YouTube -- AncestryFoundation: Grace Liu, PharmD: Solution to the Identity Crisis of the Ancestral Gut
'The gut microbiota has undergone radical changes. Human gut anatomy are unaltered but the microbial ecosystems have degraded. Health may mirror these changes and how we acquire our microbiota including the ways we procure our food - shifting at the neolithic from tedious hand foraging to village crops to (now) massive, post-industrial farming operations and livestock production. Our distance from the dirt is immeasurable. New technology allows characterization of the ancestral gut. Comparatively, species in ancestral and non-industrialized guts are robust in diversity and less fragile in balance. Ways to resolve this 'gut identity' crisis involve re-wilding and revisiting the ancestral, soil-connected gut.'
biology  evolution  bacteria  food  health  disease 
14 hours ago
YouTube -- NPR: The Invisible Universe Of The Human Microbiome
'The next time you look in a mirror, think about this: In many ways you're more microbe than human. There are 10 times more cells from microorganisms like bacteria and fungi in and on our bodies than there are human cells. But these tiny compatriots are invisible to the naked eye. So we asked artist Ben Arthur to give us a guided tour of the rich universe of the human microbiome.'
bacteria  health 
15 hours ago
Evolution Counseling -- The Appeal Of A Boring Life
'A highly structured life where all variables are known and seemingly under control combats the existential anxiety cued off by the threat of mortality. This is the appeal of a boring life. The tradeoff usually occurs at the unconscious level and it’s basically “I’m willing to sacrifice novelty for the reduction of my painful existential anxiety.” -- When a structured routine is followed uncertainty is eliminated and the illusion is cultivated that life will be the same forever. Change is a grim reminder of mortality. The boring life seeks to stop change in its tracks and thereby stop mortality in its tracks. -- The irony of this strategy is that mortality still looms, time keeps marching at its steady pace. But from the relative point of view the days, weeks, months, and years actually fly by much faster when they all resemble one another. The secret hope is to cheat death with a boring life but subjectively speaking death arrives much sooner than if novel experiences are sought out along the way.'
psychology  existentialism  control 
YouTube -- Honey Badger Radio: Honey Badger 04: Damseled to death
Alison/TyphonBlue: "...Threat Narratives are a way of removing those limiters on our ability to hurt each other, and it increases our ability to endure that kind of sympathetic pain whenever we inflict pain on each other. And we do that by inflating the sense of threat from the target group and looking at them as being sexually sinister... And one of the big ways we do that and maintain that as something we do is that we inflate women's vulnerability because the most essential component of a Threat Narrative is a damsel, is someone who is 'vulnerable', who can encapsulate the vulnerability of a society or just a group of people. So, women throughout the ages have the encapsulated the vulnerabilities of their society. And when you have a damsel, you can have a villain. A damsel in a story defines both the villain and the hero. The villain – the man usually – is the person who is threatening her, and the hero is the one who protect and saves her. But it all starts with the damsel having vulnerabilities, and having the recognition of vulnerabilities. So, if you look at the function the damsel in society it's like damsels are a debuff, they debuff that instinctual compassion that we have for each other. So every act of violence and atrocity is preceded by women damselling in order to debuff our sense of compassion for the target group. Just to use those two Threat Narratives that I was describing before: it was the vulnerability of Aryan women to Jewish men and being defiled by Jewish men that defined the center of Nazi Germany's Threat Narrative. It's the fact that Aryan women were damselling and vulnerable that incited them to these acts of violence... And when you look at the Jim Crow Threat Narrative, the same thing is happening: the vulnerability of white, southern womanhood to black men's sexual menace that debuffed that community, that took away our sympathy for black people. Everything starts with identifying a damsel and then presenting that damsel or groups of damsels as vulnerable to this particular target group. And in the process of doing that you remove all sympathy for that target group and then any act of violence is justified against them... You cannot have this debuff work if you don't encourage or even demand or force women into a role of vulnerability relative to men. That's where it all begins. Because that's how you generate the damselling. That's how you generate the ability of women to damsel to such a level that they can take away a group's sympathy. But also how you generate the ability for the men in their group to ignore their own vulnerability, to think of themselves as being invulnerable, and thus sacrifice themselves in violence against the target group. And so it all begins with the damsel and forcing women to damsel... I think this is actually at the heart of GamerGate, too. Because what I think is happening with games is that games, as a medium, are encouraging women to step away from their role as damsels and to start to see themselves in terms of their actions, which means that how we've organised ourselves as a society, how we generate not just our ability to create atrocities, to justify authoritarianism, but also to encourage men to feel ashamed and feel like they have to work compulsively to earn a sense of positive identity – all of that is under threat – our entire social fabric is under threat simply because games are siphoning off women away from the damsel identity to an identity of strength and consequence and action-taking. And I think that's what, essentially, the feminist encroachment on the gaming community is about: it's about herding women back into the reservation and making sure they fulfil the role that is foundational to the structure of our society."
men  women  feminism  victimhood  predation  dehumanization  violence  sacrifice  agencyvspatiency  thegamingofeverydaylife  *  psychohistory 
6 days ago
Aeon -- [Natural police]: Game theory’s cure for corruption by Suzanne Sadedin
'Who watches the watchers? In 2010, two researchers at the University of Tennessee built a game-theoretical model to examine just this problem. The results, published by Francisco Úbeda and Edgar Duéñez-Guzmán in a paper called ‘Power and Corruption’, were, frankly, depressing. Nothing, they concluded, would stop corruption from dominating an evolving police system. Once it arose, it would remain stable under almost any circumstances. The only silver lining was that the bad police could still suppress defection in the rest of society. The result was a mixed population of gullible sheep and hypocritical overlords. Net wellbeing does end up somewhat higher than it would be if everyone acted entirely selfishly, but all in all you end up with a society rather like that of the tree wasps. -- We seem to revel in generating and enforcing arbitrary social rules, from Catholic confession to the ritual nose-bleeding of Sambia men in Papua New Guinea. Granted, our punishments for minor infringements are usually subtle: a joke, a snub, a verbal rebuke. But don’t underestimate their impact. Repeat offenders are likely to find themselves gradually ostracised, mateless and unsupported in times of need. Evolutionarily speaking, social rejection might as well be a death sentence for humans. -- And this is not the full extent of our moral flexibility. Even as we ruthlessly enforce our codes, we try to cheat them. Lord Acton claimed in 1887 that ‘power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely’, and the evidence supports him. In a 2010 study, the researchers Joris Lammers at the University of Cologne and Adam Galinsky at Columbia Business School primed their subjects to feel either powerful or powerless. Those who felt powerful condemned others’ hypothetical immoral behaviour more harshly than those who felt powerless. But at the same time, the powerful cheated more on a game of dice, and then readily forgave themselves. -- Such hypocrisy makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. As the Rutgers biologist Robert Trivers put it in Deceit and Self-Deception (2011), we evolved to fool ourselves so we could better fool others. Righteousness is a sound strategy for the young revolutionary surrounded by righteous peers. On the road to power, you need allies who must be convinced of your sincerity. But once you have cemented your position, you can most improve your fitness with covert acts of selfishness, justified by a new-found sense of entitlement. -- Our tendency towards righteousness might be triggered when we feel equal to our potentially righteous compatriots; and the more secure we feel in our power over them, the more we switch to corruption. -- ... Imagine, if you will, a society where the laser eye of social condemnation is trained on every possible transgression... -- As early as the 18th century, the economist Bernard Mandeville envisaged a transition to perfect, peer-enforced co‑operation – and argued that it could only end in disaster. In his book The Fable of the Bees (1714), he depicted a society where prosperity and progress derive from endless conflict over ubiquitous corruption: Thus Vice nursed Ingenuity, / Which join’d with Time, and Industry / Had carry’d Life’s Conveniencies, / It’s real Pleasures, Comforts, Ease, / To such a Height, the very Poor / Lived better than the Rich before -- Jove, in a fit of irony, curses the bees with honesty. Their wealth promptly dissolves, society stagnates, and the population dwindles as the virtuous bees are unable so much as to contemplate any sort of creative rebellion. Sometimes it’s good to bend the rules. But which ones?'
morality  corruption  psychology  serotonin  status  power  equiveillance  anonequiveillance  civility 
7 days ago
YouTube -- Honey Badger Radio: Badgerpod Gamergate 14: They Set Us Up The Bomb!
Alison/TyphonBlue: "There seems to be a blindness that people don't realise that their pet ideology, if it cannot be questioned, it turns into this malignant thing. And the people who use it to get their thrill of vomiting other people out of polite society – they get this thrill out of rejecting people, this visceral thrill of ejecting people from their social group. It's power. And it is an addiction. It's an addiction to this process of ejecting people from the human group...When you give any particular moral philosophy that unquestioned authority, people ... are drawn to simply ejecting others out of a society. ... Every time we have a moral philosophy that gets into ascendency, these people, these individuals of a certain merit, take it over and start using it to eject people. And it happens every single time. Every single time."
morality  ideology  groups  power  status  serotonin 
7 days ago
The Onion -- Treasury Department Honors Women With First Female Currency
'“For too long, our currency has only been representative of half the country, but beginning today, women in the United States will finally be able to carry and use money that’s the same sex they are,” said Treasury Secretary Jack Lew, adding that the new female banknotes would feature softer green hues and a slightly smaller, shapelier form. “By introducing female currency into circulation, we are celebrating the strong and vital roles that women have played in shaping our nation. And when today’s girls see legal tender that is composed of both male and female bills, it sends a powerful message about our nation’s commitment to equality.” Lew followed his announcement by noting that the Treasury would introduce the first openly gay dimes into the economy as early as next year.'
