Twitter
RT : I need a coeliac friendly birthday cake recipe please - something that will appeal to 13 year olds. All links to re…
from twitter
55 minutes ago
Twitter
RT : Basically all that’s sustaining about 50% of the people still on here at this point.
from twitter
2 hours ago
Twitter
RT : When we say MacDuff was "untimely ripped from his mother's womb" what we're actually saying is that the guy was jac…
from twitter
3 hours ago
Twitter
RT : wait til they hear about the GPO
from twitter
6 hours ago
Twitter
RT : [singing the TMNT theme song to myself while going grocery shopping] nor-mal hu-man interaction, nor-mal hu-man int…
from twitter
7 hours ago
Twitter
Some very complex, borderline-crazy feelings around avoiding the phrases "live at home" or "going home for [event]"…
from twitter_favs
9 hours ago
Twitter
Ach. I feel that. R was one of a handful of people I stayed on Facebook for, but there’s been plent…
from twitter
10 hours ago
Twitter
The ratio of unpaid to paid hours I do for non-profits is threatening to become unsustainable. Why not help that no…
from twitter
11 hours ago
Twitter
First time I met him (in my late teens) I thought he was the most American person I’d ever seen. He…
from twitter
11 hours ago
Twitter
RT : If you have a flat tire:

1. Pull off to side of road
2. Get out of car if safe
3. Run into the woods
4. Just stay…
from twitter
11 hours ago
Twitter
RT : Hey Twitter, I'm looking to commission a custom embroidered pillow, if you can recommend anyone, especially if they…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
RT : WB exec: (on speakerphone) so you won't let him shave it

paramount exec: im sorry henry's mustache is (shushing la…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
RT : We’ve spent the past week trying to put together a comprehensive census of every Russian misinformation actor who g…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
RT : 100% contains Space Vampires
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
I’m agog. I mean, I’m not exactly known for eschewing a chance to roll out the old ‘I’m not sad, just…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
RT : Today we find out which European city has won the European Medicines Agency (EMA).

But what a loss for the UK: 900…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
I saw a screenshot of Steven Ogg and for a brief moment thought that Seth Morris was a regular on The Walking Dead…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
Gonna start a cryptocurrency with ‘Secular Calvinism Is Wank’ embedded in its code, see if I can subliminall…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
RT : Remember a couple of years ago Mansοn got engaged to a woman who was secretly planning to display his corpse in a g…
from twitter
yesterday
Twitter
Ungrateful is the new nigger.
from twitter_favs
yesterday
Twitter
Three good questions to ask yourself before you tell someone what you think of their parenting:
1) Is there some re…
from twitter_favs
2 days ago
Twitter
To do:
✅ put the bins out
✅ hang up the washing
✅ hail from a divine feminine in flux w universe
from twitter_favs
2 days ago
Twitter
RT : quick primer on England for people who don't live here: Boots is a shop which sells medicine! and Office is a place…
from twitter
2 days ago
Twitter
RT : Left: "He's a nonce and must stand down."
Right: 'Aha, we've a photo of one of YOURS being a sex creep!'
Left: "FFS…
from twitter
3 days ago
Untitled (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88-qgHh31bw)
RT : me: we need a grown-up solution on the question of the Irish border, and soon

