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The Onion -- Report: There Just Something Dark And Intriguing About Man With Serious Personality Disorder
'WESTFORD, MA—Admitting that she couldn’t fully describe the enigmatic allure that drew her to him, local woman Laura Saracen told reporters Wednesday there was just something dark and intriguing about 34-year-old Tyler Evans, a man with a serious personality disorder. “I can’t quite put my finger on it, but from the very beginning of our date I picked up this kind of brooding and mysterious vibe from Tyler that I was really into,” Saracen said of the man with whom she’d gone out to dinner and whose deeply unstable moods, streaks of narcissism, and almost complete lack of empathy for others would meet the criteria for several mental conditions listed in the DSM-5. “Maybe I just go for the the sort of strong, silent type, or maybe I kind of like the idea that he seems to keep so much of himself hidden. Whatever it is, it’s really attractive, and I can’t wait to spend more time with him and find out who he really is under there.” At press time, Evans’ coolly aloof demeanor throughout the pair’s second date, which stemmed from an acute inability to form emotionally healthy connections with any other human being, was completely turning Saracen on.'
TheOnion  women  hypergamy  darktriad  satire 
3 days ago by adamcrowe
Tim Hawkins – Inappropriate Wedding Songs | Best Images Collections HD For Gadget windows Mac Android
Tim Hawkins – Inappropriate Marriage Tunes I do not have any of the legal rights to Tim Hawkins or his comedy. Just a huge admirer! get pleasure from! Tim Hawkins – Inappropriate Marriage Tunes
IFTTT  WordPress  Wedding  Comedy  commercial  funny  humor  Inappropriate  Jam  parody  satire  Sketch  song  songs  spoof  Tim  Hawkins 
3 days ago by wotek
The Onion -- European Leaders: ‘We Stand Together To Say Loud And Clear: We Are Scared As Fuck And Don’t Know What To Do’
'BARCELONA, SPAIN—In a show of solidarity following the terrorist attack that left 14 dead and over 100 injured in Barcelona, Spain, European leaders stood together Friday to say loud and clear that they were scared as fuck and didn’t know what to do. “Side by side in the face of unfathomable violence, we assemble here today to say that we are united in our shared fear and our terrifying realization that we have no idea how to stop this,” said German chancellor Angela Merkel, who, flanked on both sides by other European heads of state, affirmed that terrorism freaked them the fuck out and would be eradicated from the face of the earth if they only knew how. “Today, we are not German, we are not Italian or French—we are simply people who are frightened out of their goddamn minds. And though we might not share the same tongue, utter panic sounds the same in every language.” At press time, European leaders vowed to continue hyperventilating as one.'
TheOnion  europe  conquest  sarcasticapology  satire 
3 days ago by adamcrowe
The Legend Of Zelda: BoTW Angry Review | Best Images Collections HD For Gadget windows Mac Android
The Legend of Zelda: BoTW Indignant Critique *Sorry for all the delays! Thanks for all your guidance men! This is the 7th version we’ve tried so far – Anyone needs to teach Nintendo Japan about Honest Use! I’m certain this will get claimed eventually which we will combat as considerably as we can* Music: https://www.youtube.com/observe?v=NU75uz0b8EU […]
IFTTT  WordPress  Review  angry  angryjoe  angryjoeshow  breath  of  the  wild  com  Critique  game  Gameplay  Nintendo  parody  satire  switch  legend  zelda 
5 days ago by wotek
If the media covered the US riots the same way it covers them in other countries
Actually, 80% of this article _is_ the way that other countries cover the USA.

Other than the obviously satirical bits this could have been an article in The Independent
media  journalism  satire  usa 
5 days ago by andrewducker

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