TheOnion  feminism  satire 
7 days ago
After Psychotherapy -- The Ones Who Let Go
'I “let go” of an old friend last year, but in truth, I think he had already let go of me. A certain formality had entered into his emails and I found it painful, shaming in a way, as if he were saying he no longer wanted to be close to me, that I wasn’t “worth it.”'
psychology  shame 
7 days ago
Evolution Counseling -- Disinterest As Abuse
'To children parents are godlike figures whose words and actions carry all the weight of judgments from on high. Children don’t have any grounds for comparison. Interactions take on dimensions that are larger than life. In the mind of the child, the primary relationship doesn’t represent how things are in one specific family situation, it doesn’t take the cultural context or any other variable into account. It simply represents how things are, period. -- For children the equation is quite simple. Interest and attention equal love and result in the feeling of being lovable while disinterest and inattention equal lack of love and result in the feeling of being unlovable. -- Disinterest is saying, without ever saying it outright, “You are not worthy of my concern.” This secret feeling of being unworthy in the eyes of others is the specter that haunts all subsequent relationships. -- Intimacy is incompatible with disinterest, which means that if the secret feeling is that no one is or ever could be truly interested then this feeling is going to profoundly influence not only the ability but also the desire to forge intimate relationships. The unconscious belief is that the other simply isn’t interested, that any manifestations of positive affect must be inauthentic or if these manifestations are authentic they must be based on false information and at some point that underlying unworthiness will be discovered.' -- You were orphaned by indifference...
psychology  neglect  shame  abuse  schizoid 
7 days ago
The Art of Manliness -- Wants Vs. Likes
'Let us end this discussion with the insights of our friend Jack London, who explained the essence and significance of authentic liking in regards to how he and his wife wanted to sail around the world, while their friends thought the idea was nuts: '...The ultimate word is I Like. It lies beneath philosophy, and is twined about the heart of life. When philosophy has maundered ponderously for a month, telling the individual what he must do, the individual says, in an instant, “I Like,” and does something else… That is why I am building the [ship]. I am so made. I like, that is all.”''
psychology  authenticity  individuation 
7 days ago
Personality Junkie -- Introverts’ vs. Extraverts’ Career Path
'...Unfortunately, what we might call introverts’ “self-knowledge project” often takes longer to complete than anticipated.'
psychology  personality  introversion  INTP 
12 days ago
Learning Lisp -- Do you know any programmers that exhibit these personality traits…?
Comment: A.R.M: '...He is obviously an INTP with particularly strong extroverted intuition (Ne.) If someone is labeled ADD/ADHD, it usually means they have primary or secondary extroverted intuition. It’s a normal personality trait. This means a few things: #He is heavily right-brained. Call it artsy or whatever, but he has a firm grasp of holistics. #Abstract logic is unnatural for him. He can’t reason about something independently of it. He first has to consume the subject so that its mechanism are clearly visible. He reasons about things by interning and “simulating” them. #This interning and simulation is powerful. He can struggle for a bit when learning something new, and often appear dumb, but it’s something of a snowball effect, and once he learns something, he *knows* it. It’s interned and inside his right brain which is the “parallel processor.” So he can “see” how everything fits together, and when a problem presents itself, a solution is rarely more than a few instant lookups away. This is across his entire “knowledge base.” #Extroverted intuition is very intelligent. Kids with Ne are usually bored as fuck at school because the things they’re learning are usually too easy or intrinsically boring. But of course, motherfuckers have to cure anything that doesn’t look like them, so motherfuckers invent ADD for the extroverts with Ne (ENFP/ENTP) and ADHD for the introverts with Ne (INFP/INTP) #He is probably bored as fuck right now. If he’s lazying around and stuff, he could be in a bout of disillusionment/existential depression. This is in sharp contrast to the same type of person who has found their passion. Einstein is such a person, who from the outside may have appeared to be a “hard worker,” but what he did was not work to him. #He is a creative. His task is creating things, not actually building them. Doing “detailed” things runs counter to the grain of his nature. This might sound questionable, because what use is someone who just comes up with things and doesn’t help implement them? Well, he’s not just creative. He’s *intensely* creative. Part of it is that he “knows” the subjects he’s pondering, and part of it is that the nature of Ne is very heuristic. But the point is that if you put him in a position where he is a creative director (say, lead tech., UI/interface/experience/usability design, etc) then he will be in his element, and he will do his job amazingly. But as soon as you have him dealing with deep details, his energy will start to drain rapidly. Novelty is his fuel, and without it he is a crippled shell.'
psychology  INTP  ADHD 
14 days ago
Evolution Counseling -- Insight And Loneliness
'There’s one thing people don’t tell you about increasing insight for self-actualization, and this is that by its very nature it’s a difficult, lonely process. We can only share those elements of our lives that we have in common with others. Increasing insight around Self, others, and the world means becoming poignantly aware of differences, becoming poignantly aware of individuality, not to mention doing away with many of the comforting illusions that were unconsciously in place to feel connected. -- Mental health professionals rally around the banner of insight. They believe it’s the key to wellness. And they’re right up to a point, but only when a way is found to complete the circle in order to reintegrate with the world, to cut through that sense of isolation that follows in the wake of increased insight, to go back to simply being in the world in addition to thinking about being in the world.'
psychology  individuation  existentialism 
15 days ago
Ribbonfarm -- Weaponized Sacredness by Sarah Perry
'Why the surprise? Why does a phenomenon so seemingly inevitable in hindsight go unforeseen? -- Preference falsification is an information theory term for the tendency for people to express a public preference that is different from their private, interior preference. For various reasons, certain preferences may not be publicly acceptable to express; they may be punished by execution, or labor camps, or exile, or social exclusion, or at the very least suspicion and a risk of some of these things. When people do not express their true preferences, they are deprived of the opportunity to coordinate with each other to create a more preferable outcome for both. Preference falsification is not just a political phenomenon, but a product of our dual nature, experiencing ourselves on the one hand from the privileged first-person perspective, and on the other hand from the imagined perspective of others. Pretending to have different preferences than one really does may be necessary to maintain a sense of safety, social belonging, and status. -- People’s expressed, public preferences are a function of both their interior preferences and the perceived acceptability of revealing them; other people’s expressed preferences serve as a guide for measuring acceptability. So people’s expressed preferences are in part a function of other people’s expressed preferences. Under certain circumstances, when the distribution of preferences is right, a domino effect may be begun by a single dissenter, toppling the status quo of preference falsification. One dissenter may embolden others, and then together with them give the impression that it is acceptable for others to express their true preferences. On the other hand, people whose preferences are satisfied by the status quo may find it wise to begin to falsify their preferences when a revolution begins to look imminent. -- ... The important point is that it [a new preference falsification regime] functions as a new sacredness, something that is so important that we agree not to examine it too closely, and to only speak of it in respectful, ideologically correct terms. But it is disturbing to watch a new sacredness be born, no matter how benign it seems, because like the water locked up for now in a dam, the path it might take in the future is inscrutable and hard to control. -- #2. Sacredness implies an in-group and an out-group. In-group members are perceivers of the sacredness (or competent pretenders); out-group members are non-perceivers, heretics, enemies of the group. -- #12. Anything attacking or threatening a preference falsification equilibrium usually wants to replace it with a different preference falsification equilibrium. -- #13. The new order brought about by a change in sacredness may make everyone worse off than before, and it is impossible to predict its effects before the fact.'
ideology  panarchy  sociology 
15 days ago
Aeon -- Digital storytelling revives the art of gossip by Katherine May
'Doubtless, the internet has provided us with a new set of tools through which we can make our own mark on the stories that fascinate us, but we must not mistake the medium for the message. The internet didn’t create this kind of story: in fact, it’s probably the oldest narrative form of all. This is narrative as a rolling multitude of voices; a story that has no controllable ending, fading instead into a network of other tales told by a network of other people. It is the narrative of everyday life, of friends we know well and not-so-well, and the ways we use their narratives to prop up our own. We know this kind of story as deeply as we know language. This has huge implications for writers. It reveals that we’re not as keen on neat narrative arcs and emotional closure as we thought we were.'
internet  storytelling  gossip  #bandwidth  #diversity  socialmedia  cognitivesurplus 
15 days ago
YouTube -- Honey Badger Radio: Safe Space to Silence
Hannah: "The thing about the term 'safe space' is yet another feminist co-opted term. This was a therapy term – a twelve-step programme term – where you were supposed to be able to go into these places whether it is was group therapy or the type of therapy that you have in a twelve-step programme, and basically say 'I fell down.' And instead of having somebody go: 'Oh! You're a bad person for falling down! You screwed up! Shame on you!' go: 'Okay. How can we work together to help you not do that again and do better next time?' And so on. It was originally a thing of being able to deal functionally with dysfunction – not a thing of not having to confront information that one didn't want to deal with. And feminists – just like they have with 'rape culture' – where the term originally referred to the tolerance and acceptance for rape in male prisons – the theft of the term 'safe space' has completely changed the meaning of the term and made it into the idea that it is acceptable for them to invade public spaces and pre-existing spaces within cultures that have had ways of people relating to each other and of interacting socially that have been established for years, and saying 'No. You have to change it to suit our sensibilities because we can't exist within the same space as you unless you do that.' It's a huge shame that they've been allowed to co-opt that term and use it this way because it destroys the originally intended meaning of it, it destroys the functionality of it, and takes it from something that was supposed to be a tool to help people improve themselves and their ability to handle things, and has turned it into a tool to make people more helpless, and more histrionic, and less functional in society. It's terrible to watch this happen." -- "...They may have, in one point in time, strictly used it as a therapeutic term but over time they've warped it into something entirely different. It's almost funny watching social justice warriors get everyone's panties in a bunch over their fear of words, but the reality is it's not funny watching it specifically because of their ability to use 'I'm afraid' as a tool of oppression, as a silencing tool. When it comes down to it, their use of 'safe spaces' has gone from: 'You don't have to be offended,' to: 'You can't talk; I can talk but you can't talk!' It's essentially turned political speech into a threat narrative. It comes from being so entrenched in your own ideology that you take for granted that it's right, and you treat conflicting ideas as an attack, instead of something to consider and evaluate and compare, and treat as an educational experience... it's aspect of a religious-type devotion to dogma. It becomes an exercise in resisting apostasy – blasphemy. And one of the particularly dangerous effects of this 'safe space' phenomenon that social justice warriors have created is the way it's being used to create hostile spaces. The term is being exploited by political ideologues – and it's not just in a way to create closed discussions where they can take a specific idea and extrapolate it into its most complex version and really evaluate it – but instead, like we saw in Calgary, to impose concepts on an audience without allowing the audience the opportunity for an informed assessment of those concepts, and it's basically become a way to encode censorship of political speech to protect that censorship itself from public scrutiny and criticism. So it's not really a 'safe space' for the people involved, and it's not really a 'safe space' for people's feelings, but it's a 'safe space' for encroachment of other people's right to make informed decisions. And social justice warriors will make a point of telling people 'You can't just bring x idea into *this* space! Go somewhere else!' But they're in the process of occupying all of the some-where-elses, and using that term 'safe space' to impose the same political censorship to an increasing degree with the apparent end game being to eliminate entirely any speech of which they disapprove. It's become a code word for 'This is how we take over a given environment or culture and impose our ideology on its inhabitants.' It's a lot like the Orwellian Newspeak where the term means exactly the opposite of what it actually says. The 'safe space' has become one of the most dangerous places to have a conversation."
feminism  victimhood  predation  evil  ideology  politicalcorrectness  illiberalism  thoughtpolice  newspeak  1984 
15 days ago
Psychology Today -- [Evolutionary Psychiatry]: Five Year Synthesis: Start Here Post by Emily Deans
'A whole foods diet will be appropriate food for the 100 trillion microbes that live in our guts. These microbes have immune, hormonal, and direct nerve communication with our brains, and they react to processed foods, particularly a flood of processed carbohydrates, in a very negative way that can lead to chronic whole body inflammation with the same type of inflammatory immune response found in people with major depressive disorder. There is also evidence that artificial sweeteners and the emulsifiers found in commercial salad dressings and many other processed foods negatively affect the gut biome.'
