men   13729

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girlwriteswhat comments on If Men's Rights is so critical - why are there no actual MRA groups protesting on the frontlines, causing civil disobedience, really making their voices heard? Why is MRA limited to sullen bitter internet forums?
'Things like civil disobedience and protesting have a higher social (and potential legal) cost for MRAs than they did even the first feminists. Men's rights hits straight at the heart of men's gender role – to produce more than they consume, to solve their individual problems on their own as well as the problems of others, and to embody a character that embraces sacrifice and is uncomplaining about their lot. -- I believe this is a combination of a VERY old paradigm (one that exists in most species) of male disposability, and a VERY (in evolutionary terms, at least) recent paradigm of male utility to females and offspring. -- The combination of these two paradigms (male disposability and male utility) have been fundamental to getting us where we are today – large brains, complex tools, "Boost" chocolate nutritional smoothies for diabetics available at your local grocery, airplanes that not only fly but don't crash into each other, etc. -- Keep in mind, male disposability exists in most, perhaps all, species. Male utility is a different thing. -- On the other hand, part of women's role through history has been raising complaint and alarm. And justifiably so, given their role as child bearers and hands-on child carers. They evolved not merely as women, but as the mother/child dyad. (This is possibly the reason women are less heat and cold tolerant – because their babies are less heat and cold tolerant. When mom feels chilly, she knows her more vulnerable infant who is usually nearby may be feeling chilly and will do something about it.) -- Both mother and child became increasingly helpless, less mobile and vulnerable for much longer as we evolved, due to premature birth and the vagaries of dealing with a pelvis designed for walking rather than birthing. Men who attended to the real complaints and fears voiced by their mates would have had children who were more likely to survive. Men who attended to the real complaints and fears voiced by the mates of others would have had the gratitude and respect of other men. -- Protect and provide is at the heart of men's gender role. -- To protect, you must be tough. Tough guys don't complain about their own suffering as men, though it is permissible for them to complain about the suffering of others, or suffering that is not attached to their maleness but perhaps to some other aspect of their identity. -- To provide, one must produce more than you consume, and give the surplus to women and children. Productive, service oriented men don't complain that they are not given enough funding, services, help, support. -- Men who make a display of complaint about their own lot in life make most people angry and disgusted. When those complaints directly subvert the protector/provider role (such as complaining about alimony or child support, or complaining about measures that protect women from domestic abuse), it's never well received. Those types of complaints come directly into conflict with the perceived best interests of women and children, who are considered the appropriate beneficiaries of men's protector/provider gender role. -- Now remember, male disposability exists in most or all species. Disposability forms a pillar of the protector/provider role, but that role is one that ameliorates disposability. Men are the ones expected to take on this role because they are disposable, but in taking on the role they become LESS disposable. Abandoning or failing to assume the role makes them MORE disposable. -- Now imagine a group of men who are making people feel disgusted and angry because they're inconveniencing people by complaining about their own problems as men and society's responses to their failure to perform their role. Imagine these men begin engaging in civil disobedience – now they're not just disposable, they're dangerous. -- This is why the vast majority of the negative articles and blogs about the MRM contain variations of two contradictory ad hominem attacks: #don't listen to them, they're weak, pathetic losers #don't listen to them, they're scary and dangerous -- Weak, pathetic losers aren't scary or dangerous, at least, they're not generally perceived to be so. But these are the go-to insults our opponents use to stymie our efforts. And this is how a "men's march on Washington" would be viewed. Pathetic and dangerous at the same time. -- It's why women are often more successful than men at getting the message out there, why we have to take a different approach to activism than other groups in terms of tactics (like protests and rallies). It's also why we frequently have to frame things like fathers' rights in terms of children's right to their fathers. It's why, when we talk about fathers' rights, we talk more about the effects of fatherlessness on children, rather than the effects on fathers of being separated from their kids. People will care more about the former than the latter, because the latter is no longer embodying his role and is therefore fully disposable, or worse, disposable and dangerous. -- It's why when we approach the mainstream, we have to frame a LOT of men's rights issues in terms of how helping men helps women and children, or society, rather than how we should be helping men for their own sake. Convince people that men are utilities who should be cared for and maintained so they can and are willing continue to be of use, or so that they don't end up acting out in destructive ways that harm women and children, because most people will NOT be convinced to care about them just because.'
men  sacrifice  shamingtactics  * 
10 days ago by adamcrowe
girlwriteswhat comments on Guardian Misandrist Belives Only Males Have a Need for Robotic Sex and Silicon Pleasures. She Must Have Been Too Boring To Get An Invite To An Anne Summers Party
'I always found it a bit weird. Women seem perfectly happy with dildos, some of which do things no human penis does. It operates on an on/off switch and not only feels nothing, but does not simulate feeling anything. -- Not gross at all. Nor does it reduce men down to inanimate body parts. -- Men appear to be more likely to want an entire simulated woman that looks real and behaves as if she emotionally adores and sexually desires him. She is programmed to respond positively to what he does with her. -- Totally objectifying. Also, probably rape.'
men  women  sexuality 
10 days ago by adamcrowe
girlwriteswhat comments on Jordan Peterson sues Wilfrid Laurier University for defamation. $1.5 million. A very good chance he will win.
