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Enterprise FizzBuzz
FizzBuzz Enterprise Edition is a no-nonsense implementation of FizzBuzz made by serious businessmen for serious business purposes. http://www.fizzbuzz.enterprises
java  parody  satire  fizzbuzz  enterprise 
5 days ago by christianmlong
Erich Kästner: Morgen Kinder wirds nichts geben
Morgen, Kinder, wird's nichts geben!
Nur wer hat, kriegt noch geschenkt.
Mutter schenkte euch das Leben.
Das genügt, wenn man's bedenkt.
Einmal kommt auch Eure Zeit.
Morgen ist's noch nicht so w...
poem  xmas  satire  kästner  from notes
5 days ago by diaeter
Hi, I’m the Dad You Hate at the Baby Birthday Party You’re Obligated to Attend
"We do speak Spanish, but in fact, in this pueblo they actually speak a language called [A soft bristling of summer wind through saltwater reeds]. I speak a little, my wife speaks it fluently — hey, honey, remember our tour guide [The experience of waking while in a dream, only to realize you’re still dreaming]? Wasn’t he hilarious? Yes! Be right there! I’m talking to Shawn, with his son — I’m sorry, I forgot again — was it 'Cardboard Box'?"
a:Spencer-Porter  p:McSweeney's★★  d:2017.12.06  w:500  satire  children  naming  from iphone
5 days ago by bankbryan
Soundtracks for Melania Trump’s East Colonnade Christmas Decorations
"The melancholy lullaby your great grandmother used to sing to you in a language that you never learned. Vocals by your great grandmother. You turn to your companion to comment on the strangeness of this, but he is crying. You’ve never seen him cry before, and he never met your great grandmother. You wonder what he hears, but are too afraid to ask."
a:Rebecca-Turkewitz  p:McSweeney's★★  d:2017.12.04  w:500  list  satire  from iphone
6 days ago by bankbryan
The World According to Trump
"SECOND MEXICAN: Will it work? This can’t weigh more than forty or fifty pounds.
FIRST MEXICAN: The sack weighs sixty pounds.
SECOND MEXICAN: I understand now. That is the exact number of pounds required to knock someone out.
They throw the sack over the border, knock the guard unconscious, and cross into the U.S. while laughing at it, because the country is now a laughingstock."
a:Teddy-Wayne  p:McSweeney's★★  d:2017.11.30  w:500  satire  Donald-Trump  immigration  voting  Russia  from iphone
7 days ago by bankbryan
MSNBC to Cut Ties With Sam Seder After Roman Polanski Rape Joke (Exclusive)
“Internally there was disgust over the tweet,” an individual familiar with the matter tells TheWrap
MSNBC has decided not to renew its contract with contributor Sam Seder after an old tweet emerged in which Seder joked about Roman Polanski raping his daughter, TheWrap has learned.
Seder’s contract ends in February and he has no scheduled appearances between now and then, a spokesperson for MSNBC told TheWrap.
“Don’t care re Polanski, but I hope if my daughter is ever raped it is by an older truly talented man w/a great sense of mise en scene,” wrote Seder in the now deleted tweet from 2009.
An archived version can be viewed here.
news  twitter  sex  crime  satire  tv 
7 days ago by rgl7194

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