also me:
from twitter
3 days ago
Twitter
RT : Roger is right - our son wore a Batman costume once and is now a night-bound vigilante fighting crime on the street…
from twitter
3 days ago
Twitter
Only 37 days until my Christmas joke.
from twitter_favs
3 days ago
Twitter
oh and here's the cake story, which was for Father's Day, not his birthday, and brown not grey, which shows how goo…
from twitter_favs
3 days ago
Twitter
RT : Sort of feel like I’m repeating myself now BUT HE’S THE ACTUAL FUCKING ACTUAL FOREIGN FUCKING ACTUAL FUCKING SECRET…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : Autism doesn't make you question the use of non-binary pronouns. Being an asshole does. Don't unquestioningly print…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : Trump Privately Terrified His Sexual Assault Victims Will Someday Come Forward
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : “Depression is a choice” = “your pain is your fault”
“You can overcome this if you just try hard enough” = “Your pa…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
Cheers. I’ll be fine. Was a relatively minor one + I was sitting down and not holding a hot drink or anythin…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
Lost a day of work today after having a seizure. Chronic stress (as opposed to isolated incidents of extreme stress…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : Look, I’m not one of those “fake” engineers who only builds bridges at WORK
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : Fucking state of this.
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : Pastor Mark Burns: Today it's Judge Moore. Tomorrow it could be you.

.: It can't be me tomorrow because whe…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
I’ve always thought of the BBC as being basically neutral, with only the light right wing bias of being largely pro…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : My twitter feed is nothing but liberals telling Al Franken to resign and conservatives asking why liberals aren’t t…
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : Big fan of America trying to describe a Greggs sausage roll.
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
RT : This new G.G. Allin documentary looks AMAZING.
from twitter
4 days ago
Twitter
New crochet project. Starts with a magic circle.
from twitter_favs
5 days ago
Bulb - Get a quote
In other sensible financial news: why not switch your electric supplier to Bulb and blag us both £100?
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
My patreon page now accepts pledges to cover me doing pro bono work for non-profits and (eventually) create free ed…
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
I cannot think of a single thing this could mean that isn’t about wanking.
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
RT : It’s still Mrs. Duffy
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
RT : Even with our eyes closed, it’s good to know the public trusts BBC News more than the Sun.
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
I have literally, in the real world, seen him drape cured pork products on his body on several occasi…
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
NEXT TIME on WeWillFixYou: "I am being cyber-bullied by the people I make a podcast with. Wher…
from twitter_favs
5 days ago
Twitter
Sawbones, Dead Pilots Society, Babysitters Club Club, Bookfight, Talk The Talk, Regular Features, Cas…
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
RT : If college being free for everyone would make a college education worthless you are blatantly admitting a college e…
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
RT : I can't believe what tesco have called Mince Pies this year this PC agenda is ruining christmas
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
I accidentally called one of the young mothers where I volunteer ‘babe’ yesterday, which is surely the ad…
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
All those categorisation fiends adrift with no outlet. Get Farage naming the longest fish on kids telly o…
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
The ‘best’ thing is the nature of emojis means I don’t even know if we’re looking at the same images but…
from twitter
5 days ago
Twitter
RT : Me at uni: *basically a social democrat*

Wise old people: “That’ll change once you get a job and pay taxes in the…
from twitter
6 days ago
Untitled (https://www.youcaring.com/beckybeaton-1008390)
RT : .’s family comics are especially wonderful and heartbreaking right now, please go donate:
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
RT : If you're a creative struggling w/ your self worth: remember you ARE NOT your work.

Art is a medium for release.…
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
It is. In the living smiley, the jaw is held tight by muscle, with the bone of teh top and bottom half sk…
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
OK. This is the weirdest coincidence. 100% hand on heart truth I had that realisation yesterday eve…
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
Today I had to perform a mid-meeting smackdown of a man who wasn’t as good as me and decided to make up for it by m…
from twitter_favs
6 days ago
Twitter
I am almost always fully clothed when doing your books. That is the problem chimp guarantee and is because of CLIEN…
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
RT : Here's a great thing you can do today. Help the Beatons, spread the word, make life better.
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
RT : *sighs*

The party Hitler led wasn’t called what they actually were for the same reason you don’t use your real nam…
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
RT : Hello my friends. There is no easy way to put this out there. This is my sister Becky. Since two years ago, everyt…
from twitter
6 days ago
Twitter
RT : You can say what you want about schools in the old days, but they gave their pupils truly great metaphors for delay…
from twitter
7 days ago
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