psychology  health  food  bacteria 
16 days ago
BBC -- What happens to our bodies after we die
'Putrefaction is associated with a marked shift from aerobic bacterial species, which require oxygen to grow, to anaerobic ones, which do not. These then feed on the body’s tissues, fermenting the sugars in them to produce gaseous by-products such as methane, hydrogen sulphide and ammonia, which accumulate within the body, inflating (or ‘bloating’) the abdomen and sometimes other body parts. This causes further discolouration of the body. As damaged blood cells continue to leak from disintegrating vessels, anaerobic bacteria convert haemoglobin molecules, which once carried oxygen around the body, into sulfhaemoglobin. The presence of this molecule in settled blood gives skin the marbled, greenish-black appearance characteristic of a body undergoing active decomposition. -- As the gas pressure continues to build up inside the body, it causes blisters to appear all over the skin surface. This is followed by loosening, and then ‘slippage’, of large sheets of skin, which remain barely attached to the deteriorating frame underneath. Eventually, the gases and liquefied tissues purge from the body, usually leaking from the anus and other orifices and frequently also leaking from ripped skin in other parts of the body. Sometimes, the pressure is so great that the abdomen bursts open.'
death  bacteria 
16 days ago
YouTube -- HoneyBadgerRadio: Badgerpod Gamergate 13: Celebrity Authority
Hannah: "They're very good at portraying themselves as the victims of other people's responses to their bullying..." -- Karen: "It is: Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denial#DARVO]. It's a classic technique of abuse by Cluster B personality disorders. You attack and attack and attack, and then when somebody finally says 'You're abusing me,' then you act as if that statement is an act of aggression – it's an attack on you – and then you play the victim, like, 'I'm so hurt that you would say that! You're such an abuser for saying that!' And it works so beautifully for people with Cluster B personality disorders, why wouldn't feminists employ it?"
psychology  abuse  victimhood  predation  evil 
19 days ago
Childhood Emotional Neglect -- Validation Validation Validation
'...Imagine a little child growing up without the kind of validation that my friend got from google; without the kind of validation that the subjects got in the self-esteem study. Without the kind of validation that Karen was finally able to get from Tom. -- Imagine this little child trying to understand himself, his world, and all the other people in it. Imagine that he doesn’t feel he can ask questions when he needs help. No one notices his feelings or emotional needs. No one says, “Let me explain this to you.” No one says, “Your feelings are normal.” No one says, “I’m here for you,” or “I see your emotions,” either by words or actions. -- This child is being sentenced to an entire life of seeking answers. An entire life of feeling like a non-person. An entire life of feeling less-than. An entire life of feeling angry or baffled or untethered, or all three. An entire lifetime of feeling invalid.'
psychology  childhood  neglect  INTP  shame 
19 days ago
What a Shrink Thinks -- The Dragon’s Pearl
'"Some say that originally every proper dragon carried a pearl under his chin…" ~ Ernest Ingersoll, Dragons and Dragon Lore -- "When a pearl oyster is injured, it will form a pearl sac to contain the wound...as part of the healing process. For wherever there is a pearl there is a monster lying on it, wherever there is a treasure, there is a snake wound around it… You cannot get near the Self and the meaning of life without being on the razor’s edge of falling into greed, into darkness, and into the shadowy aspect of the personality. One does not even know if it not necessary sometimes to fall into it, because otherwise it cannot be assimilated." ~ Marie Von Franz, Individuation in Fairy Tales -- ...no matter how strong we are, no matter how skilled, practiced, or well-analyzed, none of us makes it through this life without some profound vulnerability or limitation. We are all weakest at the site of a previous injury, and this is where both the dragon and its treasure settle: nearest to our most fragile and broken bits, in the weakened places that require the greatest courage for us to move toward, alongside our most stunted and undeveloped aspects. Only if we can face down powerful archetypal forces in our most vulnerable states will we really have a chance at a life worth living. -- And maybe this is also the sacred function of the dragon and the unconscious forces that call attention to the wounds: So that we remain cognizant of them, so we recognize that our injuries and our vitalities are always intertwined, so that we remember to return and visit and comprehend that life without our wounds really just means that we are less alive. -- So many come to psychotherapy seeking assistance to kill off their wounds, to repress their distress, to eliminate symptoms, to find a way to get away from their pain and somehow snatch happiness from its jaws. They are convinced that the serpent is the enemy. Just like those who petitioned Asclepius, (the Greek God of medicine) for healing, they stare at me flabbergasted when I suggest that they must sleep among the snakes and enter into relationship with their wound in order to be healed. Psychotherapy (as I practice it) is not, after all, the business of dragon slaying. It can only teach us the language of the serpents.'
psyhcology  psychotherapy  mythology  abyss  individuation 
21 days ago
The Rational Male -- The Political is Personal
Comment: Rollo Tomasi: 'From an evolutionary perspective it makes sense; women being the most environmentally at-risk sex needed a social collective to support each other (tribalism), nurture young and cooperatively sustain each other...This might explain women’s collectivist propensity to distribute resources co-equally to peers and only more on a by-need basis. It helps support the survival and proliferation of the collective. -- Now, that’s really simplistic, but put that dynamic into a social order and it looks a lot like socialism.'
men  women  collectivism  socialism 
21 days ago
The Rational Male -- Obesity Culture
'Women’s innate solipsism prevents them from ever truly attaining the egalitarian equalist fantasy they ride in order to consolidate that control. Women’s hindbrains want a better-than deal with regards to Hypergamy. Hypergamy doesn’t seek its own level, it wants, it expects a better than deserved exchange for its investment with a man, and it desperately wants assurances that its getting it. -- Thus, on a Hypergamous social scale we see that Protein World’s male focused ad gets no such vandalism. The message is clear – It is Men who must perform, Men who need to change themselves, optimize themselves and strive for the highest physical ideal to be granted female sexual approval. Women should be accepted, respected and expected to inspire genuine desire irrespective of men’s physical ideals. -- ...what we see in a feminine-primary societal order is really a reflection of the female sexual strategy writ large. When we see a culture of obesity, a culture of body fat acceptance and a culture that presumes a natural evolved order of innate differences between the sexes should be trumped by self-impressions of female personal worth, we’re viewing a society beholden to the insecurities inherent in women’s Hypergamy. -- A feminized, feminist, ordered social structure is one founded on ensuring the most undeserving women, by virtue of being women, are entitled to, and assured of, the best Hypergamous options by conscripting and conditioning men to comply with Hypergamy’s dictates.' -- Comment: ianironwood: 'Obesity culture and “fat acceptance” is a naive attempt by low-status women to group-shame men in the guise of “corporate patriarchy”, sure – but it’s much more aimed at their female peers who would go to such lengths. The Crab Basket hates anyone actually working that hard to get ahead – it’s too much effort, and there’s just too much Downton Abbey to watch. By using fat-shaming as the basis for a social justice crusade, the pro-chubby feminists are attempting to shame other women through the power of consensus, and thereby sabotage their willingness to expend an unequal amount of effort out of a misplaced sense of social guilt. -- The real message of the backlash is “You’re setting the bar too-high, and things suck enough for us already! If you skinny bitches don’t stop going to the gym and encouraging the beta-losers to do likewise, you’re compromising the integrity of the consensus concerning our assortive mating choices and encouraging these idiots to actually expect something out of us!” -- Low-SMV women have very little recourse, if the pool of available men in their bracket suddenly start having inflated expectations. The feminist/SJW fat-acceptance movement is essentially a false consensus, as the skinny bitches agreeing with the chub-power girls are faking it. They know the key to high SMV is serious effort . . . but by supporting “fat acceptance” they give their marginal competitors all of the reason they need to rationalize hitting Golden Corral instead of the gym. They use their chub friends to raise their comparative SMV while chattering about “body acceptance”. Meanwhile they’re woofing diet pills, doing yoga, and working out with their other fit friends, rationalizing what they’re doing as “healthy”. Nothing anti-social justice there.'
men  women  hypergamy  sacrifice 
21 days ago
YouTube -- TED: Sophie Scott: Why we laugh
'Did you know that you're 13 times more likely to laugh if you're with somebody else than if you're alone?'
psychology  affectregulation  bonding  laughter 
22 days ago
YouTube -- Emmy van Deurzen: Existential therapy: a philosophical approach to the big questions in life
'Emmy van Deurzen talks about the strengths of existential therapy in its philosophical heritage. She considers anxiety, freedom and meaning to be some of the most important aspects to consider when working with people.'
psychology  psychotherapy  existentialism  philosophy  freedom  EmmyvanDeurzen 
22 days ago
Evolution Counseling -- Detached Personality And Freedom
'People with detached personality are highly sensitive to any type of coercion, perceived or real. Their obstinate refusal to go along with this coercion can’t exactly be called rebelliousness since rebels are typically concerned with overthrowing the existing structure of things. Those who are emotionally detached just want nothing to do with the existing structure of things, they wish to be left in peace. -- These people were hurt earlier in life, usually by abusive primary caregivers. The route they took to find relief from this pain was to just stop caring about connecting. For them intimate relationships did and still do represent great danger because it wasn’t love and safety they felt in the most important intimate relationship of all, the primary relationship, but rather the feeling of helplessness in a hostile world. -- Resisting any type of coercion, avoiding groups, keeping people at a distance, all of these behaviors are fail safe plans designed to keep from getting hurt again. This is because people who are emotionally detached aren’t incapable of feeling, behind the walls they usually have rich emotional lives, emotional lives they feel safe expressing by themselves through art, music, movies, nature, etc. It’s just that they steadfastly refuse to share their emotional lives with anybody else. Sharing emotions led to such bad consequences in the past, in a time where they were coerced to do so, when they didn’t think they had a say in the matter. They do have a say now, and sadly they decide it’s much better to stay disengaged than it is to risk any relationship that could become coercive, where they could once again be forced to suffer through the pain of emotional abuse.' -- It is a joy to be hidden, and disaster not to be found. ~ D. W. Winnicott
psychology  attachment  schizoid  solitude  freedom 
22 days ago
Childhood Emotional Neglect -- Are You A WMBNT [Well-Meaning-But Neglected-Themselves] Parent?
