nicht Stillstand, heißt nicht sich treiben zu lassen. Auch das Mittelmaß bedarf steter Anstrengung und eines gewissen Eifers", schrieb Markus Reiter in seinem Buch "Lob des Mittelmaßes". "Es heißt aber sehr wohl, die Beschränktheit menschlicher Möglichkeiten zu erkennen. Das Mittelmaß ist somit das menschengerechteste Maß."
"Haben oder Sein?", fragte einst Erich Fromm und hoffte damit "die seelischen Grundlagen einer neuen Gesellschaft" zu beschreiben. Man hat ihn gelesen, gefeiert und vergessen: Heute ist der was, der was hat. Nur: Haben wir nicht alles, was wir brauchen? Wollen und verlangen wir nicht permanent zu viel?
mittelstand  average  culture  society  lifehacks  lifehacker  lifelessons 
june 2012 by asterisk2a
Money can't make you happy... if you are only spending it to impress others | Mail Online
Spending money on once in a lifetime experiences from luxury holidays to concert tickets won't make you happy, according to a surprise study.
But before you cancel that world cruise it's worth noting that you'll only fail to find contentment if your motive is to impress others.
'Why you buy is just as important as what you buy,' said assistant profressor Ryan Howell, from San Francisco State University, who led the study.
'When people buy life experiences to impress others, it wipes out the well-being they receive from the purchase. That extrinsic motivation appears to undermine how the experiential purchase meets their key psychological needs.'
lifestyle  lifehacker  lifelessons  relationships  psychology  money  relationship  consumption  wealth  management  wealth 
june 2012 by asterisk2a
Studie zum Genuss: Deutsche haben das Genießen verlernt - SPIEGEL ONLINE
Die Forscher haben im Laufe der Studie eine typisch deutsche Abfolge von Wohlgefühl entschlüsselt. Sie nennen es Genuss-DNA. Am Anfang steht das Gefühl, sich etwas verdient zu haben. Dann wird der ersehnte Genuss vorbereitet, zum Beispiel mit einem Wellness-Tag. Doch die größte Hürde kommt noch: loslassen und den Kopf freikriegen. Wenn dann noch ein positiv überraschender Moment hinzukommt, kann der ganzheitliche Hochgenuss folgen.
lifehacks  lifehacker  lifelessons 
may 2012 by asterisk2a
15 SEC READING: Insult the dead — Paulo Coelho's Blog
“Pay no heed to the insults of men, nor to their praise; in this way, you shall forge your own path.”
lifestyle  life  lifelessons  lifehacks  lifehacker 
may 2012 by asterisk2a
The five regrets — Paulo Coelho's Blog
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
life  lifelessons  lifehacks  lifehacker  regret 
may 2012 by asterisk2a
Führungskräfte: "Erfolg haben die Härtesten, nicht die Besten" - SPIEGEL ONLINE
18-Stunden-Tage, enormer Druck, abgeschottet in der Vorstands-Festung - wo bleibt da der Blick über den Tag hinaus? Die Führungskultur in Deutschland gehört erneuert,

Allmendinger: In den Gesprächen zeigte sich, dass es für die Top-Manager ganz persönlich ein Problem ist. Viele fühlen sich getrieben, die Schreibtische und Mailboxen sind übervoll. Es fehlt die Zeit innezuhalten und sich zu fragen: Wo sehe ich mich in zwei Wochen, in zwei Monaten, geschweige denn in zwei Jahren?

Leipprand: Den enormen Druck aushalten zu können - das wird zunehmend zum Auslesekriterium für Führungskräfte. Übrigens gilt das nicht nur für die Wirtschaft, sondern auch für den öffentlichen Sektor. Nur wer auf Dauer 18-Stunden-Tage aushält, kommt nach oben.

Wir sind der Meinung, dass wir eine neue Führungspraxis in Deutschland brauchen. Und das beschränkt sich nicht nur auf die obersten Entscheider. Wer Führungspositionen übernimmt - egal an welcher Stelle in der Gesellschaft -, der muss sich seiner ....
moral  lifehacker  lifelessons  reflection  philosophy  society  sociology  humanresources  business  leadership 
april 2012 by asterisk2a
The Downside of Cohabiting Before Marriage - NYTimes.com
Couples who cohabit before marriage (and especially before an engagement or an otherwise clear commitment) tend to be less satisfied with their marriages — and more likely to divorce — than couples who do not. These negative outcomes are called the cohabitation effect.

The majority of young adults in their 20s will live with a romantic partner at least once, and more than half of all marriages will be preceded by cohabitation. This shift has been attributed to the sexual revolution and the availability of birth control, and in our current economy, sharing the bills makes cohabiting appealing. But when you talk to people in their 20s, you also hear about something else: cohabitation as prophylaxis.

ie You would only marry someone if he or she agreed to live together with you first, so that you could find out whether you really get along.

But that belief is contradicted by experience.
The "gradual slope" of relationships makes the couple bypass talking about why & what is happening
love  convenience  lifelessons  change  Behavior  behavioral  economics  culture  psychology  gender  asymmetry  single  gender  study  advice  relationship  marriage  relationships 
april 2012 by asterisk2a
Peter Dinklage Was Smart to Say No - NYTimes.com
Peter Dinklage who shot to fame with his role in Game of Thrones about ... LUCK / HARD WORK / PERSISTENCE / patience / deferred gratification ...

“I feel really lucky,” he said, then added, “although I hate that word — ‘lucky.’ ” When I asked him why, he mulled it over for a moment, looking away. Then he focused back on me. “It cheapens a lot of hard work,” he said. “Living in Brooklyn in an apartment without any heat and paying for dinner at the bodega with dimes — I don’t think I felt myself lucky back then. Doing plays for 50 bucks and trying to be true to myself as an” — here he put on a faux snooty voice — “artist and turning down commercials where they wanted a leprechaun. Saying I was lucky negates the hard work I put in and spits on that guy who’s freezing his ass off back in Brooklyn. So I won’t say I’m lucky. I’m fortunate enough to find or attract very talented people. For some reason I found them, and they found me.”
life  lifelessons  hard  work  luck 
march 2012 by asterisk2a
Get Rich or Die Trying | TechCrunch
“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”
President Calvin Coolidge

Determination is critical to success as overnight successes actually take years to build; indeed, “overnight successes” are a myth.
lifelessons  life-style  lifehacker  lifehacks  advice  education  entrepeneurship  success 
march 2012 by asterisk2a
Stay Or Leave? Book says you can work out whether he's Mr Right, or just Mr Right Now | Mail Online
Step 1: Start being yourself, not the person everyone else wants you to be
Step 2: Don’t worry what others think
Step 3: Resolve your split personality
Step 4: You’re not as trapped as you think you are
Step 5: Live by your own values
Step 6: Consider what you’d do if you knew you had only six months to live
lifelessons  lifehacker  lifehacks  life-style  life  love  advice  relationships  relationship 
january 2012 by asterisk2a

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