author:roachpatrol   87

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Life In Plastic
This particular smuppet is sewn out of some kind of blatantly artificial orange microfiber, the nap of the plush so silky it almost feels slick. When you give it a squish the body seems more firm than his regular model, denser. Bro usually keeps his toys light, too fluffy to feel like anything but props and puppets, but this one’s pleasantly dense and heavy. You don’t think you’ll be ripping it apart as easily as the last few.

And then, of course, there’s the unusual addition of a tail.
fanwork  fandom:Homestuck  pairing:Dirk/Cronus  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:roachpatrol  quality:sunfish  extra:xeno  extra:enthusiasticConsent  Extra:Toys 
september 2016 by opalsong
Grace In Your Heart And Flowers In Your Hair
“Get out,” Karkat growls, from the top of a staircase. His voice is thick and unsteady and he reeks of that red smell, it’s pouring off him, spiking up your heartrate. Sollux takes a startled breath, then another, and crowds up against your back.

“I mean it,” Karkat snarls. “I told you guys we were through, why the fuck are you here?”
fanwork  fandom:Homestuck  pairing:Karkat/Sollux/Terezi  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:roachpatrol  quality:sunfish  extra:dubcon  Extra:SexPollen  extra:underage 
september 2016 by opalsong
With Our Arms Unbound
“You ready?” you ask, and the most important human in the galaxy sticks her tongue out at you. Several of your organs do a giddy flip. Then the knot is tied and that’s it, you’re moirails.
fanwork  fandom:Homestuck  pairing:Jade<>Feferi  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:roachpatrol  quality:sunfish  extra:PaleRomance(isthebestkind)  extra:au  extra:marriageofconvenience  extra:politics 
september 2016 by opalsong
electing strange perfections
Dave says, bouncing his heel on your thigh for attention, “Are you drunk? Holy shit, are you— like, are you tripping out? Did Rose just roofie you with her pretentious fuckin’ leaf water? Oh my god.”

“Oh my god,” Rose repeats, and colors brilliantly across her cheeks, blood coursing bright and close under her skin.
fanwork  fandom:Homestuck  pairing:Rose/Kanaya/Dave  rating:pg-13  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:roachpatrol  quality:sunfish  extra:PaleRomance(isthebestkind)  extra:dubcon  extra:drugs 
september 2016 by opalsong
The Glorious Twenty Sixth of May [Roachpatrol]
In the darkness shines a light. The dim red eye of a lit cigar hangs in the air, glints off a silver cigar case, battered armor, a watchman’s badge. A man sits in the chair behind the Patrician’s desk, badge on the wood before him, silver case turning over and over in his dirty fingers.

“You ever heard of the Trousers of Time?” he asks abruptly. His voice is rough. Everything about this man is rough: his face, his clothes, his jaw. His eyes. Against the polished wood and burnished gold and fine velvet and expensive leather of the Patrician’s office, this man sits like a handful of gravel on a pedestal.
Author:Roachpatrol  Fic  WordCount:0-2k  Tumblr  Discworld  <3 
july 2016 by Brandysnaps
Sinking Fear In Quiet Steps
This apartment, these walls and corners, these floors and doorways, they’re Dirk’s refuge. His shell, his armor. This place is light and warmth in an endlessly empty dark sea, a piece of the past to cling to in the wreckage of the future. A gift from his brother, a birthday present, the present of having birthdays, of being a human in a place meant for humans. Dirk could go out on rocket board, on rap-bot, on rafts, following the gulls, living free out under the sky, sailing by the light of the stars, but always he’d return to his sanctuary, his roost, his home.

This apartment is Dave’s cage, and he spent thirteen years crammed up against the bars by a man who did not love him.
fanwork  fandom:Homestuck  pairing:gen  rating:G  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:AO3  author:roachpatrol  quality:crocodile  extra:family  Extra:Abuse 
june 2016 by opalsong
When The Wolf Comes Home by roachpatrol (PG-13)
Through a dark ritual, Draco Malfoy is sent back in time, from his seventeenth year to his eleventh. Now he has the chance to use his superior knowledge and skill to change everything and save all his friends and family, but there's a terrible complication: it turns out that not even time travel can cure a case of lycanthropy.

werewolf!Draco, Griffindor!Draco
fanfiction  fandom:Harry_Potter  drama  angst  timetravel  werewolves  gen  author:roachpatrol  rating:pg-13  WIP 
june 2016 by jenna_marianne
roachpatrol: but I will hold as long as you like
“Is he frightened of me?” she asks abruptly, impolitely, when the secretary finds her still in the courtyard, lopping the blooms off of rosebushes with her sword.
AO3  pairing:Csethiro/Maia  warning:child_abuse  rating:PG13  trope:marriage  author:roachpatrol  genre:h/c  fandom:TheGoblinEmperor  !het 
april 2016 by Miscella
electing strange perfections - roachpatrol - Homestuck [Archive of Our Own]
Dave says, bouncing his heel on your thigh for attention, “Are you drunk? Holy shit, are you— like, are you tripping out? Did Rose just roofie you with her pretentious fuckin’ leaf water? Oh my god.”