'...No one in Edward’s life was attuned to his feelings and needs. No one ever asked Edward: How do you feel? What do you want? What do you need? Why are you angry, or sad, or hurt? -- As an adult, Edward can remember his mother’s drinking and violence. He can remember his father’s love. But he can’t remember what he didn’t get. So now with his own children, he can correct the things he remembers. But he can’t correct the things that he does not. So Edward does not ask his children those questions, as his parents did not ask him. -- Libby’s parents were both loving, and there was no abuse. But a very important ingredient was missing from her childhood. As an adult, Libby remembers her parents’ love for her, and she remembers caring for her siblings. She remembers feeling deprived of activities. -- But what Libby cannot remember is what she did not get. So she does not ask her children those questions either. As she drives them back and forth, buys them ice-cream and cheers for them at games, she fails to notice what they are feeling. She fails to ask them what they need. She fails to see when they are hurt or sad or in pain. And she fails to teach them how to manage any of that. -- Around and around the circle turns, delivering the numbing, isolating effects of CEN to another generation, and another and another. -- All the while, loving, well-meaning, caring parents work hard, care for their kids, and correct the wrongs that were done to them, unaware that they are failing their children in a most vital way. Unaware that they can reverse the circle. Unaware that they must give their children what they never got themselves. Unaware that they can.'
psyhcolohy  neglect  parenting 
22 days ago
Oliver Burkeman -- Does life have a beginning, middle and an end?
‘Does every scene of your life – childhood summers, first kisses, bereavements – have a connecting thread? Or are they different chapters? -- Could you have a meaningful life without this sense of continuity, this feeling that you are the person to whom your childhood happened, and who’ll experience your old age? -- I’d say I’m too interested in the question‚ “What has Oliver Burkeman made of his life?” Stressful decisions are usually stressful only because I worry Future Me might regret them. I doubt I’ll ever become an Episodic, but just knowing they exist, and imagining the world through their eyes, adds a lightness to my step. It’s much harder to fret about your future, or regret your past, when it doesn’t really feel as if they’re yours at all.'
psychology  memory  life 
22 days ago
Aeon Video -- What comes after religion?
'Large parts of the world are becoming vastly more secular. Do we know how to replace the benefits offered by religion?'
mythology  ritual  religion 
22 days ago
The Onion -- Parents Of Crying Child Must Not Be Any Good
'At press time, sources confirmed another child just a few feet away from the bawling infant was not crying, and was therefore being raised by good parents who loved her.'
TheOnion  parenting  narcissism  satire 
22 days ago
Zhwazi comments on Market Anarchists, where do you stand on private property?
'Markets cannot decide on property law. Markets are defined by property law. The limits of the market are the limits of property law. Things which are prohibited by a property law would be categorized as non-market. Any disagreement about property law being settled by the market would be claimed to be a non-market issue by one or the other party. You would have no standing to tell a slave trader that he was wrong, as from his perspective, your freeing a slave of his is theft. Who is right? Is this settled by market processes? Because property doesn't have legal standing and it'd be possible to just make all the vocal anti-slavery people slaves to establish a dominant marketplace norm of property. -- Property does not come from the market. Property comes before the market. Once property is established, then you can have a market. Saying "Let the market decide" is equivalent to saying "Let aggression decide", because you haven't determined yet at that point which interactions are free, and thus market and which interactions are violent, and thus aggression.'
markets  property  law 
22 days ago
Breitbart -- Making the Trolls Pay: How One UK Company Made £1 Million in Four Days from Furious Social Justice Warriors
'Something subtle, yet powerful is happening in the ultra fast-moving, consumer-savvy world of internet-era marketing. In fact, it’s an idea so new, none of the marketing gurus I approached while writing this piece had even really thought about it. -- It’s the joyous concept of turning furious Social Justice Warriors to your advantage – and harnessing their rage to make you piles of beautiful dosh.'
illiberalism  politicalcorrectness  thoughtpolice  blowback  streisandeffect 
22 days ago
YouTube -- GenomeTV - Ted Dinan: Microbiome, Brain and Behavior
http://www.genome.gov/Multimedia/Slides/HumanMicrobiomeScience2013/33_Dinan.pdf -- 'What neurotransmitters can be produced by microbes? #Norepinephrine: Escherichia, Bacillus, and Saccharomyces; #Serotonin: Streptococcus, Escherichia, and Enterococcus; #Dopamine: Bacillus and Serratia'
psychology  brain  bacteria  health 
25 days ago
Managing with the Brain in Mind by David Rock (PDF)
'As humans, we are constantly assessing how social encounters either enhance or diminish our status. Research published by Hidehiko Takahashi et al. in 2009 shows that when people realize that they might compare unfavorably to someone else, the threat response kicks in, releasing cortisol and other stress-related hormones. (Cortisol is an accurate biological marker of the threat response; within the brain, feelings of low status provoke the kind of cortisol elevation associated with sleep deprivation and chronic anxiety.)' -- 'Uncertainty registers (in a part of the brain called the anterior cingulate cortex) as an error, gap, or tension: something that must be corrected before one can feel comfortable again. That is why people crave certainty. Not knowing what will happen next can be profoundly debilitating because it requires extra neural energy. This diminishes memory, undermines performance, and disengages people from the present. Of course, uncertainty is not necessarily debilitating. Mild uncertainty attracts interest and attention: New and challenging situations create a mild threat response, increasing levels of adrenalin and dopamine just enough to spark curiosity and energize people to solve problems. Moreover, different people respond to uncertainty in the world around them in different ways, depending in part on their existing patterns of thought...All of life is uncertain; it is the perception of too much uncertainty that undercuts focus and performance. When perceived uncertainty gets out of hand, people panic and make bad decisions.' -- '...One critical thread of research on the social brain starts with the “threat and reward” response, a neurological mechanism that governs a great deal of human behavior. When you encounter something unexpected — a shadow seen from the corner of your eye or a new colleague moving into the office next door — the limbic system (a relatively primitive part of the brain, common to many animals) is aroused. Neuroscientist Evian Gordon refers to this as the “minimize danger, maximize reward” response; he calls it “the fundamental organizing principle of the brain.” Neurons are activated and hormones are released as you seek to learn whether this new entity represents a chance for reward or a potential danger. If the perception is danger, then the response becomes a pure threat response — also known as the fight or flight response, the avoid response, and, in its extreme form, the amygdala hijack, named for a part of the limbic system that can be aroused rapidly and in an emotionally overwhelming way. -- Recently, researchers have documented that the threat response is often triggered in social situations, and it tends to be more intense and longer-lasting than the reward response. Data gathered through measures of brain activity — by using fMRI and electroencephalograph (EEG) machines or by gauging hormonal secretions — suggests that the same neural responses that drive us toward food or away from predators are triggered by our perception of the way we are treated by other people. These findings are reframing the prevailing view of the role that social drivers play in influencing how humans behave. Matthew Lieberman notes that Abraham Maslow’s “hierarchy of needs” theory may have been wrong in this respect. Maslow proposed that humans tend to satisfy their needs in sequence, starting with physical survival and moving up the ladder toward self-actualization at the top. In this hierarchy, social needs sit in the middle. But many studies now show that the brain equates social needs with survival; for example, being hungry and being ostracized activate similar neural responses. -- The threat response is both mentally taxing and deadly to the productivity of a person — or of an organization. Because this response uses up oxygen and glucose from the blood, they are diverted from other parts of the brain, including the working memory function, which processes new information and ideas. This impairs analytic thinking, creative insight, and problem solving; in other words, just when people most need their sophisticated mental capabilities, the brain’s internal resources are taken away from them. -- Studies by Steven Maier at the University of Boulder show that the degree of control available to an animal confronted by stressful situations determines whether or not that stressor undermines the ability to function. Similarly, in an organization, as long as people feel they can execute their own decisions without much oversight, stress remains under control. Because human brains evolved in response to stressors over thousands of years, they are constantly attuned, usually at a subconscious level, to the ways in which social encounters threaten or support the capacity for choice. -- A perception of reduced autonomy — for example, because of being micromanaged — can easily generate a threat response. When an employee experiences a lack of control, or agency, his or her perception of uncertainty is also aroused, further raising stress levels. By contrast, the perception of greater autonomy increases the feeling of certainty and reduces stress. -- If you are a leader, every action you take and every decision you make either supports or undermines the perceived levels of status, certainty, autonomy, relatedness, and fairness in your enterprise. In fact, this is why leading is so difficult. Your every word and glance is freighted with social meaning. Your sentences and gestures are noticed and interpreted, magnified and combed for meanings you may never have intended. -- When a leader is self-aware, it gives others a feeling of safety even in uncertain environments. It makes it easier for employees to focus on their work, which leads to improved performance. The same principle is evident in other groups of mammals, where a skilled pack leader keeps members at peace so they can perform their functions. A self-aware leader modulates his or her behavior to alleviate organizational stress and creates an environment in which motivation and creativity flourish. One great advantage of neuroscience is that it provides hard data to vouch for the efficacy and value of so-called soft skills. It also shows the danger of being a hard-charging leader whose best efforts to move people along also set up a threat response that puts others on guard. Similarly, many leaders try to repress their emotions in order to enhance their leadership presence, but this only confuses people and undermines morale. Experiments by Kevin Ochsner and James Gross show that when someone tries not to let other people see what he or she is feeling, the other party tends to experience a threat response. That’s why being spontaneous is key to creating an authentic leadership presence. This approach is likely to minimize status threats, increase certainty, and create a sense of relatedness and fairness.'
psychology  brain  stress  control  cortisol  serotonin  creativity  flow  managment  leadership  work  status  ADHD  maslow 
28 days ago
Psychology Today -- Status: A More Accurate Way of Understanding Self-Esteem by David Rock
'...Status explains why people feel good meeting someone worse off than themselves, the German concept of "Schadenfreude", with a study showing that reward circuits activate in this situation. Status even explains why people love to win arguments, even pointless ones. Status explains a tremendous number of strange occurances in life. -- Status is relative, and a sense of reward from an increase in status can come anytime you feel "better than" another person. Your brain maintains complex maps for the "pecking order" of the people surrounding you. These maps have a similar structure to how you think about numbers (link is external). Studies show that you create a representation of your own and someone else's status in the brain when you communicate, which influences how you interact with others. -- When you meet someone new and size up your relative importance, you might do so based on who is older, richer, stronger, smarter, or funnier. (Or if you live in some Pacific Islands, based on who weighs more.) Whatever framework you think is important, when your perceived sense of status goes up, or down, an intense emotional response results. As a result, people go to tremendous extremes to increase or protect their status. It operates at an individual and group level, and even at the level of countries. The desire to increase status is behind many of society's greatest achievements and some our darker hours of destruction. -- Status is rewarding not just when you have achieved high status, but also anytime you feel like your status has increased, even in a small way. One study showed that saying to kids "good job" in a monotonous recorded voice activated the reward circuitry in kids as much as a financial windfall. Even little status increases, like beating someone at a card game, feel great. We're wired to feel rewarded by just about any incremental increase in status. Many of the world's great narratives (and some of our not so great television franchises) have status at their core, based on two recurring themes. These stories involve either ordinary people doing extraordinary things (giving you hope you could have higher status one day) or extraordinary people doing ordinary things (giving you hope that even though may be ordinary, you are basically the same as people with high status.) Even an increase in hope that your status might go up one day seems to pack a reward. -- You can elevate your status by finding a way to feel smarter / funnier / healthier / richer / more righteous / more organized / fitter / stronger or by beating other people at just about anything at all. The key is to find a "niche" where you feel you are "above" others. -- #Getting a status-rush without harming others' status: There's only one good (non-pharmaceutical) answer that I can find so far. It involves the idea of "playing against yourself." Why does improving your golf handicap feel so good? Because you raise your status against someone else, someone you know well. That someone is your former self. "Your sense of self comes online around the same time in life when you have sense of others. They are two sides of same coin," Marco Iacoboni explains. Thinking about yourself and thinking about others use the same circuits (link is external). You can harness the power of the thrill of "beating the other guy" by making that other guy (or girl) you, without hurting anyone in the process. To play against yourself gives you the chance to feel ever-increasing status, without threatening others. I have a hunch that many successful people have worked all this out and play against themselves a lot.'
