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All This Blood and Love
We leave home and return to it. We re-create approximations of it from memory or imagination. We learn and then learn more. The way I was taught, Thanksgiving was all so simple and so lovely in its aims—food and gratitude, a feast to celebrate the bounty of the harvest. It wasn’t until much later that I learned how much more complicated it is, and the part we play in that history. It’s hard to look and necessary to look, to know ourselves and know the world, to know that a thieving took place, and a smoothing of the surface of the story. Look, and look harder, to better reckon with who we are and what we come from, and to mourn what’s been taken by violence or time.

During these feast days, dare the precipice. Look out and in, deep as you can. As you gather around a table to celebrate the bounty of the harvest, let things be messy and strange and complicated. How strange it is, to exist within, to belong, and how alienating, to be inside and outside at the same time, part of something and separate. How painful, how lucky, all this blood and love. A plate passed across space, a laugh, an easy or uneasy acknowledgment: here we are. For now, here we all are. And that is plenty.
thanksgiving  essay  family  dickinson 
yesterday by madamim
Blue, Blue Windows: On Writing And Helplessness In The Age Of Trump - The Rumpus.net
I drank a lot of milkshakes last summer, sometimes two a day. I bought them at the Shake Shack in Grand Central on my way in and out of the city to visit my father at a hospital up north. I bought them when I was hungry and when I wasn’t, when I felt empty and when I felt sick. I drank them not because I wanted them but because I thought I deserved them. My life was horrible and the milkshakes were good and even though those realms of horror and goodness had nothing at all to do with each other, in my mind, at that time, the milkshakes made things, briefly, even.

My father is helpless. On August 1, 2016, he checked into the hospital for an outpatient biopsy. They kept him overnight because his blood pressure was low. On August 2, he went into alcohol withdrawal and became delirious. Then he lost consciousness and had to be intubated. After about three weeks, he woke up, but not really. He no longer knew what year it was, or where he lived, and he’d lost the ability to walk. The doctors told us these things might come back to him, or they might not.

They didn’t.
essay  topic:grief  topic:bipolar.disorder  topic:parents  author:beth.boyle.machlan 
2 days ago by thatspotonthe_t
How to Build an Online Business - Crew
Essay series on starting an online business by Crew
essay  online-business  startup-launching 
3 days ago by cd
The myth of the male bumbler
"There's a reason for this plague of know-nothings: The bumbler's perpetual amazement exonerates him. Incompetence is less damaging than malice. And men — particularly powerful men — use that loophole like corporations use off-shore accounts. The bumbler takes one of our culture's most muscular myths — that men are clueless — and weaponizes it into an alibi.

Allow me to make a controversial proposition: Men are every bit as sneaky and calculating and venomous as women are widely suspected to be. And the bumbler — the very figure that shelters them from this ugly truth — is the best and hardest proof."
patriarchy  essay  women  feminism 
3 days ago by np
What Does a “Normal” Human Genome Look Like? | Science
So, what have our first glimpses of variation in the genomes of generally healthy people taught us? First, balancing selection, the evolutionary process that favors genetic diversification rather than the fixation of a single “best” variant, appears to play a minor role outside the immune system. Local adaptation, which accounts for variation in traits such as pigmentation, dietary specialization, and susceptibility to particular pathogens is also a second-tier player. What is on the top tier? Increasingly, the answer appears to be mutations that are “deleterious” by biochemical or standard evolutionary criteria. These mutations, as has long been appreciated, overwhelmingly make up the most abundant form of nonneutral variation in all genomes. A model for human genetic individuality is emerging in which there actually is a “wild-type” human genome—one in which most genes exist in an evolutionarily optimized form. There just are no “wild-type” humans: We each fall short of this Platonic ideal in our own distinctive ways.
article  essay  org:nat  🌞  bio  biodet  genetics  genomics  mutation  genetic-load  QTL  evolution  sapiens  survey  summary  coding-theory  enhancement  signal-noise  egalitarianism-hierarchy  selection  tradeoffs  immune  recent-selection  perturbation  nibble  ideas 
5 days ago by nhaliday
Software 2.0 – Andrej Karpathy – Medium
Neural networks are not just another classifier, they represent the beginning of a fundamental shift in how we write software. They are Software 2.0.
software  essay 
6 days ago by danmichaelo

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