“Oh my god,” Rose repeats, and colors brilliantly across her cheeks, blood coursing bright and close under her skin.

|| This is surprising and lovely.
fandom:homestuck  author:roachpatrol  pairing:dave/kanaya(moirail)  pairing:rose/kanaya  type:moirallegiance  type:threesome  type:drunkenhonesty  type:cuddling  type:workingitout  type:birdsongsweet  type:asteroidbound2  length:1-5k 
january 2016 by blottingtheink
Virtue Needs Some Cheaper Thrills - roachpatrol - Calvin & Hobbes [Archive of Our Own]
The thing is: Hobbes would go, if they told him to.

|| I so rarely feel unfulfilled by a good character or what-if piece, but oh--I want 10,000 more words of this, you'd just introduced the CONFLICT, oh, it's a silver teaspoon, and I would like a trough, please.
fandom:calvinandhobbes  author:roachpatrol  type:gen  type:posttext  type:takeanideaandrun  type:softly  type:ouchmyheart  type:short  length:<1k 
february 2014 by blottingtheink
Chasing Those Circles In The Ground
CG: DO YOU WANT ME TO COME OVER?
CA: oh my god really
CG: YEAH. I MEAN, IF THAT WOULDN’T BE WEIRD.
CA: fuckin hell i shoulda got gillpox prevvious if that wwas all itd take for you to accept my standin invvitation to come and hang
fandom:homestuck  pairing:eridan/karkat  author:roachpatrol  length:10-15k 
october 2013 by captainmander
Hemostuck
Alternia: where warm blood defines a troll's nobility, cold blood their commonalty, and Her Imperial Luminescence Aradia Megido struggles to keep her people together. Whether or not she can do it before Ascension Day is another thing entirely.
fandom:homestuck  pairing:eridan/sollux  pairing:sollux/karkat  pairing:karkat/gamzee  pairing:eridan/karkat  pairing:eridan/sollux/karkat  author:roachpatrol  author:urbananchorite  length:>100k  !series  au:bloodswap 
october 2013 by captainmander
Everything Is Alright by roachpatrol (Homestuck)
“Karkat, there is actual stuff growing out of that infection.”

You shrug. “Yeah, I guess.” You don’t really want to admit to cutting yourself during sickle practice. “No big deal, man, it’ll clear up.”

brilliant, as expected by roachpatrol. wonderful exploration of the troll world, even if its just one zombie like disease, so detailed and thought and also feelings. being told from the pov of the infected really gave it a certain edge, as well. yeeessss <3
Homestuck  fic  dark  porny  shorti  author:roachpatrol  solkat 
august 2013 by RunAwayRabbit
Vriska Serket And The Raddest Movie Marathon Ever (the No Sun In My Sky remix) [Roachpatrol]
AG: May8e
AG: If you're not too freaked out 8y all the 8ad things I've done........
AG: Or the fact that I am an alien
AG: We could go on a d8? ::::O
Author:Roachpatrol  Fic  Homestuck  Romance  Angst  John/Vriska  <3  WordCount:  Source 
august 2013 by Brandysnaps
tiny pacific rim post-movie fic
He is fourteen and sweaty sparring lessons with shirtless well-built men are starting to leave more than just her shirt damp.
fanwork  fandom:PacificRim  pairing:Raleigh/Mako  rating:nc-17  length:oneshot  type:prose  site:tumblr  author:roachpatrol  quality:whale  extra:RailswithPails  extra:queer  extra:friendship 
july 2013 by opalsong
I Will Buy The Flower Shop, And You Will Never Be Lonely. [Roachpatrol]
He walks like a cat who has tape on his paws, and has had tape on his paws for a very long time, and who never expects to ever again walk without scrunching miserably from side to side in a tangle of self-loathing and confusion. It hurts to look at him, but it hurts more not to.
Author:Roachpatrol  Fic  Homestuck  John/Karkat  Friendship  Angst  Fluff  Short  WordCount:  Source 
april 2013 by Brandysnaps
One For The Money, Two For The Show [Roachpatrol]
You’ve probably put palm to a solid fourth of your cohort’s crop of enactors by now. Certainly anyone over teal with big horns and a talent for looming.
Author:Roachpatrol  Fic  Homestuck  Equius/Nepeta  Gen  FutureFic  Schmoop  Short  WordCount:  Source 
april 2013 by Brandysnaps

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