psychology  serotonin  status  selfesteem  infinitegame  schadenfreude  * 
28 days ago
Revisiting "Do We Ever Really Get Out of Anarchy?" by Alfred G. Cuzán (PDF)
'Natural anarchy is absence of government, i.e., a stateless society, whereas political anarchy denotes absence of a governing person or body of persons within government. The former describes what Hobbes, Locke, and Rousseau all took to be “the state of nature.” To demonstrate that the latter is a feature of all polities, and to explore its implications, is the purpose of this essay. -- ...a moment’s thought makes it clear that those who share in the exercise of political authority are themselves lacking in precisely that feature. In making, interpreting, adjudicating and enforcing, i.e., in the practice of politics, office holders have no one to appeal to who at once legislates, judges, and compels obedience on them. To the ancient question, “Quis custodiet ipsos custodies?” the answer is, “no one but themselves.” Lacking a third party to control them, those who constitute the government are self-regulating. In other words, they operate in what I have called a political anarchy. -- ... In sum, government does not abolish anarchy; it only reduces its domain, at the limit to a single man, the autocrat. Under a legitimate government, everyone in his private capacity, including those who staff the government, is subject to the civil and criminal law. However, those occupying positions of authority, which in a democracy includes the electorate, as it is they who decide who the legislators will be, engage in politics without reference to a third party, i.e., a governing man or body with the authority and the power to enforce judgments on them all. Regardless of whether sovereignty is divided, as in a separation of powers framework, or monopolized by an autocrat, those who exercise it remain in anarchy among themselves and relative to the people whom they govern, who in turn remain in anarchy vis-à-vis their governors.' -- Gods of the gapes
philosophy  statism  anarchism 
29 days ago
YouTube -- HoneyBadgerRadio: Banned for not Damselling
"A philosopher only has to make friends with the truth." ~ Aristotle
agencyvspatiency  thoughtcrime  thoughtpolice 
5 weeks ago
YouTube -- HoneyBadgerRadio: Tropes vs Gamers pt 1: Microtransactrions and the Damsel
"Men will pay a lot of money to feel like their actions have consequence – for example, hitting a patron donate button in order to save a damsel from 'mean' tweets." -- You're hurting me! Because... a man's natural protective instinct.
men  women  feminism  victimhood  predation  agencyvspatiency 
5 weeks ago
Evolution Counseling -- Groups
'...The group is a natural choice for the immortality project because it can survive indefinitely. The hope is that having made an important contribution to it or at least having been a part of it will mean that they will live on within its cultural fabric long after they are gone. -- This is probably why people resist with uncommon intensity the disbanding of any group with which they identify. It’s not just the group’s survival on the line. At the unconscious level it’s their own survival on the line. The death of the group is their death too, the stamping out of their symbolic existence. -- This is probably also why people are so blind to the detrimental aspects of the groups to which they belong. The fact that membership combats existential isolation and mortality blots out awareness of the negatives, causing members to gloss over, rationalize, or flat out deny problems that are blatantly obvious to outside observers. For most people too much is at stake to risk becoming aware of information that could cause the group’s demise and with it their own demise, so they continue to give their full and unquestioning support.'
psychology  existentialism  groups  cults  ideology  immortality  OttoRank 
5 weeks ago
The Progress Report -- Deflation (When Prices Fall) is What You Must Fear ... They Say
'Ed. Notes: The conventional wisdom is to fear deflation. But if a falling cost of living does no harm — indeed, does your pocketbook some good — then why must we hear that constant beating of the deflation drum? My guess is that if deflation = bad then inflation must = good. They want you comfortable with inflation, since rising prices makes the few richer and the many poorer. Also (since owners use debt to swell their investments), because inflation masks how massive debt becomes. -- While the authors still say the fudgey “property” instead of the precise “land” (manmade buildings mostly depreciate, nature-made locations mostly appreciate), at least they do see the crucial role that immovable, non-exandable land plays. -- Anyone who pays closer attention to land — and tracks the 18-yr land-price cycle — can do quite well investing, whether the economy is booming or busting. Any society that shares the value of land can feast, too; it can quit taxing and subsidizing and thoroughly enjoy widespread and enduring prosperity. -- If society were to recover the value of locations (something the presence of society generates), then speculators would quit buying and driving up the prices of land and resources. Prices would fall. People would not have to borrow to own land. Debt would shrivel. Deflation would become the full-time norm. -- And shrinkage of the workweek would follow. Economies would serve us instead of us them. So don’t let the inflationists strike fear in you!'
economics  geoism  land  rentseeking  malspeculation  businesscycle  landcycle  inflation  deflation  biflation 
5 weeks ago
The Progress Report -- Austrian Economics Explained by Fred Foldvary
'Austrian economics recognizes land as a factor distinct from labor and capital goods, as land is a non-produced factor of infinite duration. Austrian analyses of land have been collected in the book, The Spatial Market Process, volume 16 (2012) in the book series, Advances in Austrian Economics. My chapter, “An Austrian Theory of Spatial Land,” analyzes the role of land in the Austrian theory of the business cycle. Just as an artificial reduction in interest rates by governmental intervention generates unsustainable investments in buildings, which Austrians call “malinvestments,” cheap credit also induces “malspeculation” in land value. Economic growth gets choked by both interest rates that have risen back up and by unsustainable high prices for land. The Georgist theory of the business cycle, which emphasizes land, and the Austrian theory that emphasizes money, interest, and capital goods, are complimentary, and their integration provides a more complete Austrian theory of economic cycles. -- The complementarity of Austrian and Georgist thought has been recognized by some Austrian economists such as Leland Yeager, and by some Georgist economists such as Mason Gaffney, but some Austrian economists have let their anarchist ideology dominate their economic thinking, and so they mistakenly reject the public collection of land rent as statist intervention. In evaluating Austrian theory, as with any theory, we need to separate the pure economic logic of the school of thought from the individual doctrines of some individuals who identify with a school of thought.'
economics  austrianschool  land  geoism  FredFoldvary 
5 weeks ago
The Onion -- Lovestruck Arabian Princess Begs Father To Spare John Kerry’s Life
'“He is a good man, a kind man, and he is the one I have chosen. He wants only to love me, Father. If you kill him then you will kill me too, for our hearts are forever entwined.”'
TheOnion  america  empire  petrodollar  satire 
5 weeks ago
Evolution Counseling -- Neurosis And Death Anxiety
'“Neurosis is the way of avoiding nonbeing by avoiding being.” ~ Paul Tillich -- Unconsciously, neurotics set up their lives to protect that wavering, flickering candle deep down inside that represents who they really are, a Self that was subject to a hostile and threatening environment in childhood. By avoiding being in the world as they are they avoid having this being obliterated, in the symbolic and in the real sense of the word. -- But of course the tragic truth is that the plan backfires. If you don’t have the courage to become who you really are then that lack of courage becomes your choice, your destiny, a destiny even worse than death because that person, the person who is potentially and really you, never gets the chance to live at all.' -- Avoidance of a void.
psychology  childhood  attachment  schizoid 
6 weeks ago
Evolution Counseling -- Less Than You Are Capable Of Being
'“If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life.” ~ Abraham Maslow -- If you’re walking a path that seems to be helping you become what you’re capable of being, this path is going to be difficult, there’s going to be more stress and tension than if you were selling yourself short. But you’ll accept the stressors and tension as necessary evils, even embrace them, since they’re proof that you’re on the right track, they’re side-effects of your forward progress. -- Anything less than you are capable of being is not good enough, even if no one else sees it, even if your path is one of fame and acclaim. When it comes to your self-actualization you are the only one who can judge whether or not it has occurred. If it hasn’t there is no reason to expect any other outcome than unhappiness.' -- "I think you unhappy because you never have been unhappy: you have passed through your life without meeting an antagonist: no one will know your powers, not even you yourself. For a man cannot know himself without a trial: no one ever learnt what he could do without putting himself to the test..." ~ Seneca
psychology  authenticity  individuation  optimalfrustration  stoicism 
6 weeks ago
The Rational Male -- Admiration & Respect
Comment: Sun Wukong: Patrice O'Neal - How would you keep your man? https://youtu.be/0jnUU2c_i0w
men  women  appreciation 
6 weeks ago
The Washington Post -- I’m a single mother by choice. One parent can be better than two.
'My preparation for single motherhood began when I was a child. I started saving money for a baby when I was 14. I stowed away children’s books, sentimental toys and baby clothes I once wore or bought on clearance or from thrift stores. My magazine subscriptions were to Seventeen and Babytalk. While my friends yearned to find the right man to marry someday, I fantasized about finding lost babies in the woods or adopting a child as soon as I turned 18 (the youngest age allowed in Massachusetts).' -- My precious. / The One Good Parent. / Wounded people wound people; some wounded people create people to wound. / Isolation is the precursor to abuse.
women  predation  power  trauma  repetitioncompulsion 
6 weeks ago
typhonblue comments on Why are misandric articles so popular among women?