'Enforced monogamy is a pretty widely used term in social science, and it doesn't refer to governments forcing people to get married. -- It basically refers to a set of social and sometimes legal traditions, incentives and practices that incentivize monogamy and stigmatize promiscuity. -- A social tradition would be socially shaming women who have illegitimate children, or socially shaming men who get women pregnant and then refuse to "take responsibility" by marrying her. Or calling women who are promiscuous sluts or slags or women of fallen virtue, and calling men who are promiscuous cads or rakes or dogs or scoundrels, and refusing to invite any of them to a gathering of respectable people. -- Legal traditions would be things like fault divorce, which penalizes the party who was the cause of the marital breakdown. Men who abandoned their families for no good reason were held to account by the courts – stuck in legal separation supporting their wives in a separate household and unable to remarry, or punished for failing to continue to support them. Women who abandoned their families for no good reason lost their entitlement to a husband's support, and custody of their kids, and were also stuck in limbo unable to remarry. -- Incidentally, when the tender years doctrine became standard practice (which meant that women retained custody in separation or divorce, as well as the right to be maintained as head of the children's household), the divorce rate rose 15-fold over the subsequent 50 years. Not 15% – 1500%. -- During the periods these norms were in place, there were always people who didn't conform – confirmed bachelors, spinsters by choice, etc. -- Even marriages between people who had no legal or financial access to divorce found ways around it – wife selling was an interesting tradition among the peasant class. More often than not, the man putting his wife up for auction was being cheated on, and frequently it was the wife herself who pressured him into it. The understanding of the community was that the winning bid in a rigged auction would be made by the man the wife was already having an affair with. It was then understood in the colloquial sense among the entire community (if not the strictly legal one) that with the sale, the wife was now the financial responsibility of her buyer and the legal husband could no longer be held accountable for her, and restitution to the husband for being wronged had been made. -- Of course, wife-selling was a big, somewhat embarrassing public spectacle. As a man you'd only do it if you were willing to take that embarrassment on the chin, and as a woman you'd only push for it if you really really really wanted to be with that other guy, because you'd have to weather being the butt of jokes for a while. And of course, it resulted in... monogamy! Just with a different dude.'
history  men  women  marriage  divorce 
10 days ago by adamcrowe
YouTube -- Janice Fiamengo: The Fiamengo File: Episode 84: Why Can't We Hate Men
"Face it: men make us women look lazy and ungrateful and we loathe them for it...What kind of being responds to constant accusations and denigrations with decency and compassion; that makes us look vindictive and nasty – and that makes us feel vindictive and nasty. Who wouldn't hate men for that?"
men  women  envy  hate  threatnarrative  feminism  misandry  projection  psychology  * 
10 days ago by adamcrowe
SwissWave Protocol Treatment For Men in Tulsa, Oklahoma - INTERNET HAPPENS
I remember back in 2010, there was once a day under the scorching southern California sun where we all huddled around the tour van at our record label’s headquarters. It was a changing of the guard, as one of the senior artists had just got back from a nationwide tour. Several friends and myself were about to embark on a national tour of our own. It was my first tour. As the senior artist rummaged... Read more
SwissWave  Protocol  Treatment  For  Men  in  Tulsa 
12 days ago by LocalBusiness
Men's Blazers & Sport Coats in Standard & Slim Fits | Bonobos
Shop for Men's Blazers & Sport Coats in Standard & Slim Fits and get free shipping and returns. Bonobos offers better-fitting, high quality and comfortable clothing to match any occasion.
shopping  men  clothing  jacket  oddjacket 
12 days ago by emory
‘Get shredded in six weeks!’ The problem with extreme male body transformations | Life and style | The Guardian
Men’s Health magazine has transformed many men – and its own fortunes – by featuring extreme muscle makeovers. But does changing shape fast have a dark side?
men  bodyimage  fitness  MensHealth  trends  Guardian  2018 
15 days ago by inspiral
typhonblue comments on Male privilege shown here.... from r/jordanpeterson
'It makes sense if you define the poor as being given value by serving the rich. Every time a rich person gives a poor person a job, she's doing him a favour. -- Likewise every time a woman opens up an opportunity for a man(woman saver) to save her, she's doing emotional labor for him.'
men  sacrifice  gynocentrism 
16 days ago by adamcrowe
Depressionen: So äußert sich die Krankheit bei Männern - SPIEGEL ONLINE
Bei Männer äußern sich Depressionen nicht immer so wie bei Frauen. Statt sich zurückzuziehen, reagieren viele aggressiv, trinken Alkohol oder stürzen sich in die Arbeit. Häufig bleiben die Probleme unerkannt.
mental  health  depression  gender  men  Sociology  Psychology 
18 days ago by asterisk2a

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