'Empathy is a positive trait people develop by recognizing that they don't necessarily have it innately. We think that women have it innately... the result is that women as a group don't develop their empathy.'
men  women  empathy  bellyfeel  delusion 
6 weeks ago
Thought Catalogue -- 5 Reasons Every Woman Should Marry And 1 Reason She Might Not Janet Bloomfield
'My recent article on why men should not marry attracted a lot of female commenters who scoffed at the idea that women would ever abuse the powers legal marriage gives them over men. I thought I would flip the genders just to demonstrate to the skeptical exactly how women might, can, and do approach marriage. If this doesn’t convince you of how vulnerable men are, I don’t know what will. -- #1. He’ll be considered your personal property; #2. You can control him via sex; #3. Take away his space; #4. Divorce will set you up financially; #5. You’ll keep your family -- All things considered, marriage is a sweet deal for women. A grown adult woman can never work a day in her life if she knows how to use her uterus, and the law, to her advantage. Get a man to marry you. His shit is yours. Have kids with another man and grab both for support. 70% of young American men are unmarried? Gee, I wonder why? This is why women need feminism. Men fighting back against draconian marital laws by refusing to marry at all? That’s misogyny.' -- Woman up!
men  women  marriage  predation 
6 weeks ago
Ribbonfarm -- The Essence of Peopling by Sarah Perry
'...Rochat, in contrast, models human cognition as fundamentally social in nature. Each person learns to be aware of himself – is constrained toward self-consciousness – by other people being aware of him. He learns to manage his image in the minds of others, and finds himself reflected, as in a mirror, through the interface of language and non-verbal communication. -- This structure hints at infinite recursion, but cognitive resources are limited, and in practice only the first couple of levels of mutual simulation are salient. Thomas Nagel finds this structure at the heart of “non-perverse” sexual desire in his 1969 paper on sexual perversion: "Sexual desire involves a kind of perception, but not merely a single perception of its object, for in the paradigm case of mutual desire there is a complex system of superimposed mutual perceptions – not only perceptions of the sexual object, but perceptions of oneself. Moreover, sexual awareness of another involves considerable self-awareness to begin with – more than is involved in ordinary sensory perception." -- The self is not unitary and separate from others; peopling occurs in the context of mutual-mental-modeling relationships, which continue to affect each person when he is alone.'
psychology  self  mentalizing 
6 weeks ago
Dr. Jonice Webb -- Childhood Emotional Neglect: For Therapists
'Childhood Emotional Neglect: A parent’s failure to respond enough to a child’s emotional needs. -- Childhood Emotional Neglect is invisible, intangible, and unmemorable. It’s not something that a parent does to a child. Instead, it’s something that a parent fails to do for a child. Since it’s not an act, but a parent’s failure to act, it’s not noted or remembered by parent, child or onlooker. Yet it has a profound effect upon how that child will feel and function as an adult. -- How do we help our clients become aware of the full impact of what didn’t happen for them?'
psychology  attachment  neglect 
6 weeks ago
Dr. Jonice Webb -- What Didn’t Happen
'As a psychologist, I have seen time and time again that these subtle parental failures in childhood leave the adult with a feeling of being incomplete, empty, unfulfilled, or even questioning the purpose and value of his own life. -- This becomes even more difficult when the emotionally neglected adult looks back to her childhood for an explanation for why she feels this way. I have heard many emotionally neglected people say, “I had a lovely childhood. I wasn’t mistreated or abused. My parents loved me, and provided me with a nice home, clothing and food. If I’m not happy, it’s my own fault. I have no excuse.” -- These people can’t remember what didn’t happen in their childhoods. So as adults, they blame themselves for whatever is wrong in their lives. They have no memory of what went wrong for them, so they have no way of seeing it or overcoming it, to make their lives happier. -- In addition to self-blame, another unfortunate aspect of Emotional Neglect is that it’s self-propagating. Emotionally neglected children grow up with a blind spot about emotions, their own as well as those of others. When they become parents themselves, they’re unaware of the emotions of their own children, and they raise their children to have the same blind spot. And so on and so on and so on, through generation after generation. -- My goal is to make people aware of this subtle but powerful factor. To give everyone the ability to look back and see the invisible; have the words to talk about it, and an opportunity to correct it and stop blaming themselves.'
psychology  attachment  childhood  neglect  abuse  parenting 
6 weeks ago
Dr. Jonice Webb -- What Do You Wish Your Parents had Said to You?
'Why did I ask this particular question? Because in my experience as a psychologist, I have found that people are naturally far more able to describe what they wish their parents hadn’t done or said to them than what they wish their parents had done or said to them. This distinction is also a fair description of the difference between abuse and neglect. Abuse is an action, whereas neglect is a lack of action. Our brains record and remember things that happened (like abuse), whereas our brains do not notice things that don’t happen (neglect). -- Which seems worse: a parent who screams and yells at a child and calls him names? Or a parent who simply does not talk to or engage the child at all? -- I have seen that failure to engage, notice and affirm a child does just as much damage to him or her as abuse, but the effects are different. An abused child will feel “hit,” verbally, physically or emotionally; whereas a neglected child will feel simply “at sea,” invalid and alone. I see Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) as one of the greatest potential threats to future generations. It is difficult to stop something that is invisible, intangible, unnoticeable and unmemorable. -- The subtlety of CEN gives it extra power. Many adults who grew up with an absence of emotionally attentive observations and questions like those listed above do not recognize the damage that this absence has done them. And even when they recognize it, they can’t quite believe or grasp it. People with CEN vastly underestimate its effects upon them. CEN is, by definition, nothing. How can nothing be something? How can nothing be a source of enduring pain and struggle?'
psychology  attachment  childhood  neglect  abuse  parenting 
6 weeks ago
YouTube -- Honey Badger Radio: Censorship
Hannah on the 'Ban Bossy' campaign: "Well, they don't understand the difference between leadership and being bossy. That's the problem. That's why they complain about getting called bossy because they don't see what's wrong with it. They don't see that's not leadership, that's just throwing your weight around." -- Karen/GirlWritesWhat: "What gets me is they have no capacity to even examine the parallel male experience because boys didn't get called 'bossy,' they got called 'bullies' when they behaved that way." -- Hannah: "They don't want to examine the male experience, they don't want to admit that what happens that they're complaining about is not unique to them because then they can't play the victim. You're not a victim if everybody else had the same thing happen that happened to you. That's why you see feminists working so hard to shut out discussion about male experiences and to censor that."
feminism  victimhood  ideology  thoughtpolice  censorship 
7 weeks ago
The Art of Manliness -- How to Manage Depression
'So you’ve developed greater strength and self-understanding…for what purpose? If it’s just an effort to make yourself feel better, happiness — in the form of flourishing — will elude you. -- At the end of the day, the greatest antidote to depression is having a greater purpose — a reason to get out of bed when you don’t feel like it, a reason to get better and become stronger, a reason to live. Men who have not only suffered from depression, but used it to drive their life’s work, understood this.'
psychology  depression  purpose 
7 weeks ago
Stan Tatkin -- Our Automatic Brain: Everything New Will Soon Be Old
'...The automatic brain is made up of old memories, some of which are explicit, but most of which are implicit, or outside our awareness. This is called procedural memory. We know it because everything we have learned—riding a bicycle, driving a car, dancing a routine—has become something our body knows. -- Imagine you and I are on our first date. We are both excited by this new creature before us (assuming we are interested in each other, of course). Our aliveness is apparent, and our attention is focused intensely on each other’s face, body, smell, touch, and maybe even taste. You and I want to know everything about the other. We are fully present, and wonderful neurochemicals are coursing through our blood, brain, and body, much like cocaine. That is nature’s love potion working on us. Delicious, isn’t it? Would you like to have a bit more? -- But I have good and bad news for you. First the bad first. The beautiful, fascinating, mysterious new thing that you are will be automated by my brain very soon. And your brain will automate me soon, too. When that happens, we will become familiar, and our novelty-seeking brains will no longer pay each other so much attention. Instead, we will draw from our vast reservoir of memories and experiences to do our daily business. -- What is potentially bad news about this is that we think we know each other, but we don’t really. So we will make mistakes. We’ll operate from memory, which does not require presence, attention, error correction, and the other fancy things our brain does when faced with newness. For example, my brain will automatically see you as if you were my ex-wife or my mother or my father, and base its reactions on those memories. -- Oh! I almost forgot: the good news. Due to the automatic brain, our relationship will seem easier, more comfortable, and more familiar. Probably the best news is that automation does not have to become a problem. This is because the antidote to automation is presence and attention to detail. By that I mean that you become habituated to attending to the details of your partner’s face, voice, body, movements, and words and phrases. When you are together, stay present in your body and don’t wander off into your own thoughts, your cell phone, and or other potential partners across the room. Keep your eyes on the ball—and that ball is your partner. Pay attention as if you’ve never seen or heard him or her before.'
psychology  relationships  securityvsnovelty  control  StanTatkin 
7 weeks ago
Personality Type in Depth -- The Animus and Transformative Grief
'...Stone seems reluctant to engage in this conversation. Perhaps this is because, as an INTP, she finds “small talk” stressful (McAlpine et al., 2009). Finally, after some cajoling, she reports that her evening routine back home involved tuning in to the radio and driving. When asked what kind of radio, Stone replies that it doesn’t matter as long as “they don’t talk and I don’t have to think.” -- This response is both typical of dominant introverted thinking types, who tend to dislike “talk,” while also surprising, since Ti types normally like to think. Upon further prodding, Stone reveals the story of her daughter’s death. She received the news of her death while driving, “and ever since, that’s what I do. I wake up, I go to work and then I just drive.” One possible theory for this reaction is that Stone’s Ti is “worn out” (von Franz, 1971/2013, p. 21) due to its inability to make sense of what happened. There is no logic to this tragedy, no fairness, and no solution. Thus she relies increasingly on her Ne (through her research) and her Si (in third, Puella Aeterna position) to keep her going. Si in this position “finds tremendous difficulty in ‘letting go’ of people, places, and things” and “may hold on to traditions like a security blanket” (McAlpine et al., 2009). Sadly, it appears that just as a Puella wants to remain an eternal child, Stone wants to remain frozen in this early phase of grief. Or, perhaps it is not that she wants to remain here, but rather she does not know of a way forward. Another reason for this lack of development may be that introverted feeling (Fi) falls in the eighth position of Beebe’s INTP model. The Demon/Daimon archetype associated with this position makes it especially difficult for INTPs to connect with intense emotion, such as grief. However, it appears that by confessing her reality to Kowalsky, something is stirred within Stone and we see deep feeling begin to awaken within her. -- ... -- Von Franz states that “touching the inferior function resembles an inner breakdown at a certain crucial point in one’s life.” However, “if someone has really gone through this transformation,” she can Earth during translunar injection-300xthen access the appropriate functions for each situation, no longer possessed by the dominant function (1971/2013, p. 73-74). Introverted thinking, as the dominant function, was not capable of coping with Stone’s grief. She fell into a deteriorated introverted sensate position in order to stay alive, but she became stuck there. “One has to suffer defeat in order to develop further (p. 68),” however, and indeed it was a series of defeats that brought Stone into contact with her saving grace, her inferior extraverted feeling. -- James Hillman asserted that, “Self-realization is a process of feeling-realization, realizing what we feel, feeling what we are” (1971/2013, p. 102). In this case, Stone’s Animus extraverted feeling, the “divine fool” (p. 10) acts as an inner guide that helps her feel out her shadow functions and feel anew her conscious ones. By martyring himself so that Stone could live, Kowalsky as Animus image proved to be the “ever-bleeding wound of the conscious personality” (Von Franz, 1971/2013, p. 68). And yet, by re-emerging through the unconscious, he allowed for an enlargement of Stone’s consciousness. Through this inner (and outer) process of death and rebirth, a new attitude was born. Paralyzing grief became transformative grief.'
psychology  personality  INTP 
7 weeks ago
YouTube -- Honey Badger Radio: Feminist Mad Science
Karen/GirlWritesWhat @ 02:18:00: "...a lot of these authors who chose to almost entirely write male-on-male erotica – these are women authors – they said that male-on-male erotica gave them the ability to explore female sexual agency through male characters. This always blew me away. It just blew me away. Like, how can you explore female sexual agency through a male character? Because a man is not a woman, and a man's experience is not a woman's experience – and the perceptions of a man are not going to be the perceptions of a woman. And a man's sexual power is nothing like a woman's sexual power. So how the fuck are you going to tell me you're exploring female sexual agency through two male characters? That's completely fucking fucked up. But a lot of these women have been convinced that they have no sexual agency, when in reality, they have way more sexual agency than men. Absolutely way more because part of having agency is have the wherewithal to act and to get what you want, aAnd when it comes to getting sex – in any context other than maybe Mick Jagger vs that chick who works in 7-Eleven – a woman is going to have more agency, sexually, more wherewithal to get the sex that she wants when she wants it, than any man. What we have here is an obstruction in women's perception of themselves. It has nothing to do with reality; it has absolutely nothing to do with women's ability to get the sex that they want when they want it – to take responsibility for their own sexual experience, good or bad, to embrace their sexuality – it has nothing to do with that, it's a learned helplessness...Women have way more sexual agency than men do – way more – and they just don't fucking know it, and they're not willing to accept it, and they're not willing to embrace it, and they're not willing to use it responsibly. Which means that they are not willing to take the position of a moral agent in their own sex lives..."
men  women  sexuality  agencyvspatiency 
7 weeks ago
YouTube -- Badgerpod Nerdcast 30: Chick Flick Schtick
Alison/TyphonBlue @ 01:32:00: "If you basically learn that your only worth is in what you can compel men to do in the context of holding your sexuality and companionship out as a carrot then of course you're going to create these elaborate and ridiculous obstacle courses that men have to jump through because that's how you feel a sense of self-worth; you can't manufacture it in any other way because you're told over and over and over again that you have no agency and that you're a victim of 'patriarchy' of 'rape culture' of 'male privilege' – you're a victim, you're a victim, you're a victim – you have nothing personal that you can contribute to the world or develop in and of yourself because it's all completely subordinate to the great power of men (and that's basically feminism in a nutshell) – and you're told that your whole life, and, again, the only thing that you get [to have] a personal sense of efficacy or sense of having a mark on the world is what you can compel men to do in the context of winning you as a companion. So when women put up these ridiculous and emotional and completely self-contradictory obstacle courses, they're really just saying: 'My God, I'm totally worthless; I have absolutely nothing of myself and thus I have to pour all of my sense of worth into forcing you to do shit." -- Hannah: "It goes back to the thing I keep saying about how we teach our kids to value themselves, where we teach girls their value is in how other people respond to them, and boys that their value is in what they do for other people. And it sounds to me that this movie is just designed to reinforce that belief that to earn a relationship with a woman, a man should shape everything about himself around her interests..."
men  women  agencyvspatiency  sacrifice  culture 
7 weeks ago
Soc Cogn Affect Neurosci (2015) -- Intranasal administration of oxytocin increases compassion toward women
'It has been suggested that the degree of compassion—the feeling of warmth, understanding and kindness that motivates the desire to help others, is modulated by observers’ views regarding the target’s vulnerability and suffering. This study tested the hypothesis that as compassion developed to protect vulnerable kinships, hormones such as oxytocin, which have been suggested as playing a key role in ‘tend-and-befriend’ behaviors among women, will enhance compassion toward women but not toward men. ... -- The results showed that in women and men participants oxytocin enhanced compassion toward women, but did not affect compassion toward men. These findings indicate that the oxytocinergic system differentially mediates compassion toward women and toward men, emphasizing an evolutionary perspective that views compassion as a caregiving behavior designed to help vulnerable individuals.'
men  women  psychology  oxytocin  agencyvspatiency 
7 weeks ago
Buzzfeed -- 5 Things Women Do Better Than Men by Janet Bloomfield
'#1. Beat up children. According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, women are more likely to abuse children than men. In Australia, “mothers carried out almost 68 per cent of cases of emotional and psychological abuse committed by parents, about 53 per cent of physical abuse and more than 94 per cent of neglect cases.” If you ever find yourself asking why there are so many violent people out there, you might want to start by looking at all those women beating up little children.'
women  violence  childhood  abuse  psychohistory 
7 weeks ago
Buzzfeed -- Five Stupid Clichés About Women That Are Mostly True by Janet Bloomfield
'#We can be childish, and biology is a part of it. Dudes can be childish too, no question, but remember that part about how we cry easier? Well that’s not the end of it. There’s this phenomenon in biology called “neoteny,” wherein some members of a species retain infant or adolescent traits into full adulthood. This has been found in a lot of species, and humans are no exception. Human females are more neotenous than males. That means we tend to be smaller, we’re less hairy, our skin is softer, we cry more easily, our voices are higher, and so on. So yes, we just said it: we’re more childlike in appearance. But here’s the trick: we’re still full on adults and on average we’re just as smart as you. Humans tend to have protective instincts towards women that are similar to their protective instincts toward children. This can cause sexism, but it’s a sexism that cuts both ways: sometimes it causes guys to be condescending to us when that’s totally uncalled for. On the other hand, it can work to our advantage, and if we’re being assholes we’ll manipulate your protective instincts to get you to do our bidding. This instinct to protect women who don’t deserve it or need it can trigger what some call the “white knight” impulse, and it can result in you acting stupid over a female who doesn’t deserve your protection or even your sympathy. There’s nothing much you can do about this except be aware of it, because manipulative and selfish women will use it to their advantage against you, or to get you to do their dirty work for them. Learning how not to fall for it is a good way to have healthier relationships with women, and it’ll probably stop you from enabling psychotic, dysfunctional women to get away with shit they shouldn’t.'
men  women  neoteny 
7 weeks ago
r/bitcoin -- The truth about the Bitcoin Foundation
'The lesson for all of us in Bitcoin is to never put any trust in a centralized org again that wanted to represent Bitcoin or the Core Development of Bitcoin.' -- New money templars same as the old money templars.
bitcoin  opensource  commons 
7 weeks ago
Coding Horror -- Given Enough Money, All Bugs Are Shallow
'#Money turns security into a "me" goal instead of an "us" goal. I first noticed this trend when one or two people reported minor security bugs in Discourse, and then seemed to hold out their hand, expectantly. (At least, as much as you can do something like that in email.) It felt really odd, and it made me uncomfortable. -- Am I now obligated, on top of providing a completely free open source project to the world, to pay people for contributing information about security bugs that make this open source project better? Believe me, I was very appreciative of the security bug reporting, and I sent them whatever I could, stickers, t-shirts, effusive thank you emails, callouts in the code and checkins. But open source isn't supposed to be about the money… is it?'
economics  commons  opensource 
7 weeks ago
The Progress Report -- Home is a Garage in Silicon Valley Unless You Got Bucks
'Ed. Notes: As noted above, tech-progress pumps up the cost of housing, more precisely, the value of the land underneath the housing. The smart policy that Silicon Valley — and everywhere — needs to employ is to recover those locations values (via land taxes or land dues) and then disburse the revenue to residents as a dividend, sort of like what Aspen CO does. When owners have to pay an ongoing charge, they put their sites to good use and build housing. Greater supply means lower prices. And when residents get dividends, then they have more funds for affording to stay in a desirable region. How much longer before people as smart as computer geeks discover what works for affordable housing?'
economics  land  rent 
7 weeks ago
The Progress Report -- 8 Pundits from the Guardian to Forbes on How Economies Work
'Almost all of the increase in the value of capital over Piketty’s timeline comes from land. -- People choose to work and live near each other; so the value of central locations — of land — goes up. Landlords, who are producing no more than they used to, but who were sitting on advantageous locations, reap huge benefits. -- In San Francisco, the soaring price of land, and the accompanying surge in rent, has absorbed much of the wealth created by the new tech boom. -- What we really need to do isn’t to redistribute income from corporations, but to redistribute income from land. The real weapon here is the Henry George tax, or land value tax (LVT). -- See source [http://www.bloombergview.com/articles/2015-03-27/piketty-s-three-big-mistakes-in-inequality-analysis] -- Ed. Notes: Naturally, conventional commentators give one of their own credit for this insight but readers of this site could have read this correction to Piketty’s analysis, the day after his book came out.'
economics  geoism  land  rent  "capitalism" 
7 weeks ago
The Economist -- Land-value tax: Why Henry George had a point
'Land prices mainly reflect location: farmers may till the soil, or drain it, but most increases in land’s value comes from the activity of other people. Nobody builds skyscrapers or shopping malls in the wilderness. Landowners, in other words, enjoy unearned income from the benefits bestowed by good transport links, and proximity to customers, suppliers and other businesses. -- Winston Churchill said scornfully that a landlord “contributes nothing to the process from which his own enrichment is derived.”'
economics  geoism  land  rent 
7 weeks ago
YouTube -- Honey Badger Radio: Jihadist Brides
Karen/GirlWritesWhat @ 00:13:42: "What feminism did for the LGBT community was it [gave them] a really, really easy to swallow explanation for why they were hated. With feminism, all roads lead to misogyny. So, with lesbian women it's: You're women who don't behave like women, therefore that's misogynist and misogyny. And with gay men it's: You're men who behave like women, therefore that's misogyny because people hate you because you behave like women. So they essentially define the entire problem with acceptance of people within the gay community as misogyny – and you even see this with transgender people. Trans- men don't get acceptance because they're actually women pretending to be men and that's misogyny. And trans- women don't get acceptance because they're men not acting like men...they're hated [for acting like women] and that's misogyny..."
men  women  feminism  victimhood  predation 
7 weeks ago
The Art of Manliness -- How Delaying Intimacy Can Benefit Your Relationship
'Oxytocin does indeed greatly increase during sex and peaks during climax. At the same time, another important hormone – dopamine – is surging too. But after climax, both oxytocin and dopamine quickly drop off. This drop in dopamine provides a feeling of satiety, and the two hormones affect each other; as the dopamine falls, so does your level of oxytocin. Dopamine is what drives you to do the deed, and oxytocin is what draws you to a particular person, so that when these motivators decrease post-climax, your overall desire for that person dissipates. Thus, instead of making lovers feel closer to each other, sex can actually make partners feel further apart and even discouraged and restless. -- The rise and fall of dopamine and oxytocin during and after sex can potentially make a relationship feel, if not like a roller coaster, then a little dramatic and bumpy. If, that is, a non-sexually-sourced oxytocin safety net isn’t in place first. Robertson again: “Frequent, comforting feelings are important in maintaining strong pair bonds. We only deepen our bonds when we feel safe. What keeps us feeling safe is bonding behaviors (attachment cues). The oxytocin they release relaxes our natural defensiveness (by soothing the brain’s sentry, the amygdala, and stimulating good feelings in our reward circuitry). The more dependable the flow of oxytocin via daily bonding behaviors, the easier it is to sustain a relationship. In contrast, a passionate one-night stand allows lovers’ innate defensiveness to snap back into place pretty much as soon as oxytocin drops after climax. The next day, when she doesn’t text and he doesn’t call, defensiveness naturally increases. -- Perhaps the drop-off is why pair bonders (including humans) rely on more than just climax to keep bonds strong. Pair-bonding species spend most of their “us time” engaged in non-copulatory, oxytocin-releasing (bonding) behaviors: Grooming, huddling together, tail-twining, or, in humans, comforting, soothing touch, kissing, skin-to-skin contact, eye gazing and so forth. Interestingly, pair-bonding monkey mates who engage in the most bonding behaviors have the highest oxytocin levels.” -- All of this is to say that when you have sex early on in a relationship, before you’re seeing each other every day and spending most of your time together and engaging in a whole lot of other bonding behaviors, you won’t have a strong non-sexual stream of oxytocin flowing to compensate for the hormone drop-off post-climax, which may make your relationship feel more bumpy, tense, and volatile. If, on the other hand, you wait to have sex until your non-sexual oxytocin stream is running full blast, this flow will smooth over the neurochemical ups and downs that accompany sex, so that intimacy enriches your relationship and draws you together instead of apart. -- Building a stream of oxytocin before initiating sex also provides fertile ground for creating an all-important foundation of friendship for your relationship. As Robertson mentions above, non-sexual bonding behaviors relax the defensiveness of the amygdala, creating a feeling of trust and safety with your significant other. This security provides time and space to work on the communicative and emotional side of your relationship without those aspects becoming underplayed and overwhelmed by a focus on physical intimacy. -- On a final note, whatever your personal beliefs are, I think one of the most compelling arguments to be made for delaying intimacy is the power of delayed gratification. Deciding to wait for something not only builds your discipline, self-mastery, and character, it can exponentially increase the pleasure of its eventual consummation and make it a far more deep and memorable experience. Everything is so cheap these days – in-your-face, mass-produced, common, and banal. Yet within his own sphere, each man has the power to sacralize something — to take it back from being trampled under foot and make it something more meaningful – to turn it into something that will add a richness and texture to his life rather than just another run-of-the-mill experience in a tirelessly ordinary and worn out world.'
psychology  sexuality  oxytocin  relationships  attachment  affectregulation  * 
8 weeks ago
YouTube -- Honey Badger Radio: Mailbag, news and open lines!
Karen/GirlWritesWhat: 01:35:24: "They did an experiment with little kids, kids that have not developed a sense of empathy yet, they're like three years old...And they essentially said to this kid: 'I got all these cookies, and you have two choices: First choice is, you can have two cookies and everybody else also has two cookies. Or, you can have one cookie, and nobody else gets any cookies.' And guess which one these kids picked? They chose one cookie and everybody else got no cookies. Almost overwhelmingly. And it's because getting more than the next guy means more to an underdeveloped psyche with an underdeveloped sense of empathy – an immature person – than everybody benefiting and I get to profit twice as much by being generous to everybody else...'I would rather reign in hell than serve in heaven.'"
psychology  serotonin  status 
8 weeks ago
YouTube -- HoneyBadgerRadio: BadgerPod GamerGate #7: Gamey Dickwolves Collusion
01:23:00: Alison/Typhonblue: "I would argue that we are at the precipice of a revolution in how we organize. And I think that what you're seeing in this repetition of this particular [weaponized victimhood] behaviour is that, people, in the past, had to organize based on a Threat Narrative about some exterior group. The Threat Narrative, essentially, is about who belongs to the group and who doesn't belong to the group, and the relationship to the group. And usually that's centred around morality or a set of belief systems. And throughout human history, we've organized ourselves around belief systems, we've organized ourselves around familial bonds – tribalism. But all it is is just an explanation of who belongs to the group and who doesn't. And when a group becomes big enough, it can start to allow for this toxic outrage of 'You don't belong to the group! You don't conform to the norms!' And why that happens is because when a group becomes big enough and unchallenged and has no external pressure, the internal pressure builds up, and the sense of external threat is gone so people stop cooperating according to their belief system of belonging. And they start attacking each other because that pressure of outrage can't go outward, so it goes inward. And then everything blows up. But, what we're seeing now is, with the rise of these new technologies, we're seeing a way of organizing people that totally transcends Threat Narratives. Because Threat Narratives establish intra-group altruism and ability to work together: as long as you have an enemy, you work together. But as soon as that enemy goes away, you stop working together because the in-group conflicts become too great and it explodes the group. So what we're seeing is that this Threat Narrative has become big enough and mainstream enough, that it's starting to explode the group. What I think is going to happen is that we're going to see a revolution in how we organize; we'll no longer need a Threat Narrative to organize people and get them working together – because now we have games, or the medium that games are within. And games provide a way of organizing people that requires no Threat Narrative. The game itself provides the sense of consequence, the sense of potential danger or failure that will cause altruistic behaviour within the group... We're going to move past Threat Narratives as a way of organizing people into organizing people via the structures that underlie games, game mechanics..."
psychohistory  poisoncontainer  victimhood  ideology  groups  commonenemy  thegamingofeverydaylife  infinitegame  sociology  * 
8 weeks ago
Reader Supported News -- A Family Business of Perpetual War
'Neoconservative pundit Robert Kagan and his wife, Assistant Secretary of State Victoria Nuland, run a remarkable family business: she has sparked a hot war in Ukraine and helped launch Cold War II with Russia – and he steps in to demand that Congress jack up military spending so America can meet these new security threats. -- This extraordinary husband-and-wife duo makes quite a one-two punch for the Military-Industrial Complex, an inside-outside team that creates the need for more military spending, applies political pressure to ensure higher appropriations, and watches as thankful weapons manufacturers lavish grants on like-minded hawkish Washington think tanks.' -- The best protection racket taxpayer money can buy.
america  empire  statism  mercantilism  war  perpetualwar  minipax 
8 weeks ago
The Progress Report -- Chicago Mayor Emanuel Proposes to Ax Taxes for the Poor
'Ed. Notes: Coincidentally, Chicago was the home of Homer Hoyt who did such eye-opening research on land values, how they determine the business cycle — if only his discoveries were put to good use by today’s leaders. Alas. -- It’s great that a public official recognizes the destructive power of taxes. But it stinks that he did not cite the constructive power of rent recovery. Indeed, the reason all the previous tax breaks failed to eradicate poverty is because they left out the most vital part — charging owners a rent for their locations. When they have to pay these land dues, then owners get busy and develop their lots, which generates prosperity for all. -- Hey, if the notion of paying rent to government worries you (often for good reason), then earmark all the revenue raised for a dividend to residents, similar to what Aspen CO and Singapore do. Getting the dividend while basking in prosperity will always keep the land dues affordable — and it sure would win an election for any politician!'
economics  geoism  land  rent  poverty 
8 weeks ago
The Daily Bell -- Bloomberg: More Flaws in Piketty's Book; Why Henry George's Tax May Be Best
From the Bloomberg article: 'Rognlie's third point is perhaps the most interesting. Economists combine a lot of different things into "capital," such as machines, buildings and land. Rognlie points out that almost all of the increase in the value of capital over Piketty's timeline comes from land, instead of from other forms of capital. In other words, it's landlords, not corporate overlords, who are sucking up the wealth in the economy. It's a dramatic, startling insight that was somehow overlooked before Rognlie came along.'
economics  geoism  "capitalism" 
8 weeks ago
Washington's Blog -- That Moron Who Spews Garbage and Doesn't Listen to Reason May Be a Bot
'...intentionally sowing discord and posting junk comments to push down insightful comments are common propaganda techniques.'
internet  bots  propaganda  disinformation  flood  discourse 
8 weeks ago
Evolution Counseling -- Do Not Lose Sight Of How Far You Have Come
'...Earlier on in your journey you would have been tickled pink to be in the position you are now, to have the skills and experience you have now. “I have nothing to show for it” is wrong thinking when the ‘nothing’ or ‘something’ doesn’t take into account the internal self-actualization that is hard to see but still very real. -- If you keep building on that self-actualization those external results that you have been hoping for just might fall into place. But you’ll never know if you quit. We will leave you with some motivational inspiration from Frederick Nietzsche. “In science it occurs every day and every hour that a man, immediately before the solution, remains stuck, being convinced that his efforts have been entirely in vain- like one who, in untying a noose, hesitates at the moment when it is nearest to coming loose, because at that very moment it looks most like a knot.”'
psychology  perseverance 
8 weeks ago
Psychology Today -- Unnaturally Good: The Plight of the Goody Two-Shoes by Leon F Seltzer
'...Child development research has shown that young children define themselves as good or bad on the basis of how they see themselves reflected in the eyes of their parents. Until they reach the age of 8 or so, they’re simply incapable of formulating a self-image independent of how they imagine their parents view them. Obviously, the problem with requiring such external validation is that in needing— sometimes desperately—to think positively of themselves, they feel obliged to adopt particular ways of behaving that they believe are essential to satisfy their parents’ quite possibly lofty, or unrealistic, standards for them. -- Such a deeply felt necessity can lead the child to adopt a certain inauthentic, or “fabricated,” self-portrayal—to project, or simulate, a “virtue” that inevitably twists them into a shape disharmonious with who they really are. That is, they turn themselves into badly distorted versions of what, otherwise, they’d naturally become (i.e., had they not been so "indoctrinated" by their caretakers). -- To put it a little differently, to feel they’re good enough to receive as much approbation from their caretakers as possible, they’re compelled to “handicap” both their thought processes and behavior. And the outcome? As they age, they can’t really allow themselves the freedom to evolve into their true adult self. Instead, they grow into an abnormally cultivated, outwardly virtuous, false self, while yet being plagued by nagging doubts about how good they really are—or, ultimately, who they are.'
psychology  attachment  childhood  repression  shadow  falseself 
8 weeks ago
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